NEW BLOG

ALRIGHT GUYS.

So here is my new blog. It’s set and done. 

You can follow me there and feel free to unfollow this blog.

I will not post on this again.

HERE

NEW BLOG

ALRIGHT GUYS.

So here is my new blog. It’s set and done. 

You can follow me there and feel free to unfollow this blog.

I will not post on this again.

HERE

It hurt that Josh thought Chris hated him. It hurt that she thought any of them hated him- sure, Emily wasn’t his biggest fan and Mike had made comments alluding to not exactly loving Josh, but they all wanted to get better. They all wanted him to be better, too. 

“Josh, he doesn’t hate you,” she said softly, though she couldn’t meet his eye. Oddly, she felt like she might cry. “You’re still his best friend.” 

It was weird, to be sitting across from the person that had caused her nightmares, that had put her through hell, and feel nothing but compassion for him. She knew that the old Josh was in there, somewhere. 

“And Sam… She misses you so much. She was really mad for a really long time, don’t get me wrong, but I think now she just misses you.” 

Ash sighed, and loosened her grip on Josh’s hand slightly. “If you aren’t up for seeing them yet, that’s okay. If you are, I can go with you, if you want. Or… I could give them updates. If you wouldn’t mind that. Every once in a while I could just let them know how you’re doing.” She paused, realizing the implications of that. “That is, if you wouldn’t mind seeing me again? I think it might be nice. I missed hanging out with you.” 

She really hadn’t expected to feel so calm, sitting face to face with the star of her recurring night terrors, let alone want to see him regularly. And though when she’d first received that text, her hands shook and her breath caught, now she was okay. Seeing him in person had flipped a switch in her brain. 

Ashley seemed to hesitate for a bit after his question, and though it was annoying for Josh, the little voices in his head beginning to come back and tell him that she was thinking of a good lie... He knew that wasn’t true and that she was just thinking of an answer. He couldn’t let the voices take over again. No, not when someone tries to keep in touch with him - To be with him again. That’s all he could have ever asked for.

It’s like a massive weight was pulled off of Josh’s heart when Ashley spoke up, saying Chris didn’t hate him. He gulped, processing the information. Then think about it. It’s been more than six months. Chris had been calling him since the first three or four days. Some joined in much later. His breath caught up in his lungs and he felt tears well up in his eyes at her next words. He is still your best friend. Sam misses you.

He just heard of the three most important people to him - One sitting right in front of him, holding onto his hand. Real, alive, safe, and maybe a tiny bit less broken. Then, the girl continued even more, and Josh had to think. Is he up for seeing them? ...No. He’s still under a shock of meeting Ashley for the first time, he wasn’t absolutely ready to meet his other friends as well. The tiniest shake of his head, a bit more thinking time.

        “I guess-- Well I think not yet. I will... See them later and... Probably contact them once, but I don’t feel like.. Coming out to more people than just you, if you get me, Ash..? Though.. I would be grateful if you could reassure them that I was... Yeah. Alive.” He mumbled, and at her next words he wanted to immediately say yes, maybe a little too soon, but he held himself back, clearing his throat to hold back another wave of tears. She was welcoming him back. She would be able to meet him up more and have him back in her life.

         “Yeah- Sure. I could do that. .......I missed you too.” He started on a confident voice, but ended up whisper-mumbling the following again. No. He really did miss Ash.

“Do you realize that we are two weeks into summer vacation and we haven’t done anything remotely exciting? We’re ruining our own reputation, bro. We’re tarnishing the Washington name.”

     “I know, bro! It’s worrying, and upsetting at the same time. What have we become? Are we turning 21 and soon turning into grandfathers with no humor? Hells no! ...Listen Joshua we gotta step up our game!” Joe started on. It was unlikely to the Washington brothers to make no prank, to bother no water. Maybe it was even suspicious? 

      “They must be thinking we’re preparing for our biggest prank, dude! We’ve been going on so long without it, we gotta come up with something”

Send 🌑 to crawl into bed with my muse

     “ Not dreaming..! ” She mumbled into his shoulder, shaking her head before leaning back and catching any tears that fell in a delayed timeframe. For a moment the redhead took him in, examining him with soft eyes before smiling sincerley. This was definitely Josh. The Josh she knew and loved. 

     “ I-It’s alright…you’re here now, you’re real an’ your safe an’…an’ you are frickin’ real… ” Her voice got choked up because she had believed him to be dead or to have ended with a fate WORSE than death. 

     “ Y-Yeah, alright… ” The redhead glanced up at the male once more, not only to check he was still there, but for the sole factor that he has been busy. How long had he been back? How long was he going to take to tell them? How long was he going to take to tell her?

      “Would that be physically possible? If so, I gotta figure out how.” Josh teased, enjoying the way he could make her giggle after the crying. Even if he knew part of the reason she cried was happiness he never wanted to see Ashley cry once again. Something, some force he didn't know made him want to protect her from now - Pay more attention and love to her from now on.

      "Not at all." Josh said on a soft voice then, just staring down at her with a loving, careful, soft glance. He let her do the same - It must have been incredible to her to see him after two years... It was for his mom too, in the first weeks. He let her take it in. Take him in.

Josh nodded along with what she said about him being safe, alive and real, but didn't say a word. He felt the questioning glance of the girl on himself and he bit on the inside of his cheek lightly. This wasn't going to be an easy ride. Probably later.

     “Let's make some warm tea then-- Then I will tell you everything, alright?" He chose, turning to the kitchen counter to put water in the boiler and get some teabags.