you. yes you, person with rejection sensitive dysphoria. this message is for you. your friends DON'T hate you. they aren't mad at you. they aren't talking behind your back or wished to cut their friendship with you. they love you and treasure you and they are good people who wouldn't hurt you like that! ok, that's all. have a nice day.
Just opened my fic document and found this
Thanks, past me. Incredibly helpful.
Polaroids from Dolly Parton's latest book Behind The Seams.
it should be illegal to put ads in apps or sites for solitaire or picross or sudoku tbh. playing classic puzzle games uninterrupted needs to be a HUMAN RIGHT
Hey hey
Everyone go download "Simon Tatham's Puzzles" by Chris Boyle
Here is a Play Store link:
It contains pretty much any famous puzzle I've ever known, with the exception of riddle-based or language-based puzzles. All puzzles are automatically generated by your phone, and highly customizable in difficulty, size, and other variables. Note that the puzzles often have other names than they classically have (e.g. Sudoku is named "Solo"), but almost everything is in there.
The app is free, it is ad-free, doesn't necessarily look pretty but is very functional! Also bc it's all randomly generated on your phone, you don't need to give it access to internet at all! And you get infinite puzzles! And it doesn't ask you for personal info, you don't need an account, they don't want to "send your information to the developer to help develop the app/sell to third parties".
And it has a dark-mode!
Idiots to lovers implies that they stop being idiots when they finally get together, but that is just not true, they will always be idiots
“magic isnt real” — plants just grow out of the ground. for free. everywhere.
"It doesn't stop being magic just because you know how it works."
-Terry Pratchett
A fic rec of One Direction fics in which one or both of the main characters meeting the family plays an important role in the fic as requested in this ask. If you enjoy the fics, please leave kudos and comments for the writers! You can find my other fic recs here. Happy reading!
(E, 195k, Grace Kelly au) Harry Styles is a world-famous actor at the height of his career but a personal low point when he meets His Serene Highness Prince Louis of Monaco by chance. He doesn’t think they’ll ever see each other again, but after striking up a correspondence, it turns out they have more in common than he thought.
(E, 99k, Will and Kate au) Prince Harold Edward Styles Lancaster is second in line to the throne of Great Britain. He is also your average Uni student- or he tries to be, anyway.
(M, 76k, While You Were Sleeping au) When Harry, a lonely transit worker, saves the life of the handsome commuter he's been secretly pining for, an innocent mistake results in Liam Payne's family believing that Harry is engaged to their son. In the Paynes, Harry finds the big family he's always longed for...and a love he never saw coming.
(E, 68k, falling in love) This is the extraordinarily ordinary AU where Harry falls in love for the first time and Louis learns how to fall in love all over again.
(M, 59k, royal) the one where Harry doesn't realize his boyfriend is a prince until he takes a "royal soulmate" quiz online and has to decide if he wants to pack up his life and try to fit in with royals.
(E, 43k, royal) a Crazy Rich Asians AU with a royal twist where Harry is a prince, Louis is most definitely not, and there’s a royal wedding to attend.
(E, 37k, movie au) “You’re going to spend Christmas - and your birthday - with his homophobic WASP parents? That’s gonna be hell.”
(M, 37k, A Walk in the Clouds au) Harry and Louis agree to a temporary arrangement that Harry can't seem to walk away from no matter how many times he tries.
(NR, 36k, Christmas) Harry cannot go home alone when he had promised to bring a significant other again. This leaves him with little choice but to find someone to pretend they are his fiance.
(E, 35k, fake relationship) When Louis lies to his family and says he’ll bring his new boyfriend home for Christmas, his best friend and roommate Harry agrees to play the part. It’s that, or be left alone over the holidays.
(E, 34k, omegaverse) Louis and Harry have been roommates for four years, comfortable in their routine and their relationship. But all of that is about to change.
