my favourite wikipedia article is the middle english article about frogges

“A frogge ben a wee beeſt wiþ foure legges, þe whiche liveþ boþ in water and on lond. He ben broun or grene or yelwe, or if he be tropical, he may be dyuers coloures. He haþ longis and gylles boþ. He haccheþ fro an ei and he þen be a tadpolle. He groweþ to be a frogge, if he be nat eton.”

nothing makes me laugh like “if he be nat eton”

I was out with a friend tonight doing one of my fave things. Reading the backs of romance novels aloud. Found this gem.

This is honestly the most wild sounding romance novel I have ever seen and thought it might brighten someone’s day.

Dampires (demon vampires)

*slams back a bourbon whiskey* listen mate I’ve been here for all kinds of ridiculous tumblr meltdowns I was here when Yahoo took over I was here for dashcon I was here when the notes disappeared I was here back when those superwholock chain posts of fucking up non believers were taken seriously and through every single one I have done fuck all. I have not changed a goddang thing. I waited for the end and the end never came. I do not plan on changing my status quo now. either things will go on as they always have and in six months time I’ll be here watching staff announce that anyone with over 1000 followers are being monitored or I will have been physically deleted from this wonderful stupid fucking website and either way I’m gonna go out posting pictures of my cat

That cactus is plenty titty-looking (and desert related) to attract the algorithm

i can relate to these lyrics so much it fucking hurts

I see you're leaving me and taking up with with the enemy

The cold comfort of the in-between, a little less than a human being

A little less than a happy high, a little less than a suicide

The only things that you really tried

Me, after reading “ignores TFP entirely” on the tags of a new s4 fix it fic:

As it should

Best and truest post

I want to sign someone’s cast with “Final warning. You have 1 week to get the rest of my money”

gangnam style > the entire beatles discography

Technology has gone too far

i got up at like 5am and made all these goddamn pancakes that’s not very captain america, dorito man of you you gotta

I think we finally broke this shit

Find your name with the gif button and add the one that is the most relatable

Make "everybody's gay, Kimmy" the new "Harold, they're lesbians"

the new yorker published a photo from fyre fest that was photoshopped to include the dashcon ball pit

me: babe u look like an angel :)

her: