dyrus

this game has taken over my life

I think my most embarrassing story on here that I have yet to tell is there was this girl who asked me how she looked in her dress or something like that I forgot what it was specifically but... I went back to hawaii to visit family and she was super cute and I wanted to get to know her more and so I tried to talk to her in a less crowded environment but I was so stun locked I didn't know what to say so it was just awkward over and over. I thought she was in to me but I was so wrong, my hair was terrible, my fashion was wack, I had literally 0 rizz and it was the most awkward interaction i've ever had with anyone my entire life.

We went to the mall after the whole fan meet thing I was doing and everything went so wrong I'm pretty sure she pretended that her friend was the gamestop employee but I think I said something like I'd call her an uber ride home or something and then I ditched to go to a rave. It was all so bad that I don't even remember everything that happened that day but later that night I hit on someone else for the first time in my life and their friend just gave me the most digusting look and waved me away.

It was possibly the top 3 of worst days I've ever had in my life and if i could just erase it from my memory, the only redeeming thing is that I got to see one of my high school friends there randomly and he was insanely friendly having the time of his life. I've never felt like a bigger loser in my entire life and it still bugs me to this day that I handled it so badly. It's like one of those things where I'm in my safe space, try to go out of it a little bit and just failing. It also makes me never wanna go back to hawaii even though that's where my family and friends are that I would like to see but god I feel so disgusted at how that day went and even though I shouldn't care I just have to type it all out here to just somehow get over it from my memory. Anyways, that was like 6 years ago or so and I'm glad I grew up a lot since then.

thank u

i was in a kind mood that day, i've been very happy for the last few months

ok

sorry lol

there's no way twitch let this goes on for more then a week right

korean and japan airlines were the best for me but otherwise it's super mid glorified microwave food

i hate having to go out to find new friends for the games i play

the happiest day of my life is tournament winning days and days after my taxes are done for the year.

also when I was in japan I spent 4000$ on the arcade, other then that I'm unsure what my happiest days would be. next year i'm looking forward to uni, project l, and hopefully motivation to stream

I appreciate you guys for being in a place where I feel like is my safe space for just throwing my thoughts out there.

I won't be answering any of my inbox questions before this because I don't know what to say but you can treat this post as an obligation for me to answer anything reasonable for atleast the next two days.

keep them simple too please thanks

i learned that i only become depressed or manic if i'm bored

therefore i must find things to keep myself busy or else another twitter meltdown happens

with christmas coming up i am actually pretty happy with my life atm

i just found out what it feels like to have to much empathy and i am going crazy because of it.

i actually just need someone to hug me so hard it just leaves my body

i need to be dispeled oh my god i am so tired

i just found out what it feels like to have to much empathy and i am going crazy because of it.

i actually just need someone to hug me so hard it just leaves my body

i need to be dispeled oh my god i am so tired