YOU WROTE THE RULES. READ THEM. 

you know what’s always bugged me? when a character is faced with some magical two headed being or some shit and one always lies while the other tells the truth and to figure out which is which the character’s like “which one of you is the liar” or something like bruh literally all you gotta do is be like “what’s two plus two” one of them’s gonna say four and the other one is gonna say 83 or some shit. there you go. answered. go on with your magical quest to defeat david bowie. 

this has forty notes. that’s forty more notes than expected.

THIS IS A VERY GOOD POINT and deserves more notes

LISTEN i don’t normally engage in Discourse but this information is DANGEROUSLY MISLEADING!

the point of the riddle isn’t to figure out which one is lying, in fact, knowing which one lies and which one tells the truth is irrelevant. What you want is the correct answer from the magical beast/two guards/etc. Usually this means knowing which path to take. For that, you HAVE to ask it “if i ask the other head/guard/etc which is the safe way to go, what will they tell me?”

if you asked the truth-telling one, they’ll tell you the wrong way, because the liar will always mislead you. if you ask the liar, they’ll tell you the wrong way, because they’re misleading you, so

ALWAYS do the opposite of whatever answer you get.

“who cares this is a stupid tumblr post this doesn’t matter irl–”

WRONG AGAIN! story time:

A few years ago a friend threw a halloween party, and since he dressed as the Riddler, he decided to have a riddle contest.

now, i’ve been preparing for a riddle contest my entire life, since i first read the hobbit and it got bilbo out of trouble. for some reason, i assumed riddle contests were as inevitable as quicksand.

I answered the first riddle easily (it was one of the ones from the hobbit) and then i had to answer the next one to win a bottle of top-shelf rum. it was a variation on the two-guard riddle, only i had to choose one of two paper bags. one had crappy cheap vodka, the other the nice rum. 

the host and his friend did the classic one lies one tells the truth thing, and of course before i asked everyone started shouting “ask him what color your hair is!” and stuff like that, but i already knew what to ask, so i shushed them and won the rum

remember, kids, it doesn’t matter which one is lying and which one is telling the truth. all that matters is you get the correct knowledge to move you forward, win your rum, and make you seem like a superhuman riddle-solver to a crowd of drunken party guests.

always be ready for a riddle contest

Here’s a thing that usually doesn’t come up when people try to criticise this riddle as well. One of the conditions of the riddle is typically that you only get to ask one question. You arrive at the liar and the truth teller and you need to find out which bridge is safe and which one will collapse when you’re halfway across.

They tell you that one of them always lies and that one of them always tells the truth. And they tell you you can ask them one question.

If you ask “What’s two plus two?” than great. You know which one lies but you also still don’t know which bridge you can cross and can’t find out.

You played yourself.

i can get the answer in zero questions. block all the other exits, light them on fire, and see which way they run.

^ Look at Alexander the Great up here, cutting the knot and all.

~ Delalorm Semabia #lifequotes #motivationalquotes #motivation #quotes https://www.instagram.com/p/BpRs-DPg8WZ/?utm_source=ig_tumblr_share&igshid=12gbbi9wg4bxe

Billie from Supernatural, created for the Supernatural Artbook.

– Prismacolor Marker

the russo brothers when they wrote infinity war

I don’t want to fight anymore, I’m tired of fighting. The mark ain’t.

Help!

There has to be some, yes? I just need a few names, I’m doing a project about women in tragedy and all I’m finding is greeks like Iphigenia and Agave, and than classical Juliet, Ophelia. I don’t want to draw only white people. Do you know any tragic poc  woman?

Mmm, weaver girl and the cow herder? That’s kind of tragic?

That’s one bad ass line

True BAMF.

Damn right he won.

Reaper Prompts

whitedelilah said: Hello! I currently have a plot about a girl who is supposed to die and the reaper falls in love with her so he can’t kill her. She is bubbly and outgoing despite her illness. And he is arrogant and sarcastic. If you have anything I’d greatly appreciate it! Thank you love!

Anonymous said: Could you give me something for a snarky reaper and his human companion?

1) “You know, you could say thank you,” the reaper said. “For not collecting your soul. Maybe with a dinner date?” “You know I can barely leave the hospital bed right?”  “I’ll bring jelly here.” “Jelly?” “Jelly and ice cream - for parties and those who are sick.”

2) “You’re not collecting the cat.” “I let you collect the boyfriend.” “It’s not collecting - it’s dating! Humans do that!” “I’m skeptical. He looks like he’s trying to suck your soul out of your face, you can understand why that would be disturbing for me.”  The human stared at the reaper, trying to figure out if they were being serious.

3) “I honestly don’t know how you can be so cheerful, it’s nauseating.” “It’s called the silver lining, and if you can stop scowling for five minutes I’m going to teach it to you along with concepts like fun and taking your head out of your arse.” She flashed him a blindingly bright smile. “Grim reaper. It’s in the name. Grim.” “Oh please, I saw you laughing at that puppy vine and no flowers died at the sound or anything.”

4) “Do you like my Halloween costume? I’m you,” the human said with a grin. “I have never once dressed in a hood and a scythe, I don’t know where people are getting this from.” 

