A Mess™

getting anonymous hate (“just checking in” emails) from jealous haters (my professors) because of my hot takes (incredibly overdue assignments)

Dropping a brick on the post below

hee hee

the washing machine and dryer fuck each other when you're not around btw

when i was very young, maybe 3-6 years old, i thought the washer and dryer were married, the washer was the wife and the dryer was the husband. whenever i'd go into the laundry room i'd just look at them and be like oh yes. this is peak romance.

admire folks who reblog posts which contradict eachother. exactly! keep em guessing

fuck people who reblog posts which contradict each other. no! be explicitly clear

happy annoy squidward day

Actually, Annoy Squidward Day is January 15th. Although the calendar doesn’t have the month written on it, if you continue to watch the episode, they’re competing for January’s Employee of the Month.

I’ve been waiting all year to reblog this

A few of my favorite ladies from Stardew - Abigail and Haley

https://sitaduncan.carrd.co/

please consider how much of a cryptid the farmer is in stardew valley

like

-[stares into space for three hours, completely motionless while waiting for their favorite person to open the door so they can shove a gift in their hands and then immediately runs off]

-they enter the mines. they are knocked unconscious. they enter the mines once more. they are knocked unconscious. harvey begs them to stop. they enter the mines o

-appears from the fukcign...void in the middle of conversations, says one thing, RETURNS TO THE VOID AND REFUSES TO ELABORATE FURTHER

- the farmer has been fishing for 12 straight hours. they eat a fistful of tulips. they continue fishing.

-people don't question why one person needs so much void mayonnaise. they also have stopped noticing when the farmer climbs into the sewer.

-it is your birthday. a farmer kicks open the door at 9 am, hands you an entire chocolate cake, and leaves. you are overjoyed. you do not understand.

-eating an entire pizza in one bite.

Oh so he’s doing eugenics now

elon musk reinvents the lobotomy

Babe wake up, lobotomy 2 just dropped

Give me a gun and Autism will solve Elon Musk

this mug i bought has a cat sitting at the bottom

goodbye kitty

I’M SO MAD

Honestly, we’ve only seen deep sea fish at their worst. Deep sea fish are like the opposite of the fast food expectation vs reality meme.

Little babys will ALWAYS gather under a warm place like this. Anything small will.

If you are short enough, you might wake up under a bird...

This legitimately changed me. Like the course of my life has been altered after viewing this

Alex, Abigail & co. ( *ʰᵃᵖᵖᶦⁿᵉˢˢ ᶦˢ ʷʰᵉⁿ ᵃˡᵉˣ ᶦⁿᵗᵉʳᵃᶜᵗˢ ʷᶦᵗʰ ᵐᵒʳᵉ ᵖᵉʳˢᵒⁿ ᶦⁿ ᵗᵒʷⁿ )

i enter the saloon. i offer my beloved an unwrapped lump of goat cheese that has been in my pocket for 3 weeks. i bleed out on the floor.

Remember that one dialogue Sebastian has about getting shanked by a rock crab? Yeah. That’s it. I just wanted to draw that.