(E, 32k, fake relationship) Louis has no idea that one act of kindness will cause his life to spiral out of control. But that's what happens when his new friend fake proposes to him and a video of it goes viral.
(E, 30k, royal) the one where Zayn and Louis make a friendly wager and it goes too far, Harry's a baker with a heart of gold and really great hair, Liam is an overworked PA who just wants to enjoy his holiday and Niall is completely at ease, as always. An accidentally married AU mixed with a splash of modern royalty.
🍍 Turn and face the strange by orphan_account
(E, 26k, royal) the one where Harry is going to be King, Louis can't handle it like he thinks, Zayn is finally happy, Liam's a massive geek and Niall's marrying a princess.
(T, 25k, movie au) Ever since Harry finally made the decision to come out to his mother as bisexual, she’s been foisting women on him left and right, determined it’s just a phase. But when she puts out a personal ad to find the perfect partner for her son, things really get complicated.
🍍 bring out feelings in me i never show by orphan_account
(M, 24k, fake relationship) Louis accidentally hires a felon to be his fake boyfriend for Thanksgiving. Or, the fake boyfriends au no one asked for
(G, 3k, Zayn/Liam) Liam and Zayn have been fake dating for almost a year to get their parents off their backs. Liam’s a closeted lesbian and Zayn’s a trans woman who is also not out to her parents. It seems like the perfect plan to give them both some peace, until feelings get involved.
🍍 Fine Line by LadyAJ_13 / @ladyaj-13
(G, 1k, Louis/Nick Grimshaw) Telling his family was always going to be a big deal, but doing it alone was a sacrifice he could make. He never thought they’d fall about laughing.
*penis starts throbbing* my arch nemesis is near…
wankfest prompts
it’s been brought to my attention that there aren’t a lot of wanking prompts, so here are a few for y’all to use/combine however you want:
- trying to wank but the cat/dog/lizard won’t stop watching
- awkward sperm donations
- strangers wanking in neighboring bathroom stalls
- walking in on your roommate wanking and then asking them not to stop
- clone a willy but they clone some other stuff instead
- accidentally answering skype/facetime from a friend mid-wank
- quiet wanking while their partner sleeps in the same bed beside them
- first time wanking with a toy (or other things)
- first time wanking on camera
- wanking in zero gravity
- trying to wank super fast because they have a lot of housemates and thin walls and no one is home
- circle jerks with rules, ex: everyone has to come in a certain order or else
- wanking race
- wanking and trying not to come first
- body swap wanking
- first wank after giving up wanking for whatever reason
- last wank before giving up wanking for whatever reason
- sex toy tester
- wanking using The Force
- wanking using some sort of superhero power
- self-fellatio
- self-bondage
ok that’s more than 20, go forth and write wanking smut!
Sunday Snippet
I was tagged by the wonderful @haztobegood to share a snippet of my current WIP - so here we go. From my fic for @onedirectionbigbang that I've been writing for, which is a Heartstopper AU ❤️
As he approached the house, he took a deep breath, taking in the sight of the modest-looking brick building. Reaching up, Zayn pressed the doorbell firmly, the two-tone chime ringing through the house, promptly triggering a round of barking. Zayn grinned at the sound and took a step back in preparation for the inevitable when Liam opened the door. Sure enough, as soon as there was room, a brown and white collie through herself at Zayn, who tugged his beanie off and dropped to his knees just in time to catch her. “Hi there, hello,” he greeted the dog enthusiastically. “You must be Nellie, hi, hello, aren’t you lovely?” The dog let out a soft whuff, and licked enthusiastically at Zayn’s cheek. “Hi,” Liam eventually said, a huge grin on his face as he watched the sight before him, his eyes scrunched up into slits. “Hi there,” Zayn managed to say, before returning his attention to Nellie. “Oh, I see how it is,” Liam huffed. “You’re just here for the dog.” “Yep, definitely,” Zayn agreed. “I’m using you for your dog. Couldn’t give a shit about you.” “You can go off a person,” Liam grumbled. “Nah, you can’t,” Zayn grinned. “Your dog likes me too much for that.” Liam tilted his head slightly as he looked at Zayn. “Did you… cut your hair?” he asked uncertainly.
