The devil works hard but fanfiction authors working with absolutely garbage characterization work harder

The Definition of Valor, part 1 of the To Live with Honor and Bravery series

Part 2, AO3

When Tim had been attacked by Widower, he’d opened with a slash at Tim’s eyes. Tim had dodged, but not quick enough, and the protective lenses had shattered. Tim had attempted to fight through the sudden pain and fucked vision regardless.

Then he’d gotten stabbed in the spleen, which was just shit.

He had only barely managed to drive himself and Pru back to the hotel, his sight full of black spots and nausea-inducing fragmented vision. But he’d done it.

Little Timmy is a Narc AU

Batman gets super violent after Jasons death, same as canon.

Tim goes to Dick and get's rejected, same as canon.

Tim breaks into the Tower and tattles that Batman is verging on murder and permanently injuring people to Green Arrow, Flash, Superman, and Wonder Woman.

If he won't listen to a kid, then he'll definitely listen to his coworkers and tone the fuck down, right?

Tim is totally not a hero AU

He definitely isn't. Definitely.

Like, okay, maybe Batman got a little violent and maybe Dick was being a butt and not going back to Gotham to at least hover over Batman's shoulder disapprovingly, and MAYBE Tim had taken it upon himself to cobble together some dark clothes and a discarded kevlar vest and just like. Stalk Batman. Just a little.

Just enough to pop up and ask really loudly when he started going too far "BATMAN ARE YOU GONNA KILL HIM? IN FRONT OF A CHILD?" full of exaggerated gasps.

Tim gets possessed by a demon.

The only one who appears to realize something is off is Jason.

Jason then spends the next three weeks trying to convince the other Bats that something is Wrong with Tim, but no one seems to believe him.

Three weeks of various shenanigans, three weeks of the demon trying to be evil and failing every time due to strange circumstances, and finally culminates in the Demon cornering Jason and begging to be banished.

After all is said and done, Jason hauls an unconscious Tim to the Cave, ready to shout himself hoarse because literally what the fuck.

Only to be met with "oh, the possession ended already?"

Apparently Tim's specific contingency plan for Demonic possession is to "let the demon TRY to live my life and see how they like it".

Hes been possessed four time, and it's worked every time.

It's not a Timkon clone baby au

Tim comes back from fighting Ras and he's got a baby.

Given his history, everyone assumes it's his and Kons.

It isnt.

Tim, as he was rigging the place to blow, found one of Damians clones in baby state of development and just...couldn't leave him.

The baby is a Damian clone, and Tim has a Concern that Damian won't take the news ah...well. So he just lies by omission.

And makes sure the kid is turned away so no one sees green eyes instead of blue.

Conner thinks it's pretty funny, and uses his "I'm just a teenage father, Clark, how was I supposed to know?" For like, everything. Even things that make no sense in correlation to that sentence.

Surrogate au

Janet Drakes body was unable to handle a pregnancy, she was found to be infertile, and she and Jack wanted a kid.

So they hired a discreet surrogate. She was from a bad part of town, and already had one kid she'd apparently adopted or something, and even if she didn't keep her mouth shut literally no one would believe her.

Her name was Catharine Todd.

Itty Bitty Timmy becoming Superman obsessed instead of Batman obsessed

And he somehow still manages to tail Superman for photos without Superman knowing.

Like, his parents move to Metropolis instead of Gotham. He gets saved by Superman at three instead of watching the Graysons die.

He fixates.

He pinpoints where Superman appears to start from during emergency vs where he starts from via regular patrol based on the level of crime stopped and manages to find not only the Daily Planet, but also Clarks goddamn apartment building.

He manages to get a list and pictures of all reporters at the Daily Planet.

He figures out who Superman is.

Superman only realizes he has a child following him around when said child almost gets too close the the action.

And then he does it again.

And again.

In the middle of an argument, the same one that would have driven Jason away, Superman flies into the cave holding a windswept Tim.

"Please teach him how not to die." Was probably not the best opener, but Clarks suffered multiple small heart attacks thanks to the kid, and he needs help from the only completely human hero he knows who can go toe to toe with gods.

The other option was Green Arrow, but Tim's need to solve mysteries fits more with Bruce than Ollie.

Jason goes to beat the crap out of the newest Robin, but...that's a baby. And that's a baby. And that's a baby...oh look, another baby.

All of Young Justice got turned into babies, and Jason just walked in on the immediate aftereffect.

Now he's surrounded by a bunch of babies.

He may be enough of a jackass to beat up a 15 year old, but he draws the line at hurting literal babies.

Needless to say, when Dick arrives completely and fully ready to commit murder because of Robin's emergency beacon going off, he wasn't expecting the Big Bad Red Hood to be juggling four babies.

Or to have two of them shoved into his arms along with a shopping list for baby food and diapers.

"...I wanna hold Robin, though-"

"Get the fuck out, Golden Boy, and go get the goods."

Tim is in an impromptu sling made of a flat sheet. Why? Because every time Jason tried to set him down, Tim started sobbing and making grabby hands with his arms stretched to be picked back up.

