Fuck you its Halloween

is anyone else just going through life like “yeah i just gotta get past this last difficult week and then it’s smooth sailing from there!” but like… every week

why the fuck is no one naming their children after greek goddesses? Name your fucking child Persephone?????? Bitch???????!?

is anyone else just going through life like “yeah i just gotta get past this last difficult week and then it’s smooth sailing from there!” but like… every week

get you a man who can do both

one of my patients came in for an emergency visit, because she snapped the wire on her retainer watching the movie when MBJ took his shirt off she clenched her teeth so fucking hard she snapped it. that is the fucking funniest shit ever to me this tiny 17 year old girl thirsting so goddamn hard she busted steel

Y'all, it gets better. She found out.

We interviewed her, obviously.

update:

Two female Arctic wolves nursing pups together. As a behaviour it’s very rare and it’s the first time it has ever been filmed. [x] 

wlw wolves … LESBIAN wolves

We also know the wolves aren’t sisters or packmates who could, arguably, have developed the bond and co-parented due to familial bonds.

We’re expressly told that Black Spot joined the pack from elsewhere, which means that not only did she join the pack willingly, she left her own to do it. Female wolves don’t generally do that.

Also, that’s canine pair behaviour; wolves do tend to pair off like that, so…

LESBIAN WOLVES

Every time I here “but too much representation just isn’t realistic, we live in America, most people are white” irks me to no fucking end

Like listen, just in my friend group there’s:

-a girl from Italy

-a guy from the UK

-4 of us are half and half (I’m Italian and Danish, others in my group are Mexican, African American, Phillipino, etc)

-1 is gay, 3 are bi, one is questioning, and another is ace

-1 is an only child

-3 of us have only (a) older sister(s)

-1 has older and younger brothers and sisters

-1 lives with her mom and step dad and hasnt seen her biological dad since she was 6

-1 lives with her boyfriend because her dad died when she was little and her mom kicked her out

-some of us go to college and some dont

-some of us have jobs (two even) and some dont

-1 just passed bootcamp for the military (and sidenote: it’s one of my female friends)

-3 of us have been diagnosed with anxiety

-2 of us have been diagnosed with depression

-2 of us have adhd

-2 have extremely bad acne

-2 suck at math

-3 can sing really well

-2 have shitty handwriting

-1 is lefthanded

-3 are bilingual

-all of us have brown hair but two have blue eyes

-one likes to change her hair color every week

-some of us have never done anything other than cut our hair

-some shave our legs and some don’t and that goes for all genders

-speaking of genders there’s male, female, nonbinary, and demi fellows

-1 hates chocolate

-one hates yellow while its the others favorite color

-some always where bright and happy colors

-some always wear black (me)

-some of us own dogs

-some own cats

-some own both

-one owns a fucking tortis my dudes

-1 listens to jazz

-2 listen to kpop

-1 listens to oldies

-1 listens to country and hiphop

-1 listens to indie

-Some of us are going to be art majors

-Others are planning to be nurses

-2 of us are overweight

-1 is extremely underweight

-half are under 5’5 while the rest of us are taller than 5’11

I could go on and on

I have less than 10 friends.

And we didn’t “force” our friendship, none of us huddled together because we were all “misfits” of sorts.

We’re people, people that get along, so we choose to stick together. There doesn’t need to be a “reason” for representation, it just happens. And the whole “most friend groups are white” “most people are straight” “most people-“ is fucking OLD and I’m tired of hearing it as an excuse.

Not every single friend group needs to be a bunch of straight white kids with perfect families with a mom and dad that have overwhelmingly cool and zany jobs or an underwhelming office job. Or fit the typical one younger sibling or one older sibling. Not all of them are going to be skinny and cute, not all of them have perfect skin, not all happen to have the same height, or same religion and political views (people can disagree and still get along! It’s called respect!). It doesn’t take carbon copies to make it work.

TL;DR As far as I’m concerned any excuse for lack of representation is just someone yelling “IM A HUGE ASSHOLE, PLZ DONT BE ANGRY THAT I ACTIVELY IGNORE AND DISREGARD ANYONE WHO ISNT MY EXACT BRAND OF A HUMAN BEING”

The US is full of representation ,my friend group and I live in California and our group is intensely diverse

- 2 Filipinos

- 4 Mixed asians

- 2 Italians

- 6 Eastern Europeans/Scandinavians

- 2 Russians

- 1 Australian

- 1 Trinidadian

- 4 Germans

- 1 Salvadorian

- 2? African americans

- Probably a lot more, I don’t even remember everything

- 2 Aroaces

- 1 Pansexual

- 1 Lesbian

- 1 Biromantic

- 7 Heterosexuals (no shame!)

