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here & queer & tired

@nbandproud / nbandproud.tumblr.com

Aster. They/them or ey/em. Socialist activist, photographer by degree. Ask me in private for Discord & Telegram. Follow my queer rants on the Fediverse @stardust@queer.party!
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reblogged

something that really interests me is the way i see many people talking about gender from a synesthetic viewpoint, and i wonder why it isn’t discussed more from that perspective?

(keep in mind i’m not a doctor or neurologist or anything i just think this stuff is really cool)

if you aren’t familiar with the term “synesthesia”, it’s a medically documented phenomenon where the stimulation of one sense causes you to have perceptions in another sense. the more well-known forms of it are grapheme-color (where someone perceives letters and/or numbers as having colors) and chromesthesia (where someone associates sounds with colors) but there are many, many different ways that people experience synesthesia. and the idea of senses blending or overlapping isn’t that uncommon: think of how we say bright colors are “loud” or that cold air is “sharp”.

specifically i want to discuss the idea of gender-related synesthesia! when people talk about gender in ways like “my gender is large and round” or “my gender is soft and translucent”, i see that as being a synesthetic experience. (note: since gender isn’t really so much a “sense” like hearing or smell or sight, this experience would probably fall under “ideasthesia” instead, a word sometimes used meaning “association of concepts with sensory experiences”, but since the concepts are pretty similar i’ll just use the word “synesthesia” for this post.)  most of these are categorized as xenogenders, and i’ve seen the word “synesgender” used a few times but it seems pretty rare! i actually think it could be a good idea to have “synesgender” as a more common classification for genders that are described using sense and sensation, e.g. colorgender and similar genders. 

and this is where a lot of people get confused or even angry at the concept, because “but gender can’t be soft or round or purple or any of these things!” but that’s the thing: not everyone experiences synesthesia, so not everyone is going to understand how it feels. take me: i have synesthesia. i see shapes and patterns in my head when i hear music (and some other sounds). also, when i hear spoken words, i see the word written out in my head. people may not be able to conceptualize what it’s like to experience this, but that doesn’t mean i don’t experience it. and since there are so many forms of synesthesia, there are tons that i don’t have and i can’t begin to imagine what it’s like to, for example, taste words when i say them! but that doesn’t mean that other people don’t experience it themselves. so i believe in respecting people when they describe their gender using concepts of synesthesia, or other ways not connected to a gender binary.

i’m also curious about how many people who describe their genders like this experience other forms of synesthesia. and hey maybe this post will be helpful to someone who’s trying to figure out why they experience gender the way they do? 

in conclusion, both synesthesia and gender are very cool thanks for coming to my ted talk

(also if other synesthetic people have anything to add about their perceptions of gender, please do!)

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reblogged
Anonymous asked:

hi. um I'm rlly confused. i feel like my gender is close to female but not actually female. but at the same time i feel like it's outside the binary? so like proximal to female/similar, but also it's own gender. basically like an alternate version of female. it's not like.. part girl/part agender or part nb bc its completely separated from all that, but the closest it feels is to female. im confused af and any ideas would b appreciated ;; lmk if youd like elaboration?

Altegirl or Lunarian might be what you’re looking for!

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nbandproud

Nonbinary woman and juxera are also close fits to that description, imho.

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kiloueka

Anti-vaxxers, please, there is one thing I really need yall to understand

(Ok there’s a lot of things you need to understand but let’s start with this)

Vaccines aren’t just for you or your kid.

  • They’re for the infant that’s too young to be vaccinated yet.
  • They’re for the cancer patient who’s immunocompromised.
  • They’re for the people who can’t get vaccinated for health reasons. 
  • They’re for the people a very small percentage of vaccines fail.
  • They’re for the people that are already sick with something else and their immune system can’t handle another disease at the same time.
  • They’re for the children whose parents refuse to vaccinate them and expose them to dozens of other unvaccinated people.
  • They’re for the unvaccinated pregnant person who might pull through just fine from something but could potentially lose their baby.
  • They’re for the people who have health issues that weaken their immune systems.
  • They’re for the elderly person in hospice who’s too weak to fight off even the flu anymore.
  • They’re for the people who don’t have access to vaccines due to financial or other reasons.