These bastards are going to owe him for— “Nono, Conner. Please don’t eat the remote control; that’s not good for you and I don’t know when the last time you sanitized it was. Cookie?”

Oh shit. Now ALL of the kids want cookies.

The Riddler: Riddle me thi- Is that a fcking kid.

Dick Grayson, a non-native English speaker: What does fcking mean?

The Riddler: Fck- I mean sht- I mean it's a grown up word, ask your dad about it

[A Few Years Later]

The Riddler: Riddle me th- Is that another fcking kid

Jason Todd, raised in Crime Alley his entire life: Who the hll you calling a fcking kid? I'll beat your ass motherfcker, you and me right now.

The Riddler: Wow you are. Something.

[A Few Years After That]

The Riddler: Riddle me- Where the fck are you getting these children?

Tim Drake, raised in high society but also not raised at all: That's a naughty word sir.

The Riddler: At least you're polite

[A Few More Years Later]

The Riddler: Riddle m- WHY THE FCK DOES THIS ONE HAVE A SWORD!?

Damian Wayne, above silly things like Vulgar Language: I Was Expecting A Battle Of Wits, But You Appear To Be Unarmed.

The Riddler: WHY DOES HE TALK LIKE THAT???

"CONSTANTINE COME HERE"

It's Sunday Brunch, and the Batfamily have all agreed to meet and try to play nice.

It's...going. Certainly. There's definitely four to five arguments getting ready to start up, though.

Until.

"No thanks, Alfred. I'm not a huge coffee fan, actually."

All heads turn towards Tim.

Tim ignores them and picks up his book to continue reading.

It's 'Sense and Sensibilities'.

"...Drake, are you...unwell?" Damian's question is uncharacteristic of him, but he's the only one brave enough to ask.

"I'm fine, Dami, thanks."

Damian rears back in shock and looks to his father. Bruce's fork drops onto his place.

There was no snarkiness in Tim's words at all. Just polite, cordial gratitude. Sincere, even.

Bruce clears his throat.

"Hey Tim, I have this case-a triple homicide, locked room, and all of them-"

"No thanks, B. I'm taking a mental health day, so I'm pulling away from that kind of stuff right now and focusing on me."

Dick's chair slams into the wall as he stands up in shock, face pale.

Tim looks confused.

No.

Not Tim.

This wasn't Tim!

Or, Tim takes a mental health break because he's fuckin tired, okay? But the family thinks he's been replaced or is possessed.

Kon's brain needs a minute to restart, Rob being cute can do that to a guy

I wrote the start of pain because of how toxic Tim and Stephanie's relationship was.

"Why Bernard, though?" Stephanie asked, lounging on the couch behind Tim.

Tim rolled his eyes.

He was used to it; he knew that Steph like Bernard well enough, and that they sometimes conspired together.

Both he and Steph knew that they hadn't exactly...been good. For each other. Too immature, too soon.

It was an age-old fake argument they had for the sake of filling silence after a hard mission.

So, without thinking much about the rest of the Bats around them, he replied.

"For one, he listens to me when I tell him no," he said, referencing how Steph had held his civilian identity over keeping the relationship.

Dick, sitting in front of him, froze.

Then he slowly turned to look at Steph, body tense and eyes pissed.

"What?"

don’t stop!

Tim only took a few milliseconds to process how that probably sounded to the others, and met Dick just as his brother stood up, arms wrapping around him and locking his older brother's arms in place.

He could hear the electricity humming in the Batons that Dick already had in a tight grip. Tim could also feel the tension as the others in the room made the wrong assumption.

He was painfully aware that Dick could break out of his weak hold at any point, but seemed intent on not fighting Tim at all.

Tim took full advantage of that and got the biggest threat further away from her, and kept himself between them as he maneuvered Dick a good four more feet away from Steph.

Dick, however, did not take his eyes off of her.

"Not like that! Dick, not like that! It was about differing opinions and stuff, not like that!" Tim babbled, not loosening his arms for a second. He knew how slippery Dick could be, and he needed to give Steph time to run.

Steph, however, met Dick's anger with her own.

"Wow, good to know where I stand with you. You really think that little of me, huh?" Tim heard her stand up and started to turn towards her, but Dick's arms wrapped around him and kept him in place, the now-dead Batons clattering to the ground. "I'm out, Boy Wonder. I...need to breathe."

The Cave remained silent after she left, and Dick clutched him tighter.

"...If you feel threatened by her in any way-"

"-Dick, I swear; I didn't mean it like that. We just used to argue all the time, and we're better now as friends, that's all."

Dick's arms started to loosen their hold, but Tim kept his just as tight. He did, however, stop focusing on restraint and more on comfort.

The air was starting to get awkward, but Tim ignored it. Jason and Damian and Bruce could suck it up, Dick needed him.

"...And if something like that happened to me, you'd be the first person I'd go to," Tim said, ducking his head and hiding his face, "Because you'll always be there to catch me."

The arms that had loosened their hold tightened again, clinging to him.

He heard the others make excuses and leave the cave, Damian being the last one.

