@ashesoreillyapologist / ashesoreillyapologist.tumblr.com
*tilts your chin down gently so u r looking in my eyes* ok just hear me out. you don’t need to be afraid of ghosts they’re not scary i swear. they’re just people. not even, actually. they’re the remnants that people left behind. the least Supernatural of all the Supernatural. i don’t mean that as a bad thing i love ghosts. it’s more that any human is capable of dying and staying behind. it’s fine. we’re all just ghosts waiting to be freed from the prison of Life and Meat.
For those of you interested, the youtube channel Ask A Mortician does a lot of videos on taboo death subjects, answers questions and is a huge advocate for natural burials and being present during the actual funeral process so you don’t get taken advantage of by the funeral industry. She’s one of my favourite youtubers and I highly recommend her videos.
I’m not OP, but as a fellow Ask a Mortician fan (I’m even on the Patreon, Caitlyn is out here doing G-d’s work), HERE IS AN UPDATE:
—cremation and burial are not your only options. Some states now offer aquamation (basically your body is put in a special brine that breaks it down into nothing in a few hours) and terramation (aka human composting; your body is put into a dedicated pod with plant matter that accelerates the decay process and turns you into nutrient-rich soil in about six weeks). You also have the option to donate your body to a body farm or medical school. Check your state’s or country’s laws, and if you don’t see the option you want, contact the Order of the Good Death to find out who’s advocating in your area. If the answer is nobody, YOU can always be the person who starts the ball rolling.
—“bury your cremains in this fancy urn and you’ll become a tree!” is a scam. Cremains contain no organic matter. If you want to be a tree, go for terramation or natural burial.
—“turn your loved one’s cremains into a diamond!” is a scam. While you can technically turn cremains into a zircon (artificial diamond), the result is likely to be EXTREMELY ugly due to the amount of inclusions. If you want to wear a loved one’s cremains as a memento mori, you’re far better off speaking to an artisan jeweler about getting a modern version of one of the glass rings or pendants that were popular in the Victorian era. There are likeminded people out there who will absolutely do this for you in a beautiful and compassionate way, but the “it’s diamonds!” techbro startup thing is not the way to go.
—what is and is not respectful to the dead will vary based on culture, but the one constant should be consent of the deceased. What do THEY want to happen to their body? Have this conversation with your loved ones while they’re alive, and make sure the answers are written down. I know my sister wants a traditional Jewish burial—“just put me in the dirt and forget about it,” in her words—and she knows I want to be terramated. I know my dad wants to be buried next to my mom, although I need to check in with him if he wants his body buried or if he wants to be cremated first. Destigmatize this talk. It doesn’t have to be uncomfortable—making sure your loved ones know exactly what you want takes a burden off them in the future, and making sure YOU know what THEY want will both help you when the time comes and provide the comfort of knowing you’ve fulfilled their wishes.
And finally:
The reason I’m such a staunch Caitlyn evangelist is because there is a nonzero chance one of her videos saved my life. My mom died sometime in the night between the first and second of January, 2021. Because travel for large amounts of people was off the table, my dad opted for two small funerals—one here with a funeral home that refused to handle her body without a showing (unfortunately this was part of Covid price gouging—there was literally nowhere else capable of taking her), and one with our proper family funeral home in our hometown. Because of Covid, this meant it took A FUCKING MONTH for my mother to be buried, and that shit is absolutely scarring. I’d recently watched Caitlyn’s “what does a full embalming look like” video, and her partner for that video said she likes to bring the family in to assist in helping with the deceased person’s hair, makeup, clothing, any part of the process they’re willing to do, because she feels it helps with the grieving process. I was ready to grasp at anything that would let me feel like my mother wasn’t stuck in an episode of American Horror Story, especially after the shitshow that was the funeral home here in Arizona. With this in mind I called the family funeral home and asked to do my mom’s makeup; while I personally shudder at the thought of a traditional American burial, it’s what she wanted. Nancy—our family’s mortician for the last 40 years—readily agreed.
And so I went in, put on some of my mom’s favorite old country singers, and did her makeup exactly the way she taught me when I was sixteen, with her own cosmetics instead of what the funeral home had on hand. Her hair was thin and fragile from her last illness and I couldn’t curl it, but I fixed it up as well as I could, and painted her nails.