Almost all of these people are at high risk of dying or experiencing lifelong complications from something as “harmless” as the flu or measles. They are the people that need to be protected by herd immunity. 

I know that all the posts going around make vaccines seem like big scary things that’ll kill your kid from being in the same room with them but they’re one of the safest medical procedures one can go through. The minuscule chance of complications happening far outweighs the big chance of bad things happening to both your unvaccinated child and anyone they potentially come in contact with.

TL;DR; VACCINATE

(P.S. I might make a series of posts like this if people are interested. I’ll be tagging it #vaxrants on my blog)

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reblogged

girlhood is so traumatic, especially as a young lesbian. being abused for something you don’t even know is part of you yet, because other people somehow notice it before you do.

no wonder so many of us feel disconnected from womanhood, and the only connection we have with it is our lesbianism, our ability to love women as women ourselves.

this is why being a nonbinary lesbian is a thing. why she/her pronouns may feel alien, hurtful, reminding us of difficult times, even sometimes provoking dysphoria.

respect nonbinary lesbians, respect lesbians who go by they/them, he/him or other sets of pronouns, respect lesbians who deal with dysphoria. we are wonderful and strong.

non-lesbians can and should reblog this post

This includes trans lesbians’ girlhoods

absolutely.

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reblogged
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xeno-aligned
Anonymous asked:

Hey I just found your blog after discovering the version identity and I was hoping to know more about the design of the flag. Where did the colours and pattern come from? Thanks heaps!

sorry, i don’t know what flag & identity you’re talking about!

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nbandproud

I would guess version is auto-correct for versian (the nblnb + nblw + nblm combination), but only anon knows for sure...

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I just wanted to give a shout out to demiromantic people who often get the short end when it comes to celebrations. This isn’t a very pretty post because I don’t have the emotional bandwidth for outright cheer but like I’ve experienced it and seen others bullied into silence so like hey, I see you. 

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bi women: receive death threats, rape threats, suicide threats, messages calling them “cock-worshipping dicksluts who should be on their knees”/”bihets”/”women who deserve to be abused”/”women who want to get railed/” and other messages that blatantly wish sexual violence upon bi women and victim-blame them

everyone on this site: ignores this, doesn’t give a shit, blinks and scrolls past, doesn’t care

a bi woman on twitter or some publication: writes something stupid or goofy 

everyone on this site: god i’m so tired of mogai libqueers infiltrating this community. bi people need to stop being homophobic and stop complaining about biphobia. maybe if bi people weren’t such homophobes then the lgbt community would care about them! stop expecting gay people to care about you when you won’t even take responsibility for bisexual homophobia. god all bi women can do is write buzzfeed articles about how mean gay people are. “bi visibility month, aka when cis feminine white upper-class bi women in relationships with men whine about gay people”. all bi people do is whine and complain. they’re so fucking entitled. 

The same assholes who say “stop forcing gay people to care about your het relationship” to bi women are also the ones who ignore these things and they’d be the type to refuse to help bi women who’ve been abused and that’s all facts, no printer

this post isn’t for t*rfs and transmisogynists! especially since y’all have a huge hand in the sexual harassment bi women get! especially since bi trans women face double the rate of sexual harassment! keep your hands off this post! 

let’s also talk about how it’s primarily been me and other outspoken bisexual women of color bloggers who bear the brunt of these rampant sexually violent messages, especially black bi women and bi trans woc and gnc bi woc as well. so much for the bi community being filled with cis white feminine upper-class people. i guess that falls by the wayside when non-bisexuals want to find which bi women are acceptable to target lol 

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(hi! I hope it is OK to ask but is ey pronounced like eye or like ee or something else?)

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I would pronounce ey/em/eir like they/them/their, only without the “th“ sound. So more like “eh-ee“ (but fast), I think?

I don’t mind the question, but I’m probably not the right person to answer, since I’m not a native English speaker and I mostly communicate in English through writing.

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Hey um, the 2019 Intersex Inclusion Survey is mainly being circulated in TERF circles right now, which I feel like I shouldn’t have to explain is uh… Bad? So please take it! Please circulate it! Share it on and off Tumblr!

You don’t have Intersex or LGBTQ+ to take it!

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hazel2468

hey all- if you can, fill this out! It’s super quick and the idea of the results being skewed because of a shit sample is killing my lil research-brain. 

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reblogged
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nbandproud

Final* version of the juvelic / glg / [someone] loving [someone] chart for w/m/nb identities!

I also made a version without repeating the labels, based on a version @jynto made before:

I am also working on a text-only version, however since it’s taking too long to make, I will put it on a separate post/reblog.

I’m going to copy/paste the how to use and the Q&A from the original version here:

How to use:
1) Think about what your gender entails. For example, nonbinary woman.
2) Go to the line or one of the lines that specifies the gender you have. For nonbinary woman, you can go to nonbinary > woman or to woman > nonbinary. Both lines are the same.
3) Think about what your gender-based attraction or what you want to reveal about it entails. For example, nonbinary people and women.
4) Look for the column or columns that specify that attraction. In this case, again, you’ll have to look for either the nonbinary > woman column or the woman > nonbinary column.
5) See where the line and column cross! In this example, it should be iridian (nblnb, nblw, wlnb and wlw).
Remember you can use broader labels too! So if you are iridian, for instance, you can also use sapphic, enbian, and so on, if you want.
But how can you be both nonbinary and a man/a woman/a man and a woman?
Some nonbinary people may consider themselves one or both binary genders besides being nonbinary because:
  • They have multiple genders (at the same time or not), and one or some of them are binary or binary-adjacent; (examples: a person is trigender and their genders are man, woman and neutrois, or a person is genderfluid and their gender changes between agender and woman)
  • They have a single gender connected to one or both binary genders even if those genders aren’t binary; (examples: a person has a single gender that is a mix of maverique and woman, or a person is a proxvir, which means they have a gender similar to man but different in some way)
  • They have a certain connection to one or both binary genders because of presentation, pronouns/titles, desired transition, or other characteristics. (examples: a person is agender but doesn’t mind being treated as a man in general, or a person is dulcigender but has a connection to being a woman for desiring a physical transition similar to a trans woman)
But how can you be both a man and a woman without being nonbinary?
A nonbinary person may consider themselves both a man and a woman and prefer an identity that only talks about them being both a man and a woman.
A person who is both a man and a woman may also not want to identify as nonbinary for any reason.
But all those labels are too complicated/hard to remember! Why not just use ____?
You may not use them if you don’t want to, but there are obviously people who want to use those more specific labels, or otherwise there wouldn’t be so much of them.

* this version is “final” because all slots are taken. However, if there are changes I deem important enough, I may make other versions of this.

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kalliepride

I love this! But carnelian is already the name of a gemstone - might I suggest changing it to “carnelinian,” just to avoid confusion? (I pronounce it like “carneLINian” but “carneLEENian” sounds ok too.)

I totally get it, I’ve run into trouble while trying to find content for this term. :/

I can’t seem to find the original coiner, though. The flag submission seems to be anonymous, and I didn’t find anything that points to the original post or something.

Does anyone here know the coiner? Do you think it may be a good idea to add this alternative version to posts about the identity, so the word is spread?

I think that submission was the first time I’ve heard of it, so I agree that a less confusing alternative could be beneficial. :)

-Fy

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dmnsqrl

Has there been more discussion about carnelian / carnelinian ?

Apparently, not; I can’t find any post tagged as carnelinian and I can’t find anything with the word on more popular IMOGA blogs.

However, it’s not like many people use carnelian either, so it wouldn’t be hard to popularize carnelinian over carnelian.

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a handy explanation for people who got he wrong definition of autigender and think its a bad/useless/harmful label:

❌ Autigender is Not: “autistic people cant understand gender so autistic people arent cis” or “allistic people who feel a connection to autism can use the concept of autism as a xenogender”

✔ Autigender Is: “for some autistic people, being autistic is directly linked to how we perceive our own gender, so a label describing an autism-specific gender experience is necessary to give us a word to describe our unique experiences.”

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nbandproud

Do you have resources on nonbinary men specifically? I'm trying to find info on it.

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I’m not sure of what kind of resources you want?

A nonbinary man is, usually, someone who does feel a connection to maleness and/or masculinity in some way, but who doesn’t completely identify as a [binary] man.