5) “Do you ever get tired of, you know, collecting souls?”  “Why do you think there are poltergeist? Honestly, I take a holiday once and we get the bloody witch trials.” 

A Fey Prompt List

Have a Fey Prompt List, as requested by more of you than I can list. 

1) “Our nations are at war,” the unseelie murmured, nipping the human’s ear. They were a moonlight of a creature, dark hair and pale eyes.  “And you,” said the seelie as they kissed the human’s neck. “Make a perfect peace treaty. Don’t you want peace?” Golden as summer, dark skinned and as radiant as the spring. “Or perhaps a perfect weapon?” The unseelie turned the human’s head, to steal a kiss from their mouth this time. “In peace, that is often the same thing.””

2) I thought I could save myself - isn’t that what happened in a fairytale? Not in the old ones, you promised with a winter’s smile.

3) The child reached up curiously to touch ethereal wings, awed like a moth drawn to flame, delighted by the colours and the magic flickering offered in the Fey Queen’s hand. The fey loved children, for all children are a little fey. The same amorality, the same delights and games and unintentional cruelties. The child laughed, and clambered a little closer to get a better look.  Her parents watched in horror. 

4) “What is…this?” his boyfriend looked at the ice rink with a mixture of awe and horror. “We don’t have this.” In the world his fairy came from, everything was sunshine and blossom and bloom. A summer paradise.  He grinned and held out a hand. “You’re going to love it.”

5) I’m nobody’s pet,” the human bit out.  The fey was silent for a moment, watching as the human panted for breath, cheeks flushed with rage. “Did you not agree willingly to come with us?” “Well - yes - but-” “-But what? You were not taken, you were not imprisoned. You gifted yourself to our kind and to suggest otherwise is astonishingly rude and disgustingly human. You would call us cruel simply because our ways are different to your own.”

6)  Away with the fairies, the grown ups said among themselves.  Grown ups should know better than to tease the fair folk with such challenges.

7) “I didn’t mean to hurt you.” The fey ducked their head, to try and meet their lover’s eyes. “I forget myself. We are - humans are - your hearts are different than ours.” Softer, eyes closed, with fluttering kisses. “I would never intentionally hurt you. My memory of pain is so fleeting, my sorrows like footsteps in sand. I am the prince of summer. I can only love you like summer does. I’m sorry.”

Te Fiti and Te Kā

I would tell you what you mean to me if I were what you say I am,

brave, you say I am brave, fearless, lightning and fire,

you ask me what you are to me and I know what you are hinting at,

do you have something to say to me, will you stop toeing the line?

You say you wish you were sharp like me, spoke like me,

I am crass, I am cold in my fear, and I wish I were what you thought,

you ask what I see when my eyes follow you and I have many answers,

I see someone who is stronger than me,

and yes you are, don’t you dare claim you are not,

you hold these explosive emotions in your hand, 

you hold people in your hands and to your heart,

I hold their leashes, I leave them notes but never will I even hold a hand,

you look me in the eyes and I see a strange purity,

a purity that the wistful part of me that admits I love you wishes was the main characteristic in the world,

it’s not sadly, the world is far more similar to me than you,

but I am far more insidious with my tricky words and spider web,

I answer your questions with words I know you can not comprehend accompanied by shallow definitions,

You mollify me, that means you keep me calm, correct and a lie,

I run a thousand miles in a breath and my blood is fire and my words come whistling out like bullets as I seek lesser folk and monsters to tear down for power and thrill,

I am a machine chugging away faster than Hermes,

then I see you and suddenly my mind is still and calm, my bellicose soul becomes soft and it tickles when you make my soul soft most delightfully,

I don’t know if I can or would explain what I see in you,

how my days are gray, how I try to paint them with conflict and winning and beating, success, and sharp banter, shallow connections,

how I spend a brief hello with you and suddenly I see red in people’s cheeks and the leaden weights on my back disappear, I am light,

suddenly their aimless talking no longer makes me snap at the bridle,

in fact, their chatter reminds me a little of you, except you always are trying to make a point,

a vague point, an indirect point that I think you don’t always realize is coming from your mouth,

I feel guilty because sometimes I see a flicker of something when you speak with him, in how you turn subtly to glance at me, invite me into the conversation,

it concerns me because while from the bottom of my being I adore you I refuse to allow myself to go farther,

he is a sweet and kind boy, he will make you happy, and yes, one day there will be a break up, 

it’ll be sad and I know you fear it but I will bring you to a stream far away and you may throw rocks, cry, and be hurt and in pain, and scream, you may lose yourself and I will do my best to put you back together with spider silk and logic, 

but I think it is far better you choose him because the longer you hesitate the more I worry you’ve begun to see I’ve made you something very special in my life,

you being my Sun does not mean you should waste such a lovely, fun opportunity because you realized I love you,

a little too much, I know I love you a little too much,

but dearest, sweetest, most important one, if you loved me back I would be lost,

I would be at war, the first time we met I knew deep down I could not help but love you, and I knew I would not allow myself to ever express, act, never,

I would be tearing myself up in the desire to take your extended hand and the knowledge that I’ll burn,

you’ll burn, I’ll burn, it’ll all burn,

love can’t be worth burning,

Go love that boy,

the longer you hesitate the more fearful I become,

we may still burn.