- 1 Bisexual

- 1 Questioning

- 1 Left handed , 1 ambidextrous

- 10 biliguals, 3? trilinguals (russian, korean, japanese, spanish, english, tagalog, french)

- Brown hair, black hair, blonde, brunette, dirty blonde, blue (soon to be red!), purple, bleach blonde

- 1 Schizophrenic

- 1 w/Bipolar disorder

- 6 w/Anxiety

- 2? Suicidal

- All of us have brown eyes except for myself (bluish-hazel)

- We are all between 4’11 and 5’6”

- 5 are very skinny, 2 consider themselves chubby, 4 are curvy

- Want to major in architecture, heart surgery, medical robotics, art, natal care, even MORE probably

- Many of us grew up traumatised

- 7? of our parents either left or died or had a chronic illness and/or didn’t see their kid often

- Listens to kpop, rap, mariachi, alternative, punk rock, indie, pop, jpop, r&b, and probably more

- Some of us wear dark clothes, some of us wear grunge, and some of us just don’t care about fashion

- 4 of us wear glasses

- Some of us are colourblind and have speech impediments

- Some of us have straight a’s, some of us don’t, and that’s fine

- Some of us are very mature, some of us are yet to mature

- Some of us are introverts, extroverts, pessimists, and optimists

- Many of us play sports (softball, gymnastics, volleyball, ice skating, martial arts)

- 6 of us are in the district honor band/orchestra (I have been in it two years in a row), 1 of us plays in a mariachi

- 10 of us have played at least one instrument in a class

- At least 1 of us hates chocolate

- Some of us have never dated and never will, some of us have dated many people, some of us have dated one, some of us are in healthy relationships

- 2 of us are nonbinary & 1 of us is demi

- 9? of us own dogs

- 2 of us own cats

Don’t ever say that america is full of white bread cishet white people until you check your facts

people who might wanna see this: @mustardcentaur @stressed-and-annoyed @zestysporks

Amazing addition, thank you

Can we talk about the fact that these two blogs just reblogged this photo from me back-to-back???

Dean has always hated his name.

Everytime he’d hear his name being called growing up, he knew he was in trouble.

His dad used his name numerous times and it eventually became tainted.

Then he met one person, and that person gave his name meaning again.

Dean actually craved to head his name roll off the angels lips.

And boy did it make him smile every time it did.

“Hello, dean.” The Castiel rasps over the phone, making deans heart skip a beat.

“Dean!” The Castiel screams, when Dean gets hurt on a hunt.

“Dean.” The Castiel whispers when they make Love late at night.

“DEAN.” Castiel raises his voice when Deans being stubborn.

“Dean.” Castiel chokes out when he slips the ring on his ring finger on their wedding day.

“Dean.” Castiel says with the biggest smile on his face when they find the perfect home for them and their future kids.

“Dean.” Castiel says happily when they sign the adoption papers for their first child.

“Dean.” Castiel whispers, wrapping his arms around Deans waist, looking down at the perfect little girl in his arms.

“Dean.” Castiel calls out when their daughter takes her first steps.

“Dean.” Castiel cries out when their daughter walks across the stage on graduation day.

“Dean.” Cas sobs when they walk their daughter down the isle on her wedding day.

“Dean.” Castiel cries when they find out Deans sick.

“DEAN!” Castiel sobs when he finally closes his eyes and stops breathing for the last time.

“Dean.” Castiel breathes out when he scrafices himself on a hunt with Sam.

“Dean?” Castiel asks when he gets to heaven and sees him sitting there.

“Dean.” Castiel sighs when Dean turns around and gives him a breath taking smile.

I screamed. Im ugly laughing. I sound like a grandfather

I’m never prepared….I can’t

Bruh lmfaoooooo

When u meet lady gaga but someone in the group chat is getting roasted

When Jesus rises from his grave

My bros I have been doing a lot of reading about Wacky WWII Hijinks lately and I want to tell you a story because I love it okay

once upon a time there was a dude in Spain named Juan Pujol Garcia. Pujol was a chicken farmer. Pujol hated him some goddamn fascists.