Some examples of people who may consider themselves nonbinary men are:

  • People who feel like they are partly, but not wholly, men; for instance, someone who is 15% a man and 85% genderless, or someone who is 70% a man and 30% a woman
  • People who don’t feel like they are binary at all, but who don’t mind being considered men with regards to attraction, transition, day-to-day life and/or so on to make things easier and/or because they identify with some ideas related to maleness and/or masculinity
  • People who are men, but feel alienated from the idea of being binary men because of some other identity they have, or because they feel like they interpret being a man in a way that’s different from what their society considers a man
  • People who are men some/most of the time, but not always; such as a genderfluid person who is usually a man but who sometimes has other/no gender(s)
  • People whose genders are a blend between man and something else
  • People who feel like their gender is close to that of a binary man’s, but just the label man on it’s own doesn’t fit
  • People who are nonbinary and masculine and prefer to say they are nonbinary men instead of using masculine-specific labels (such as mingender or ceteromasculine)
  • People who are proxvirs, demimen, quivermen, neuvirs, nixvirs, melles, neuromen, agender men, genderless men, genderflux men, demifluid men, duramen, androxes, xoys and other identities that mean you are a man in some way

It’s worth noting that not all people who use those labels and/or have these experiences use the label of nonbinary man. This list just means they theoretically could. And there are probably other reasons people identify as nonbinary men I don’t know of/don’t remember right now.

It may also be worth noting nonbinary men may use any pronouns sets they want, and may have had any gender assignment at birth.

I sadly can’t source these, since they come with personal experience from reading about experiences and the ways people use labels. The nonbinary man and nonbinary boy tags are full of general nonbinary/transmasculine/transgender posts with the occasional selfie, so I can’t link to anything, and most sites’ definitions of nonbinary man are either vague or lacking, imho.

I sent some messages to group chats I’m in, to see if there’s any nonbinary man/boy I can forward further questions to. If someone takes the offer, I’ll tag them on a reply to this post. I’m not a nonbinary man/boy myself, after all.

If any follower is a NB man/boy and wants to offer their help as well, feel free to reply!

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These people are open to answer further questions you may have about nonbinary men: @dadhoc @vitorrubiao

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Alternative scapolitian flag

So, I’m scapolitian (nblw & nblm), and I have to admit I don’t like the current flag. It’s hard to describe and to reproduce because of the similar colors, and whoever submitted it didn’t even describe the meanings of each stripes.

Then I decided to make a new one:

[Description: A flag composed of 4 horizontal stripes, which are dark grayish green, light grayish yellow, orange and purple. End image description.]

For reproduction purposes, any shade of dark green can be used for the first stripe (including olive), and the second stripe can be either a shade of light yellow, cream or white. Maybe even a very light gray. For the last stripe, purple is preferred to blue.

And here’s a version with a symbol, for those who are going to make digital graphics and/or print it and care more about having a distinguishable/easy to understand flag than a easy to reproduce one:

[Description: Same image as above, but there’s a nonbinary symbol interlocked with a Venus symbol and a Mars symbol on the center of the flag. All symbols are flat and black. End image description.]

Here are the color meanings:

Green: Diamoric attraction/identity; this person considers their nonbinary gender identity as relevant for their attraction, or else they wouldn’t be using the term;

Yellow/Cream/White: Diversity of scapolitian experiences; scapolitians may have any identity which isn’t binary (they may even use the term scapolitian without liking to use the term nonbinary for themselves), they may use labels other than nonbinary for their gender or not, they may use other labels for their attraction or not, they may be a-spec or allo, they may be attracted to some genders more than others or not, they may be attracted to identities other than man and woman or not, and so on;

Orange: Trixic attraction, or nonbinary attraction to women;

Purple: Toric attraction, or nonbinary attraction to men.

All colors were taken from photos of scapolites.

If these images are too low quality for you, you can get better ones on Imgur! Since Tumblr may not publish this on the tags if I use external links, I’ll just say you can go to /a/irwZhSf on Imgur dot com.

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nbandproud

[someone] loving [someone] tables!

I’m not sure how to describe those images, so click here for a list with most of these (with sources). The ones that aren’t there are mostly the ones based on people with binary genders, or nonbinary people in general:

men attracted at least to men = achillean

men attracted at least to nonbinary people = astroidian or adonic

men attracted at least to women = duaric

nonbinary people attracted at least to men = toric or quadrisian

nonbinary people attracted at least to nonbinary people = enbian

nonbinary people attracted at least to women = trixic or orbisian

women attracted at least to men = duaric

women attracted at least to nonbinary people = asterian or maedic

women attracted at least to women = sapphic

How to use:

1) Think about what your gender entails. For example, nonbinary woman.

