[oh no, am I the drama😈 I think I’m the drama. This is apart of my love on tour series, sorry not sorry. ]
“Five years?” You choke out walking into Harry’s office in his New York penthouse. Harry looks up from his laptop with shocked eyes. The realization settles in, his Marvel partnership got released. He closes his laptop slowly, rising from his chair cautiously.
“Five years?” You repeat voice rising.
“Can we just sit dow-“ He tries.
“No! How could you just do something like this and not talk to me about it?” Harry is taken aback not feeling like he has to reason with you.
“This is my career! I don’t have to hold back on anything.” He snaps. He leans forward on his hands that rest on the desk. You both glare at each other- tension forming.
“This is our relationship you prick! We are going to get married and now I’m reading that you’re going to be filming on and off in Australia?” Your phone with the news article is clutched tight in your hands.
“It’s no big deal, you’ll just come with me.”
You scoff, “I’ll come with you? I’m supposed to give up my life to watch you act in another country? Do you hear yourself?”
“Im not going to argue with you about this shit. I have a career to maintain. I wish you would be a little more supportive.” His eyes drop, sadness creeping up his throat.
“I am supportive!” Your defense came out quick, offended that he would say something so dumb. “So supportive that I dropped everything to come on tour with you!”
“Then why are you in here yelling at me? Why aren’t you happy for me?” He yells, face red with rage. That fury attacks you in full force making you flinch at his tone.
“Fine Harry. Tell me this then. When you accepted the offer did you think about our wedding or marriage? Did you think about our lives together? Our conversations of buying a new house and settling down? I know you’re a celebrity and you have dreams but what about me? What about my dreams? Why are you the only one in this relationship who can have the things they want?” Your tone is low, not matching is sweltering anger. “Why are we getting married if you can’t even discuss life altering things like this with me?”
Harry is left quiet, leaving you time to leave his office and slam the door behind you. You storm down the hall and Into your bedroom, your chest burning with the onslaught of emotions that were taking over your mental state.
You go to your side of the bed, your side of the bed where you’ve planted the roots of your being in this mans house. A picture frame of you two hugging sat on the nightstand next to your pill case and tpwk water bottle. In the drawers of the night stand were some of your magazines and a spare inhaler for Harry just in case he had an emergency. On the bed was a king size fluffy blanket that you often found your self burrowed under, when you are in New York, with Harry lying right beside you.
The bedroom smelled of you two. Harry’s oak smelling cologne and your warm vanilla body oils that Harry stole sometimes so he could smell like you.
This was a apart of your life with Harry. Your life with Harry. A life that he seemingly never wrote you into. Five years was a long amount of time for Harry to plan into the future. Did he fit a wedding into that five year plan? A baby? What about your home?
The bed calls to you to lie in it, and you do. Something settled into your stomach pulling you deep into your bed. It wasnt often that your depression got triggered by something, your anxiety was something that was easily triggered. Something about the way that Harry moved ten steps in front of you instead of walking alongside you made you feel low.
It was hours since your argument. Harry normally would go and comfort you immediately but today, he didnt feel like he was on the wrong side of the argument. He doesn't understand why you are being so pragmatic about this decision. Youre acting as If he won't take you along with him.
Deciding that he was done with the avoidance, he walks from the office into the bedroom. The room was illuminated by the slowly descending sun. He could see your body laying under the covers and you scrolling through your phone.
He stepped past the door to end of the bed where your feet lay. You curl your legs up making room for him to sit down.
“Are you ok?” He ask quietly.
“No.” Your tone was short. Harry’s head drops, annoyance running in his blood.
“Why are you being like this? I signed an amazing deal to improve my life, our life!” He snaps. You sit up in the bed looking at Harry as if he lost his mind.
“You signed an amazing deal? You signed a deal without any discussion with your future wife! We discussed marriage, finishing tour, children, not five years of filming.” Your voice is low, every word punctuated with fierceness.
“Why cant you just let me have this?”
“You have everything!” You explode. The anger reached its peak, burning, bubbling, and crackling to overflow from the volcano of emotions you are feeling. “You have everything. You have millions of fans, millions of dollars, you have me! What about me Harry.”
You start to cry. Anger simmering into sadness. Why wasn’t he hearing you?
“Im going to do this Y/N.” He finally says. “This is a big moment for my career. It could do so much for me.”
“And what about me? What about the life we were planning?” You sob. Harry feels bad now. His heart clenches at every tear drop that fall off of your face.
“We could move everything back?” Wrong answer.
“You want to move having a baby back? For your career?” You gasp. Harry shuts his eyes tight trying to form the right words. He leans forward to rest his elbows in his knees. “Do you hear yourself?”
It’s quiet again, the space only being filled with the sounds of your crying and Harry’s hammering heart.
He sits up looking at you. “I love you, I do, but I need this for me. I need you to want this for me.”
He’s desperate, grasping at straws.
“Fuck you Harry.” You spit untangling yourself from your blankets. You stand in a hurry rushing into the closet to find your travel suitcase. Harry stands quickly following you. You pack away your clothes haphazardly.
“What-what are you doin? Your leaving because of what? Please talk to me.” Harry felt nervous watching you cry over the suitcase. You stand standing parallel to him.
“I won’t come second. I’ve done it for year and I can’t do it anymore. Since One Direction I have come second. We haven’t gotten engaged because I waited for you to find a good place in your career, we haven’t even discussed a baby because I know you’re too distracted with every other thing! I’m sick of it.” You yell. Frustration seeped out through the tone of your voice.
“So what do you want to do then? We aren’t going anywhere and I can’t back out of this deal.” He inquires with a calm tone.
With shaky hands your hand hand goes to your left hand slowly pulling the ring off. Harry feels himself become sick.
“No please.” You only nod taking his hand and placing the ring in his palm.
“I love you but we are going in circles. Im not saying we should be done forever but maybe we need a little break.” You whisper. Hot tears roll down both of your faces.
“Why though? We’re ok? We’re ok.” Harry cries.
“Just a little break, I need to think and- and you have a show that you have to fly out to tonight. I’m going to stay at my moms back home and when we are ready- we will talk.”
This wasn’t something you expected to happen. You expected to be on the same page as Harry, after both the us and international tours were done- you and Harry would start your new life. There was going to be a wedding and a baby and a new house and now there seems to be nothing.
