Seeking

A woman to look at my butt. And touch it. And tell me it's nice.

Check these cheeks

Honestly the biggest disappointment I had researching ABC was that medieval authors did not, in fact, see the creatures they were describing and were trying their best to describe them with their limited knowledge while going “what the fuck… what the fuck…”

Instead all those creatures you know came about from transcription and translation errors from copying Greco-Roman sources (who themselves got them from travelers’ tales from Persia and India - rhino -> unicorn, tiger -> manticore, python -> dragon, and so on).

So unicorns are real

behold… a unicorn

I always thought animals in medieval manuscripts looked like the result of having to draw say. A Tree Kangaroo, but your only source for what it looked like was your friend who heard it from a fellow who knows a man who swears he saw one once, whilst very drunk and lost, and I am SO PLEASED  to find out this is, in fact, the case.

Questing Beast

- Neck of a snake

- body of a leopard

- haunches of a lion

- feet off a hart (deer)

So is it

Or….

i would sleep so much better with your arms wrapped around me

This perfectly encapsulates why I hate “The Big Bang Theory” (x)

Howard: So it’s settled! The fate of Doctor Who’s TARDIS will be decided by a Game of Thrones inspired death match on the battlefield of Thundercats versus Transformers.

Person filming: [audible tapping of spacebar key to pause video]

Person filming: [yelling loudly, accompanied by hand gestures ] FUCK YOU! WHERE WAS THE JOKE? 

Person filming: [still angry, more hasty] HE JUST FUCKING NAMED A BUNCH OF SHIT! HOW IS THIS COMEDY?

Person filming: [unpauses video]

Show: [laugh track, actors on screen awkwardly laughing]

Person filming: [overlapping audio of show, audibly irate] WHY ARE YOU LAUGHING? WHYYY?!?!

@captioned-vines

I fucking hate that show. This person is me.

Ready Player One (2018, directed by Steven Spielberg, based on the novel by Ernest Cline)

Fun fact:

I have never met a “nerd” that likes BBT and the one really fervent fan I met was a coach from my High School that was probably the sort of meathead that bullied “nerds” back in the day.

The show isn’t actually made for Geeks, it’s made for people that want to feel like Geeks now that being one is trendy and don’t actually know anything about nerdy sub-cultures beyond stereotypes.  

I don’t know the context of this scene, but the fact that they felt the need to specify ‘Doctor Who’s TARDIS’ like the audience wasn’t going to know which TARDIS they were talking about supports this theory.

Also, if you refer to the Doctor as ‘Doctor Who’, every nerd within a five mile radius will frantically come running to correct you.

where’s that picture thats like “laugh track plays despite the absence of a joke”

I like her so much you guys, I keep like... Telling all my friends and eventually someone's gonna smack me... And I also keep smiling like a fuckin goober because she's just so gorgeous and funny and sweet.

GUYS SHE'S MY GIRLFRIEND NOW 😭

“think you can handle my 10 inches?”

*sticks tip in*

this website needs to be dowsed in holy water

I uglied laughed in class😔

now THIS is how you photograph a mirror. unapologetically.

mr incredible the american bastard