2) Go to the line or one of the lines that specifies the gender you have. For nonbinary woman, you can go to nonbinary > woman or to woman > nonbinary. Both lines are the same.

3) Think about what your gender-based attraction or what you want to reveal about it entails. For example, nonbinary people and women.

4) Look for the column or columns that specify that attraction. In this case, again, you’ll have to look for either the nonbinary > woman column or the woman > nonbinary column.

5) See where the line and column cross! In this example, it should be iridian (nblnb, nblw, wlnb and wlw).

Remember you can use broader labels too! So if you are iridian, for instance, you can also use sapphic, enbian, and so on, if you want.

But how can you be both nonbinary and a man/a woman/a man and a woman?

Some nonbinary people may consider themselves one or both binary genders besides being nonbinary because:

  • They have multiple genders (at the same time or not), and one or some of them are binary or binary-adjacent; (examples: a person is trigender and their genders are man, woman and neutrois, or a person is genderfluid and their gender changes between agender and woman)
  • They have a single gender connected to one or both binary genders even if those genders aren’t binary; (examples: a person has a single gender that is a mix of maverique and woman, or a person is a proxvir, which means they have a gender similar to man but different in some way)
  • They have a certain connection to one or both binary genders because of presentation, pronouns/titles, desired transition, or other characteristics. (examples: a person is agender but doesn’t mind being treated as a man in general, or a person is dulcigender but has a connection to being a woman for desiring a physical transition similar to a trans woman)

But how can you be both a man and a woman without being nonbinary?

A nonbinary person may consider themselves both a man and a woman and prefer an identity that only talks about them being both a man and a woman.

A person who is both a man and a woman may also not want to identify as nonbinary for any reason.

But all those labels are too complicated/hard to remember! Why not just use ____?

You may not use them if you don’t want to, but there are obviously people who want to use those labels, or otherwise there wouldn’t be so much of them.

I would like to make another reminder not to reblog this post anymore, when there is a full version here. This old version sadly has less notes than the updated one, so please give it some love if you like this one.

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nbandproud

[someone] loving [someone] tables!

I’m not sure how to describe those images, so click here for a list with most of these (with sources). The ones that aren’t there are mostly the ones based on people with binary genders, or nonbinary people in general:

men attracted at least to men = achillean

men attracted at least to nonbinary people = astroidian or adonic

men attracted at least to women = duaric

nonbinary people attracted at least to men = toric or quadrisian

nonbinary people attracted at least to nonbinary people = enbian

nonbinary people attracted at least to women = trixic or orbisian

women attracted at least to men = duaric

women attracted at least to nonbinary people = asterian or maedic

women attracted at least to women = sapphic

How to use:

1) Think about what your gender entails. For example, nonbinary woman.

2) Go to the line or one of the lines that specifies the gender you have. For nonbinary woman, you can go to nonbinary > woman or to woman > nonbinary. Both lines are the same.

3) Think about what your gender-based attraction or what you want to reveal about it entails. For example, nonbinary people and women.

4) Look for the column or columns that specify that attraction. In this case, again, you’ll have to look for either the nonbinary > woman column or the woman > nonbinary column.

5) See where the line and column cross! In this example, it should be iridian (nblnb, nblw, wlnb and wlw).

Remember you can use broader labels too! So if you are iridian, for instance, you can also use sapphic, enbian, and so on, if you want.

But how can you be both nonbinary and a man/a woman/a man and a woman?

Some nonbinary people may consider themselves one or both binary genders besides being nonbinary because:

  • They have multiple genders (at the same time or not), and one or some of them are binary or binary-adjacent; (examples: a person is trigender and their genders are man, woman and neutrois, or a person is genderfluid and their gender changes between agender and woman)
  • They have a single gender connected to one or both binary genders even if those genders aren’t binary; (examples: a person has a single gender that is a mix of maverique and woman, or a person is a proxvir, which means they have a gender similar to man but different in some way)
  • They have a certain connection to one or both binary genders because of presentation, pronouns/titles, desired transition, or other characteristics. (examples: a person is agender but doesn’t mind being treated as a man in general, or a person is dulcigender but has a connection to being a woman for desiring a physical transition similar to a trans woman)

But how can you be both a man and a woman without being nonbinary?