I'm going to tag @lululawrence @kingsofeverything @beelou @laynefaire @allwaswell16 @fallinglikethis and anyone else who wants to share!
The guy’s eyes are so blue that Harry can’t tear his gaze away, even as he moves to the beat. The searing light shade is magnetic; he finds himself leaning in and yelling, “This is my jam!” only to earn a laugh from thin pink lips that Harry’s definitely going to be dreaming about tonight.
“Your jam?”
When the guy yells back over the music, his blue eyes sparkling and his lips twisted in a smirk, Harry’s chest literally puffs out with pride at earning his attention. His obvious approval. Tongue-tied, Harry nods and closes his eyes as he lets go, the music reverberating around them. All of the usual inhibitions that keep him in the corner at parties fall away and he bounces around the center of the dance floor, waving his arms above his head. Somehow his towel stays on, even as he starts to think he wouldn’t mind if it fell off. Fuck it. He finally made it here, he’s damn well going to enjoy it.
Harry goes to a gay bathhouse for the first time. 90s AU.
4.5k // READ ON AO3
all debates abt the artistic merits of fanfiction fail to recognize the purpose of fic. you don’t write fic to be published or to learn how to construct a narrative although you can use it to develop style. you write it so that your friends will message you “bestie you’re utterly deranged for this one im eating dirt”
1.
“Lou says you’re around eight to ten weeks along if that helps,” she says to jog his memory.
Harry already knows exactly how far along he is. He doesn’t need Lou or his stupid hormone levels to tell him that.
“Wait a minute,” Niall interjects with narrowed eyes. “You were in Hawaii eight to ten weeks ago,” he points out like he’s the only one in the room who can fucking count.
“Yes, I was in Hawaii,” Harry confirms through gritted teeth.
“You hooked up with a random in Hawaii and you didn’t tell me?” Niall says with a scandalized expression. Harry swears he’s going to punch him.
2.
“A thing... as in a special sign between the two of you?” Gemma smirks. “That’s so gross it’s cute.”
“Shut up,” Harry rolls his eyes, attempting to hide his blush behind his coffee, but he knows it’s useless. “It doesn’t mean anything. People get name signs that are special. And, you and I have secret signs.”
“That we made up when we were five and wanted to sneak sweets behind mum’s back,” Gemma snorts. “But, I get it. Special signs for special people. Michal and I also had special signs when we were still PRETENDING to be just friends.”
3.
He genuinely looks disappointed until Louis closes the door behind them and then steps around Harry to lead the way down the corridor. Harry’s face lights up like the bloody sun and Louis rolls his eyes.
“Don’t smirk at me like you’ve won or whatever. I’m only going for the food. And I’m only leading the way to James’ office because you still don’t know how to get there.”
Harry quickly schools his face into seriousness, adding a serious nod along with it. “Oh, of course, Louis,” he says, delighted grin still shining through despite Louis’ request. “Whatever you say, mate.”
4.
In the long breath of silence that passes between them, Louis steps forward into his space making Harry go still before him. There are several alarm bells ringing in Harry’s head, but he doesn’t move when Louis leans in, bypassing Harry’s stunned lips to press a kiss to his cheek.
Those blue eyes pierce him yet again when they suddenly crinkle up with a fresh grin as he pulls away.
“What was that?” Harry asks, noting the peculiar, uneven rhythm of his heartbeat flooding his ears as the butterflies return to flood his stomach.
“A bookmark.”
This Wikipedia article has a more comprehensive list
Crazy how many people want characters in fiction to speak and act like they’ve had 20 hours of intensive therapy. Could NOT be me I want these bitches fucked up insane