Multifandom Smut Connoisseur

"if tumblr dies you can find me on bluesky" "if tumblr dies you can find me on Instagram" if tumblr dies you cannot find me. It's over. I'm free.

tonight's plans: jerk off to completion..... two cans of sprite (crush against forehead like a neanderthal school bully) ...... write the great american novel

“you should be at the club” Brother I should literally be sent to the seaside for my health

I love all books but sometimes you read a book and you’re like so were all 21 thousand of you blindfolded and at gun point when you rated it 5 stars

my favorite genre of fictional character is like "i am terrifying to almost everyone, i'm very good at killing, i can endure anything, i've become exceptionally good at playing into my reputation, and if you try to give me positive social interaction i will react with confusion and cower in a corner like an abused animal. and i may try to shoot you. but there is also a chance i may imprint on you like a feral dog receiving its first loving touch! good luck."

Just tried to play an ancient flute and it started filling the room with this awful miasma that wont go away

Why does staff still allow people funnier than you to leave tags on your posts. They should have fixed that by now

i was having a lil frustration meltdown today when i was interrupted by my bestie sending me a video of a bug crawling fast with Mario Kart music playing and i reacted so similarly to this gif its eerie

fascinating post I made in 2018

….i hate him

(all made by me mamas)

(via three--rings)

When I was 15, I spent a month working on an archeological dig. I was talking to one of the archeologists one day during our lunch break and he asked those kinds of “getting to know you” questions you ask young people: Do you play sports? What’s your favorite subject? And I told him, no I don’t play any sports. I do theater, I’m in choir, I play the violin and piano, I used to take art classes.

And he went WOW. That’s amazing! And I said, “Oh no, but I’m not any good at ANY of them.”

And he said something then that I will never forget and which absolutely blew my mind because no one had ever said anything like it to me before: “I don’t think being good at things is the point of doing them. I think you’ve got all these wonderful experiences with different skills, and that all teaches you things and makes you an interesting person, no matter how well you do them.”

And that honestly changed my life. Because I went from a failure, someone who hadn’t been talented enough at anything to excel, to someone who did things because I enjoyed them. I had been raised in such an achievement-oriented environment, so inundated with the myth of Talent, that I thought it was only worth doing things if you could “Win” at them.

Unrestrained summer fun.

Today in "Animals that it didn't occur to me might be able to go to the beach and enjoy it, but apparently do and now that I'm seeing it makes perfect sense": Camel!

People know that the whole "don't portray [harmful action] because viewers might recreate it" thing is a rule for children's shows right? It's supposed to be shit like "don't show peppa pig playing with fire so we don't get sued if a kid watches it and burns their house down." Not like, fanfiction for adults.

prev i hope u dont mind me sharing ur tags bc yeah this is an interesting add on

I'm going to take a risk on this one

Anyone who has worked a real job knows the look of someone standing there looking at something that's gonna fuck up their afternoon

i could recognize this expression, this stance, the strain in the voice over the phone from a hundred yards away

and if you think that's not a fair example because firefighters are used to showing up to stuff that fucks up a whole afternoon, consider the full picture