A nonbinary person may consider themselves both a man and a woman and prefer an identity that only talks about them being both a man and a woman.

A person who is both a man and a woman may also not want to identify as nonbinary for any reason.

But all those labels are too complicated/hard to remember! Why not just use ____?

You may not use them if you don’t want to, but there are obviously people who want to use those labels, or otherwise there wouldn’t be so much of them.

For those asking if there is a term for their “someone loving someone” attraction, if it isn’t in these tables then it probably doesn’t exist yet and you should coin one!!

-Fy

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jynto

I really rather like this, so I made you all a simplified version! Some of the rows and columns are repeated in the original, so that meant I could change it from a 12x12 grid to 7x7 without losing any of the original information

Feel free to use this. No need to credit me (unless you want to).

Oooh, that’s nice! Thanks!

Just note (and I’m including @beyond-mogai-pride-flags​ here) that those terms are not all that exist anymore. I didn’t make an updated version yet because it’s too much work to redo the whole post just because of a few terms, but the version I have on my computer right now is this:

New terms are always being coined, so I’m not even sure if this is complete as of now. I recommend not trusting any sort of masterpost when researching whether a label exists or not before coining something; always search for relevant terminology on Tumblr in general and on relevant blogs instead.

Image descriptions:

There are 10 charts in the original post here by @nbandproud, one chart by @jynto as a reblog here, and a final chart by @nbandproud as the last reblog. This is a transcription of the information contained in the final chart by @nbandproud, because it contains all of the terms from the previous 11 charts. I reordered some of the information, so that it is less repetitive when in text format.

Achillean = mlm. personal identity is (at least) man, and attracted to men. 

Asterosian = mlm and mlnb. personal identity is (at least) man, and attracted to men and nonbinary people.

Astroidian or Adonic = mlnb.  personal identity is (at least) man, and attracted to nonbinary people.

Duaric = mlw or wlm. personal identity is (at least) man, and attracted to women. or, personal identity is (at least) woman, and attracted to men.

Azurian = nblm and mlm. personal identity is (at least) man and/or nonbinary, and attracted to men.

Opalian = mlm, mlnb, nblm, nblnb. personal identity is (at least) man and/or nonbinary, and attracted to men. or, personal identity is (at least) man and/or nonbinary, and attracted to nonbinary people.

Courscatian = nblm, nblnb, nblw, mlm, mlw, mlnb. personal identity is (at least) man and/or nonbinary, and attracted to women and nonbinary people. or,  personal identity is (at least) man and/or nonbinary, and attracted to men and women. or, personal identity is (at least) man and/or nonbinary, and attracted to men and nonbinary people.

Turquoian = nblnb and mlnb. personal identity is (at least) man and/or nonbinary, and attracted to nonbinary people.

Spinelian = mlnb, nblnb, mlw, nblw. personal identity is (at least) man and/or nonbinary, and attracted to nonbinary people and/or women.

Umbalian = nblw and mlw. personal identity is (at least) man and/or nonbinary, and attracted to women.

Anfisian = wlw, wlm, mlm, mlw. personal identity is (at least) man and/or woman, and attracted to men and/or women.

Aurian = nblw, nblm, wlw, wlm, mlm, mlw. personal identity is (at least) man and/or woman and/or nonbinary, and attracted to men and/or women. 

Labradorian = mlm, mlnb, wlm, wlnb, nblm, nblnb. personal identity is (at least) man and/or woman and/or nonbinary, and attracted to men and/or nonbinary people.

Pearlian = wlm, wlw, wlnb, mlm, mlnb, mlw, nblm, nblw, nblnb. personal identity is (at least) man and/or woman and/or nonbinary, and attracted to men and/or women and/or nonbinary people.

Toric or quadrisian = nblm. personal identity is (at least) nonbinary, and attracted to men.

Versian or Jaspian = nblw, nblnb, nblm. personal identity is (at least) nonbinary, and attracted to men and/or women and/or nonbinary people.

Enbian = nblnb. personal identity is (at least) nonbinary, and attracted to nonbinary people.

