Hoo boy, this is gonna be a long one. Alrighty.
As a refresher and for reference, the headcanons are:
2. Unrealistic, but hilarious
3. Heart crushing and awful, but fun to inflict on friends
4. Unrealistic, but to hell with canon
1. His mother is a bully, and he's simply emulating the adult that's most present in his life
2. He strikes me as the kinda guy that gets really into lipsynching pop songs, and gets caught doing so at inopportune moments
3. This pertains specifically to the Trevor Hallgrim AU: even though he knows he won't see his mother for at least 10 years, he still gets scared being alone on the street. He feels like she's going to be just around the next corner, waiting for him...
4. Honestly? Could see him with a college education and a good job. Kid's going places
1. If he thinks too hard about tying his shoes, he forgets how to. He can only do it through muscle memory
2. He's fluent in another language (let's say Welsh), and mostly uses it to swear without his friends being shocked
3. Still figuring out his gender, and struggles to figure out why he always feels so ill at ease in his own skin
4. Honestly, he seems like he'd be a good cook too. Maybe that's not "unrealistic", persay, but we never see the kids cook, so why not
1. In pain, 24/7/365. Dude walks up and down stairs for a living. As someone that walks multiple miles a day for work, I can tell you that the man's joints are screaming lmao
2. Outstanding singing voice. Y'know those scenes in movies where the guy with a gruff voice just belts out with a professional set of pipes? Yeah, that's him
3. He's had a rough time of life. Uncertainty of direction, no goals, etc. It wasn't his first choice to be a bell keeper, but when fate led him to it, he found something that really made him happy and stayed
4. Really good driver. Liked to run from the cops as a teenager just to test his skills
1. She's an Earl Grey kinda gal. And I love her for it
2. Smart though she is, sometimes she just... isn't. In the way that she'd get a can of Febreze and whisper "oh this is going to be so efficient" before spraying it into a desk fan. And subsequently into her own face when it blows back
3. Comes from a broken home and is still trying to recover from it. Whenever she's short with Hilda, she beats herself up over it, desperate to not become like her parents
4. Could absolute rock Erik Ahlberg's sh-t, and would do so with the most minor provocation