youre so fuckign right

not to be all i told you so about ancestry tests but 23 and me went bankrupt and can now legally sell human genetic information to the highest bidder, as per their privacy policy which was signed by approx. 15 million test takers

For anyone who needs it

Incredibly fucking slow at it 🤧

i fixed it

I've never drawn in the pokemon style, but I had to, no control

The plains spadefoot (Spea bombifrons) is toadally cute. But did you know that this stout amphibian, which inhabits arid regions of western North America, is an “explosive” breeder? Hundreds of individuals gather en masse to mate. Afterwards, females can lay as many as 2,000 eggs! These eggs might hatch in as few as two days, and the resulting tadpoles can develop rapidly, sometimes maturing in just 13 days. This species reproduces after warm heavy rains.

Photo: Andrew DuBois, CC BY-NC 2.0, flickr

I don't know which of you needs to hear this but "narc" is not short for "narcissist" when someone calls you a "narc" for snitching they are calling you a "narcotics officer"

technically narc isnt even short for narcotics officer its just cant for Cop, I believe Roma in origin

I read years ago in a book that it was derived from nakk, Romani for nose, as in someone who always has their nose in other people's business

ITS DERIVED FROM "NARCO" AS IN "NARCOTICS" WHAT FUCKING BOOK

Okay you know what pulling back on my derision because i can see how this mistake would be made but narc and nark are etymologically unrelated

Etymology is always doing some shit like this

It took me forever to work on in short bursts while still injured, but sometimes and idea just sinks its teeth into you and won't let go. 🦁

Counter argument: Immortal, invisible, malevolent mouse

Ring slips around mouse’s neck and is gone.

The rest of the movie is just the 9 Nazgul trying to capture the mouse while the eye of Sauron watches an extended game of Mouse Trap unfolding before him.

Nailed it

I was walking through the toy aisle at Target when I found this thing and had a VIOLENT AND IMMEDIATE FLASHBACK to when JP first came out and they had a bunch of REALLY COOL T Rex toys that I would have sold one of my scrawny small-child limbs for but my mother wouldn’t get me one because they were “too violent and also ate people” :(

hnn I WANT IT SO BAD

on closer inspection, it makes a lot of really obnoxious noises and is also Too Expensive. BUT FEAR NOT I found this slightly smaller dude wedged in the back!

IT HAS BITE ACTION, AND THAT’S THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS

now we enter the testing phase

yup. looks good.

Extreme Chompin T-Rex says IT’S NEVER TOO LATE TO FOLLOW YOUR DREAMS

Can we take a moment to appreciate that we can use this as a rosetta stone to say “EXTREME CHOMPIN’ “ in four languages?

OH SHIT YOU’RE RIGHT, let me check the garbage to see if it’s still there! hopefully I didn’t destroy it in my excitement

*roar sound effect*

IMPORTANT UPDATE:

update update: I re-sized her collar and found a bag of toy bones at the craft store. I haven’t put this much effort into a non-school thing since my last job search, help

(secret bonus: the other side of her tag)

There’s more!

I love.

I saw that people are reblogging the thread again, so I thought I’d give you all an update on how Wexter is doing!

(just fine)

Wexter And The Case Of Her Continuing Marvelously Naughty Garden Adventures

OP and Wexter can break all my toes and I would still send a thank you card

Wexter says SHE WOULD NEVER DO SUCH A THING (but she might chew your ankles a little bit maybe)

so it’s come to my attention that at some point this weekend Wexter blew past 100,000 notes, and I for one think that’s very cash money of her.

it’s been a few weeks, I suppose we should check up on the AHSGSHGAFB?!

ajdhf.

well that’s just,,,

REXCELLENT

HELL

YES

HELL

FUCKING

YES.

Nearing on 375K Notes!!! What in the Paleolithic are y'all gonna do when they top 400K?!

cry, probably

Reblogging to get you one note closer to crossing the 400k mark!

IT’S TIME

YOU MANIACS. okay, here we go!

HAIL TO THE QUEEN

LONG MAY SHE REIGN!

