my dream job is to be a jewellery box ballerina

flipping burgers is one of the most honourable professions u can be in. literally everyone likes burgers

At the annual Houston RenFest we’d always get one or two furries that walk around and every time the general reaction from the medieval roleplayers is akin to  “BEASTS? BEASTS THAT WALK LIKE MAN? FOUL!” 

Last time I went a furry volunteered for an impromptu conversion/exorcism and a guy dressed as a monk gathered a bunch of people and using a Gatorade bottle performed an entire catholic christening while reading off the instructions on his Ipad. When the furry was fully “converted” he removed the head of his costume and everyone in the crowd pretended to freak out and say shit like “GlORY BE HE IS SAVED” “CHRIST HAS BROKEN HIS CURSE”

That’s the best crap i’ve heard in months

have I mentioned that i’m fucking in love with humankind

4th of July Car launch in Alaska

she's an athlete

can i jsut say… isnt it insane that polar bears go underground like imagine just walking along with a shovel and u start digging a hole and a bear is in there

THEYRE JUST? THERE…. IN THE SNOW

I know it‘s supposed to be scary that there is apex predators just potentially sleeping under the surface of the snow like some kind of greek mythology monster but it just makes me laugh bc them living in holes just means polar bears just have little houses and look out of their little windows like:

Mini hawk launched from car. Attacks an unsuspecting invasive species.

Drive-by kestrel!

This wouldn't happen to me if i were a huge dragon

Potion of fucking idiot

his videos make me feel like I'm awake at 5 in the morning against my will and everyone else at the party is either unconscious or staring at the corner like the blair witch

god people have always been people. victorian noblewomen stubbed their toes and swore about it. medieval peasants ripped hangnails a little too hard and sucked on it to make it better. cavemen put kids on their shoulders so the kids could get their handprints up on the wall. someone in the 1760s played with their dog and someone in the 1340s dragged themself out of bed at some unholy hour of the morning to soothe a crying baby and someone in the 1550s stuck a flower behind their lovers ear. I'm gonna be sick people have always been people

our fates are entwined whether you like it or not you stupid bastard

i mean . no shit?

DJ bunny rabbit has got the whole club burrowing into the soft loam of the dance floor

Mice straight up go on missions and no body talks about it

Idk seems like a lot of people talk about it.