See Spain had recently ended its civil war, with the fascists taking power. So when WWII broke out in Europe, Spain technically remained neutral but in practice was buddy buddy with the Nazis. Juan Pujol Garcia thought this was pretty bullshit

so soon after war breaks out Pujol travels to his local British embassy and goes “hey I wanna spy on the Nazis for you”

“who the fuck are you?” say the British, and kick him out

but Pujol is not deterred! He still wants to dunk on some fascists, so now he goes to his local German embassy instead. “hey” he says, “I wanna spy on the British for you, I sure do hate them”

“yeah okay” say the Germans “that seems pretty legit”

and just like that Pujol now officially works for the Abwehr, the German intelligence agency. They hand him some spy gear (invisible ink and such) and instruct him to travel to Lisbon, and from there make his way into the UK. So Pujol heads to Lisbon, and a little while later writes to his German handlers telling them he’s made it to England

Pujol had not made it to England. He had, in fact, made it to the Lisbon public library, where he checked out a number of English guide books and set about just wholesale making shit up

this is slightly complicated by the fact that, for example, he completely did not understand British currency and all his expense reports were basically gibberish. He also reported things like bribing Scotsmen, because the people of Glasgow would “do anything for a litre of wine” (an actual quote) because, hey, people in Spain like wine so that’s probably the same right?

Here is where it starts to get really crazy, because the Abwehr loves this. “wow this dude is a great spy” they say, because apparently none of them had ever been the England either. In fact, they are so pumped about this new awesome spy that the British start to get worried

you see, by this time the British had cracked German’s supposedly unbreakable Enigma code and were totally dunking on the Nazis by reading basically all of their ~super top secret~ radio transmissions. And, crucially, they’d become so good at breaking and reading traffic that there were literally no German spies in England. The Germans would set up a spy drop (usually dropping dudes in by parachute in the middle of the night), the British would intercept the message and then just scoop the dudes up as soon as they landed in a move that must have been SUPER embarrassing to the spies

so there are no German spies in the UK because they’re all sitting in a prison run by MI5 (although some are being run under supervision as double agents, feeding Germany bullshit). But suddenly MI5 is picking up all this traffic from the Germans talking about their super great spy- a spy the British do not have in their jail

“oh shit” says MI5, and starts rereading all the transmissions they have to and from this mysterious super spy.

“hey wait” says MI5, upon actually reading the shit the spy was sending. “someone is playing silly buggers, pip pip cheerio”

At this point, Pujol, still in Lisbon, had actually been approaching the British embassy again, repeatedly, but apparently “I am literally an Abwehr agent and would like to offer you my services” wasn’t interesting enough, because he was repeatedly turned away, again. It wasn’t until MI5 started asking around that one of the embassy staff was like “oh yeah we know that guy”

so in 1942 the British finally make contact with Pujol and he officially becomes a spy for MI5. They move him to London and assign him a case officer so he can start making up even better bullshit

and he does. Once actually in London, Pujol reports to the Abwehr that he’d recruited a whole slew of informants- from a bunch of Welsh Aryans to disaffected army officers. He ends up with a network of 20+ sub-spies, all feeding him information from around the UK

none of these people actually exist

Pujol just straight up invented like 20 people, keeping careful track of their fake personalities, names, and activities. With the help of MI5, the information he sends becomes even better- a mix of true but ultimately useless facts and actually important intel timed to arrive in Germany just slightly too late to be of any use. He and his “spy network” become the Abwehr’s most trusted agents

Pujol, now codenamed Agent Garbo (for his acting skills), ends up playing a huge role in the run-up to D-Day, where the Allies mounted a huge intelligence campaign to convince Hitler that the planned site of attack was going to be Calais and not Normandy (this was Operation Fortitude and you should absolutely look it up for more Wacky WWII Adventures). Obviously you know how this ended

crazily enough, the Abwehr never figured out that Pujol was a double agent. After the war he received both the Iron Cross Second Class (which require personal authorization from Hitler), and a Member of the Order of the British Empire (from King George VI)

unable to resist being totally fucking ridiculous, Pujol turned down MI5’s post-war offer to continue spying, but this time against the USSR. “no,” he said “just help me fake my own death and then I’m moving to Venezuela”

and that’s exactly what he did. Juan Garcia Pujol died in 1988, at the age of 76

Okay I’m just editing my reblog to add this picture of Juan Pujol Garcia because I feel that it adds so much to the story to picture him doing ALL THE ABOVE with this expression:

What a legend.

Weaponized foreign shitposting

this is my favorite post in a very, very long time.

Chaotic Good alignment right there.

*dies laughing*

Oh my gods, he is a legend. Best post ever.

Saving to show my husband bc he would effing love this

Ouija boards say “Ages 8+”. So you have to be 21 to drink, but can summon the dead at 8.

i love laying the FUCK down and sleeping

ohhhhhhh my god check this out 

this is the cat of 2018 please welcome her with open arms 

I’m over here dying to have a wife and straight men are still making “marriage ruined my life” jokes. Like? Buddy? First of all that’s never been funny. Second, if you don’t want your wife I’ll take her