And let me tell you something.
The other mortician lady was right.
It was a massive comfort to me when Nancy took one look at my mom and said “oh, when you said she did her makeup differently you were right. I never would have guessed to do this.” (I don’t know where my mom learned to put on blusher, but she did basically the exact opposite of every makeup tutorial I’ve ever seen, and her method of doing eyeshadow was extremely 1940s.) Every single person at the service kept saying she looked exactly like they remembered from so-and-so’s wedding, such-and-such’s graduation, this-and-that’s honorary party. It wasn’t a vague “oh she looks so good”—she looked LIKE HER to those who remembered her. People who knew I’d done her makeup said they could tell it had to be someone who’d known her well. I remembered her horror at seeing unfamiliar makeup on her own mother’s face, and it was a massive comfort to me to know she was turned out exactly as she would have liked. And my dad? My dad hadn’t even cried yet. But he cried when he saw her in the same makeup style she’d worn at their wedding. He was finally able to cry and connect to my mom, his wife and beloved, and begin to find closure, seeing the woman he knew instead of a tired, worn body that bore little resemblance to her. It mattered. To him, to me, to my mom’s friends. It mattered a lot.
I don’t know that I would have ended up suicidal if not for that hour alone with my mom and Charley Pride and a stack of Bare Minerals compacts. But her death hit me hard and the month that followed was a special circle of hell, and I think I might have. Every time I think of her death and her burial, I think of that video and I’m insanely grateful it exists. (Incidentally, Nancy agreed. She said she thought she might make it an option for other families, after seeing both my response and the response of others in our family circle.)
Caitlyn knows her stuff. Watch, learn your rights, teach others to be death-positive. Life is the only occupation with a 100% mortality rate, so we might as well do it the way we want.
What are we measuring here, bestie?
Sorry @delightedcrow this can’t remain hidden in the notes you are too correct
gf was talking about how eden golan's performance always strikes a chord because of the grief in it, and how terrible it's been that from the start that israelis have been told they're not allowed to grieve. how important it is that she's doing it anyway.
and that's the heart of the hate directed at her:
how dare you grieve publicly? how dare you remind us that you're human, after we've collectively decided to dehumanize you?
I appreciate the sound effects they added in.
he's all in
he’s all in
he's all in
“Stop bullying the poor girl! This isn’t her fault!”
Like, she is literally bragging that she is a propaganda act and will be in Rafah days from now soon doing genocide concerts.
"will be in Rafah days from now soon doing genocide concerts" sjdhfbdsh these ppl r so detached from reality babygorl shes going to be a משקית ממטרות at best with a רובאי מינוס 9 in the קרייה jhsadbfhjdsfb I love this style of fantasyposting conjoined with schizoposting
A friend of mine was in the band. I suppose made a notch in her French horn for every Palestinian she toot-tooted at, because that is clearly how the IDF works.
she'll probably take the talent route like noa kirel and mergui
"genocide concerts" I'm wheezing 😂
These people really have no idea how an army works, huh? They just say the most unhinged fictional nonsense.
Every Israeli child who reaches 18 is drafted to the army by law (or goes to jail). Eden Golan doesn't really have a choice.
Besides, the idf has special jobs that are considered pacifistic, for soldiers who don't want to fight for whatever personal/idealistic reasons (I knew a soldier who due to ideology refused to hold a gun, and was given a job as helping citizens shield from missiles). Jobs like paramedics and medical staff, who not only treat soldiers, but also Israeli and Palestinian citizens (and they often find themselves giving medical care to Bedouins in the south, or to Gazans in the borders)... Also jobs like military firefighters and rescue crews, who 90% of the time are just helping the normal firefighters rescue citizens From buildings (and some of them also fly abroad to help countries during natural disasters)... Also army teachers, who are sent to schools in poor towns, to help the youth learn for their diploma for free... And also... Y'know... Army band players, singers and theatre actors, like our girl Eden wants to be.
And yes, Eden's participation in the Eurovision was indeed a part of a very important mission: showing the world that the existence of Israelis and Jews isn't political.