(she was a skater Rex, she said see you later Rex, she’s finally hit 400k!)

we’re coming to you live from Halloween 2022, where Wexter continues to be ridiculously jawsome!

this year we’re doing a much-beloved character from classic literature, “Dracula with inappropriate straw hat”

thanks everyone, may your weens be hollow and your candy be many!

hey! HEY. it’s Halloween 2023! AND YOU’LL NEVER GUESS WHAT WEXTER IS DRESSED UP AS THIS YEAR.

she’s… (WEXTER! here girl!) she’s a… a…..

she’s a T. Rex.

GOTTEM!

Halloween 2024.

ERASERHEAD BABY.

ohshit

we have to get wexter to 1 mil right

Hey did you know there's a tell all book about the behind the scenes of Meta and the author is forbidden from promoting it?

The good news is however that it's already published and can't be stifled and whoever didn't sign the NDA can promote it as much as they want.

She's not allowed to promote it?

Well then, I guess we'll have to do it for her.

It's available from bookshop.org and Barnes & Noble in hardcover, ebook, and audiobook. It's on the front page of the B&N website and they're advertising $5 currently.

Also request it at your local library if they don't already have a copy!

My local library's catalog. Zuck clearly didn't do a very good job trying to hide it. Streisand effect and so on.

Well, well, well... looks like I'm not the only one interested in what they've been hiding.

it'd be really cool if everyone put their money where their mouths are and went and saw the new fully 2d animated looney tunes movie that's in theaters RIGHT NOW instead of continuing to scream about the snow white and lilo and stitch remakes

you guys LOVE theatrical 2d animation, right? you're utterly drained by the live action remake trend? you wanna at least try to participate in the effort to bring it back into the limelight in a non-anime context? here's your chance. go see "the day the earth blew up: a looney tunes movie" at your nearest theater.

guys wouldn't it be sooo funny if we not only saw this opening weekend but saw it again the day the snow white reboot released and out-grossed it. wouldnt that be so fucking funny. piss off WB corporate (who tried to can the movie like they did everything else) AND disney corporate. wouldnt that be funny

HEY! YOU THERE! WANT TO PLAY A TABLETOP ADVENTURE WITH A PROFESSIONAL STORYTELLER?

I'M MISTER TORGUE, AND THE NERD WHO HELPS ME LOG INTO THIS ACCOUNT ASKED ME TO DO AN AD FOR HIS SERVICES. I TOLD HIM I WOULD, BUT ONLY IF I GOT TO WRITE IT MYSELF. SO STRAP IN, DUMPSUCKS. IT'S PRODUCT PLACEMENT TIME:

--

THEN YOU NEED BENCOMPETENCE, PROFESSIONAL STORYTELLER AND GAME MASTER.

BRAOOWWWWW-CHICKABRAOW EXPLOSION NOISE HEREEEEEEEE!

BENCOMPETENCE HAS RUN OVER 800 PROFESSIONAL SESSIONS OF TABLETOP GAMES, INCLUDING DUNGEONS & DRAGONS, CITY OF MIST, THIRSTY SWORD LESBIANS, AND MORE. HE HAS OVER ONE-HUNDRED 5-STAR REVIEWS FROM HIS CLIENTS, WHICH IS PROBABLY MORE THAN 12 MAYBE.

NOT ONLY DOES BEN OWN A PAIR OF CAT-EAR HEADPHONES, HE EXCELS AT RIPPING YOUR HEART STRAIGHT OUT OF ITS RIBCAGE USING NOTHING BUT COMPELLING, ROMANCEABLE CHARACTERS AND BADASS EPIC ADVENTURES. IN FACT, EVEN HIS VILLAINS ARE SEXY AS F*CK. JUST CHECK OUT THIS VAMPIRE FROM ONE OF HIS CAMPAIGNS:

THIS MURDER MOMMY IS ABSOLUTELY ABOUT TO KILL ME AND MY ONLY RESPONSE WILL BE TO THANK HER. HER NAME IS THE COUNTESS STRAHD AND SHE IS COLD AS SHE IS HOT. TEMPERATURE PUNS!!!

NOT YOUR STYLE?!?! WE RESPECT YOUR PREFERENCES AND HUMBLY RECOMMEND AVELINE BAMBRIDGE.

AVELINE'S AN AVID MASK COLLECTOR, ARCANE WAR CRIMINAL, AND FIERCE ADVOCATE OF WOMEN'S WRONGS. YOU CAN MEET HER IN MASKS OF AVELINE.