Trixic or orbisian =  nblw. personal identity is (at least) nonbinary, and attracted to women.

Aventurian = nblnb, nblm, wlnb, wlm. personal identity is (at least) nonbinary and/or woman, and attracted to men and/or nonbinary people.

Luminian = nblw, nblnb, nblm, wlw, wlm, wlnb. personal identity is (at least) nonbinary and/or woman, and attracted to men and/or women and/or nonbinary people.

Iridian = wlw, wlnb, nblnb, nblw. personal identity is (at least) nonbinary and/or woman, and attracted to nonbinary people and/or women.

Citrinian = wlnb, wlm. personal identity is (at least) woman, and attracted to nobinary people and/or men.

Asterian or Maedic = wlnb. personal identity is (at least) woman, and attracted to nobinary people.

Agatic = wlnb and wlw. personal identity is (at least) woman, and attracted to nobinary people and/or women.

Sapphic = wlw. personal identity is (at least) woman, and attracted to women.

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This just confused me more as to my sexuality😂. All i know is I’m uncomfortable talking about my gender because someone I know, knows my Tumblr. And that I show attraction twards all genders. Does that make me pansexual?

You don’t need to use these terms at all; even if someone can say they are just sapphic or just versian, most of these terms are meant to be complementary to other terms that are more specific or less specific.

If you are attracted to all genders/regardless of gender, you may just identify as pan. You may also want to say you are pluralian, omni, bi, ply (poly- if you are using is as a prefix, such as in polysexual or polyromantic), or other m-spec labels. But you are free to choose whichever labels you want, as long as they fit you in some way.

There’s also femaric (LGBTQIAPN+ person attracted at least to women), mascic (LGBTQIAPN+ person attracted at least to men) and enboric (LGBTQIAPN+ person attracted at least to nonbinary people), which don’t specify your own gender, or other genders you are attracted to. But, again, you don’t need to use those labels if you feel like pan is enough.

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Do you have resources on nonbinary men specifically? I'm trying to find info on it.

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I’m not sure of what kind of resources you want?

A nonbinary man is, usually, someone who does feel a connection to maleness and/or masculinity in some way, but who doesn’t completely identify as a [binary] man.

Some examples of people who may consider themselves nonbinary men are:

  • People who feel like they are partly, but not wholly, men; for instance, someone who is 15% a man and 85% genderless, or someone who is 70% a man and 30% a woman
  • People who don’t feel like they are binary at all, but who don’t mind being considered men with regards to attraction, transition, day-to-day life and/or so on to make things easier and/or because they identify with some ideas related to maleness and/or masculinity
  • People who are men, but feel alienated from the idea of being binary men because of some other identity they have, or because they feel like they interpret being a man in a way that’s different from what their society considers a man
  • People who are men some/most of the time, but not always; such as a genderfluid person who is usually a man but who sometimes has other/no gender(s)
  • People whose genders are a blend between man and something else
  • People who feel like their gender is close to that of a binary man’s, but just the label man on it’s own doesn’t fit
  • People who are nonbinary and masculine and prefer to say they are nonbinary men instead of using masculine-specific labels (such as mingender or ceteromasculine)
  • People who are proxvirs, demimen, quivermen, neuvirs, nixvirs, melles, neuromen, agender men, genderless men, genderflux men, demifluid men, duramen, androxes, xoys and other identities that mean you are a man in some way

It’s worth noting that not all people who use those labels and/or have these experiences use the label of nonbinary man. This list just means they theoretically could. And there are probably other reasons people identify as nonbinary men I don’t know of/don’t remember right now.

It may also be worth noting nonbinary men may use any pronouns sets they want, and may have had any gender assignment at birth.

I sadly can’t source these, since they come with personal experience from reading about experiences and the ways people use labels. The nonbinary man and nonbinary boy tags are full of general nonbinary/transmasculine/transgender posts with the occasional selfie, so I can’t link to anything, and most sites’ definitions of nonbinary man are either vague or lacking, imho.

I sent some messages to group chats I’m in, to see if there’s any nonbinary man/boy I can forward further questions to. If someone takes the offer, I’ll tag them on a reply to this post. I’m not a nonbinary man/boy myself, after all.

If any follower is a NB man/boy and wants to offer their help as well, feel free to reply!

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