Neither Tim nor Dick acknowledged it.

Tim felt the top of his head start to get damp, and wisely said nothing about it.

He knew, from the intense training that they all had to do with victims, that Dick had experienced something traumatizing that was not on par with their typical trauma.

He knew that Dick did not want to talk about it.

He knew that Dick sometimes, when it was raining, would suffer flashbacks.

He would talk to Dick about apologizing to Steph afterwards, if there was anything left to salvage at all.

But his most important objective currently was keeping Dick anchored through whatever flashback he was having, as he always tried to do when he was able.

He could be there to catch Dick, too.

Timmy bein Creepy (but not really)

When Tim spent time chasing Batman and Robin through the streets, he did a lot of "hurry up and wait".

While waiting, he would find ways to entertain himself.

He trained the crows to bring him money in exchange for food. He trained the stray cats to alert him when people got too close. He trained the stray dogs to track and do silent alerting when they found their quarry.

He spoke with small time thieves and learned how to pick locks and pickpocket. He spoke with the homeless and learned the best ways to disappear without a trace, even if the cops were right on his tail.

He stays up at odd hours, he sleeps in weird places, and he's mastered the art of waiting, so much that it's like waiting for the other shoe to drop just by being in the same room as him.

So when he became Robin, inevitably he came across as a little creepy.

Everyone soon accepted that he was Tim Drake and he was just Like That.

Then Damian came along.

Damian is absolutely convinced Drake is possessed by a demon, and he will prove it.

Joker, in an effort to traumatize Batman once again, cuts off Red Robins hands right in front of him.

Only for Red Robin to grow them back by the time he turns around.

Joker stares at the new hands.

Red Robin stares at the new hands.

Well shit. Kid's a meta.

@simplestoryteller

Jason was going through the Tower, looking for Tim, and all was going well-until he found Tim's Secret Room.

"What the fuck," Jason whispered, inching back out of the room, "What the fuck. What the fuck? What the-what in the fuck-"

"You're not supposed to be here," a quiet voice said behind him.

Directly behind him.

Jason spun around and staggered further into the room as he did so, losing his footing and falling on a knee.

Timothy Jackson Drake, in all his Robin regalia, stood stock still in the entrance.

Jason slowly stood up, hands out.

"Look, I think we may have jumped the gun-"

"No one is allowed in this room, Red Hood," the little Robin said, voice even and calm and quiet; all the things that no one who was in the stupid hell room should be.

Jason swallowed, tensing and watching as the kid held up a hand with a remote in it.

"Don't." Jason whispered, although the voice modulator distorted it.

"No one, Red Hood."

A button was pushed.

With a hiss, all of the lids to the enclosures opened.

The enclosures that hosted nothing but spiders.

What the breaking point was, though, was when Jason felt something rather large plop down on his shoulder.

Then another. And another, and another.

Then they started crawling under his jacket.

Jason felt no shame in the scream that tore itself from his lips as he stumbled past Tim and ran.

~~~~~~

"....That was a little fucked up, Baby Bird. Just want you to know." Nightwing's voice sounded a little faint through the comm.

Tim scoffed, collapsing the bo staff and getting to work on trying to hunt down and place the spiders in their proper enclosures.

"No, what's fucked up is that I've probably lost a significant sum of money by doing this," he bitched, reaching down to collect some of the more docile ones and close the lids to the ones that hadn't tried to run.

"Spider breeding is so weird though, Tim."

"It's a way to pass time is what it is. Plus, they're cute."

One of the reasons Tim doesn't stay in the Manor is because his clothes keep fucking going missing.

He had been pretty sure it was Cass at first, until he started recognizing the oversized shirts Damian was wearing.

They were his.

Oh, Damian was still a little shit, to be sure; but he no longer tried to actively kill Tim, and apparently raided his closet for clothes so frequently Tim didn't even bother trying to find something once it went missing.

Tim and Damian had an understanding.

Damian admired Tim, and viewed him favorably.

Damian also had huge amounts of pride, and his previous behavior would be a source of embarrassment for not understanding how different the culture in America (and for non-assassins) was. Ergo, apologizing would be painful, so he wouldn't.

Instead, he stole Tim's clothes.

And Tim let him.

It was...a thing. Their thing.

Damian stole the other's hoodies and shirts as well, but he would always hunt down Tim's.

Dick had thought it was an antagonistic thing and had tried to talk him out of it, but both Tim and Damian ignored him.

He wasn't a part of this.

It was an unspoken apology, one that never ended. It was also an unspoken acceptance, one that never changed.

Damian stole four shirts from Tim.

"I apologize, I view you as family, I do not want you to die or leave, but I cannot speak this because it hurts me to admit to my mistakes."

Tim bought more clothes and wore them until it was time to 'lose' them in the manor.

"You're a little shit and not nearly as clever as you think you are, but I know you're sorry, and if this is how you show that you don't want me to leave forever then I'll do it for however long you need that reassurance."

It was stupid and it didn't make sense to literally anyone but them.

But they were the only ones who needed to know what it meant anyways.