The Israeli government sucks, that's true, but that doesn't mean that the 9 million citizens of this country shouldn't be allowed to simply exist like everyone else. This last year Israelis and jews were excluded from international academies, science projects, art projects and performances, simply because of their nationality and religion.
People always say that the Eurovision shouldn't be political, and yet also claim that Eden shouldn't participate in it... and that makes no sense. Eden is a person, not an institution, not a government, not an army, just a person. Her existence, her art and her talent aren't political. And she went up on that stage, under literal death threats, and delivered the most beautiful performance, to show the world that the existence of Israelis and Jews isn't political. That was her mission. And she absolutely nailed it.
kabru for my beautiful friend 😁😁
Seeing people decide to watch Breaking Bad based on the Tumblr memes is especially funny when they do it specifically for the memes about Jesse, because... well, let's put it this way. Aaron Paul, the guy who played Jesse, was nominated for a Primetime Emmy award for best supporting actor in a drama series for his work on Breaking Bad on five separate occasions, including twice in one season, and won three of those nominations. He was the first person ever to win that award three times for the same role. Like, Jesse's storyline is so viscerally unpleasant that it set industry records.
Jesse Pinkman is basically the prototypical Poor Little Meow Meow in that yes, he does objectively terrible things, but literally everything about his life seems calculated to maximise his suffering while he's doing it. It gets so bad that the show's producers ended up making an entire spin-off movie about Jesse in which he kills two men in order to obtain money to purchase a fake identity and go into exile in Alaska, and this is framed as his happy ending.
they put him in a hole and yelled at him
They put him in a hole and yelled at him.
reminds me of when some old church in Sweden was cleaning out their storage and they forgot they had left like 80 medieval corpses in some ikea bags during renovations so somebody opened a closet door and it’s just
Zionism is wrong and you know it
do u have any other hobbies besides harassing random jews on the internet.
like this type of shit makes me insane bc i have literally had conversations w ppl where they’ve been like “zionism is unquestionably evil and wrong!!!!!!!” and i say “ok how about having a cultural center in eretz yisrael where jews can make pilgrimages and go to study and interact with other jews and basically have a hub of jewish life where not all jews necessarily have to live there but it serves as a central place for like record keeping and libraries and conferences etc” and they go “well that would be fine” and i have to break it to them that that concept is in fact one branch of zionist theory.
the word “zionism” is so broad and it’s just absolutely fucking useless to make any sweeping statements about it bc it’s accurate to say “the desire for a far right authoritarian jewish state in eretz yisrael where non jews aren’t given the same rights as jews is wrong” but it’s unhinged and antisemitic to say “jews being able to simply live in eretz yisrael if they want to is wrong” bc the former is criticizing a corrupt political ideology and the latter is saying you think jews should not be allowed to live in our homeland, even if we’re not the ones governing it, specifically because we are jewish. let’s have some critical thinking skills please.
I just wanna say as an Israeli zionist, that corrupt political ideology is not a representation of the majority, and even our current corrupt government doesn't support that ideology.
I would even argue further and say that's not zionism at all, because part of living a Jewish life is loving our neighbours and treating them with equal respect, no matter what their religion or ethnicity is.
Having a Jewish state and being an authoritarian state where the goy citizens have less rights is contradictory, because it goes against Jewish values. Which is also one of the reasons why I don't support the current government.
Are there people who believe that ideology who identify as Zionists? Probably. They can go choke on their hatred, they're just as bad as the antisemites who want us dead in my eyes.
Anyways antisemites need to find a hobby that isn't harassing Jews from anon. At least have the courage to do that from your own blog.
sad reality of the fanfic-to-published work economy is that the weirdest people are willing to do it. that's why there's now hundreds of shitty no plot cishet hate-to-love enemies-to-lovers books that are ex reylo fanfic. and it's not even good. that's because the people who wrote book-quality steve/bucky and kirk/spock fic are too normal to think to themselves "i should get this porn published". they're too busy working in local government offices
everyone I am happy to announce that the stevebucky fanfic author I had in mind while writing this post has officially reblogged it.
someone somewhere probably already drew this but here's the centaur kiss anyway