OR MAYBE YOU WANT TO EXERCISE YOUR GOD-GIVEN RIGHT TO BE THE BADDIE ALL BY YOURSELF???!?? THEN IT'S TIME TO SOLVE SOME MAGICAL NOIR CRIMES, MOTHERF*CKER.

BECOME A DETECTIVE INFUSED WITH THE MYTH OF YOUR CHOICE IN CITY OF MIST.

THIS ONE GIVES YOU MAGIC POWERS AND PLOT TWISTS, AND IT ALSO TALKS ABOUT THE WEATHER IN THE TITLE SO YOU KNOW IT'S DEEP AS SH*T.

OR MAYBE YOU'RE SAYING "F*CK READING, I WANT TO DO CRIMES AND BLOW UP SH*T". AND IF YOU SAID THAT, PLEASE CALL ME SO THAT WE CAN HANG OUT SOMETIME.

BUT ALSO CONSIDER JOINING OUTLAWS OF ALKENSTAR, A PATHFINDER ADVENTURE THAT FEELS LIKE THE CHAOS AND HILARITY OF THAT ONE VIDEO GAME YOU KNOW ME FROM, BORDER BREAK.

BENCOMPETENCE'S GAMES ARE INCLUSIVE AF AND BEGINNER-FRIENDLY, SO NEWCOMERS AND VETERANS WILL BOTH FEEL RIGHT AT HOME. THE ONLY THING THAT MATTERS IS THAT YOU GET IN THERE AND KICK THE NARRATIVE'S ASS RIGHT IN ITS D*CK.

HE ALSO ASKED ME TO TELL YOU THAT SESSION 0'S ARE FREE. BUT I DON'T KNOW WHAT THIS MEANS, BECAUSE I REFUSE TO LEARN ANY NUMBERS INVENTED AFTER 4TH CENTURY B.C.

WANT TO JOIN A TABLE? THEN LISTEN UP, F*CKTRUCKS, BECAUSE IT'S LIST TIME:

THERE'S A LOT MORE TO SAY, BUT THE NERD WRITING THIS SCRIPT STARTED TALKING ABOUT CHARACTER SHEETS AND SOMETHING CALLED NARRATIVE AGENCY, SO I HAD TO BEAT HIM WITH A FOLDING CHAIR UNTIL HE STOPPED. YOU CAN HELP PAY FOR THE BODYCAST I PUT HIM IN BY SIGNING UP TODAY!

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Discussing baby’s future

They are both doing the "I want" chitter. They very much want to get up, but they have a sleeping baby cuddling with them. They must endure, but they will not be silent about it

Well well well, kitties. Looks like you want to get up but there's a little cat on you so you can't. Very frustrating situation there, can't imagine the burden of being held down by a little adorable kittycat. Couldn't, as the kids say, be me.

How are my sweetie pees

I Said How The Fuck Are My Fucking Sweetie Pees

Body type and shape

Lean Having a slender and toned body with minimal body fat.

Muscular Having well-developed muscles and a defined physique.

Slender Having a thin and graceful body shape.

Curvy Having an hourglass figure with well-defined curves, particularly in the hips and bust.

Athletic Having a fit and muscular body, often associated with participation in sports or physical activities.

Petite Being small and slender in stature, usually referring to height and overall body size.

Voluptuous Having full and shapely curves, often emphasizing a larger bust, hips, and thighs.

Stocky Having a compact and solid build with a sturdy appearance.

Thin Having a slim and slender body shape with little body fat or muscle definition.

Well-proportioned Having balanced and harmonious body proportions, with each body part in good proportion to the whole.

Toned Having firm muscles and a defined physique resulting from regular exercise and strength training.

Chubby Having a plump or rounded body shape, often with excess body fat.

Pear-shaped Having a body shape where the hips and thighs are wider than the shoulders and bust.

Hourglass figure Having a curvy body shape characterized by a well-defined waist and proportionate bust and hips.

Apple-shaped Having a body shape where weight is primarily carried around the midsection, resulting in a broader waistline.

Broad-shouldered Having wide and well-developed shoulders in comparison to the rest of the body.

Long-limbed Having long and slender limbs in proportion to the body.

Stout Having a sturdy and robust build, often characterized by a solid and thick physique.

Plump Having a pleasantly full and rounded body shape, often indicating a higher percentage of body fat.

Tall and slender Being tall in height and having a slim and elongated body shape.