"The reason that the rich were so rich, Vimes reasoned, was because they managed to spend less money. Take boots, for example. ... A really good pair of leather boots cost fifty dollars. But an affordable pair of boots, which were sort of OK for a season or two and then leaked like hell when the cardboard gave out, cost about ten dollars. ... But the thing was that good boots lasted for years and years. A man who could afford fifty dollars had a pair of boots that'd still be keeping his feet dry in ten years' time, while a poor man who could only afford cheap boots would have spent a hundred dollars on boots in the same time and would still have wet feet."

Men at Arms - Sir Terry Pratchett

Why are Alessia Cara's lyrics so relatable yet so underrated?🤌🤌🤌🤌😭😭😭

Johnny 13 accidentally gains a brother.

He didn't plan for this to happen, it just did!

He was visiting his hometown, hanging around crime alley when a street rat tried to steal his bike having not noticed him.

The kid was in the middle of trying to Hotwire his bike when he couldn't help but comment. "It's the other wire, that one sets the alarm off."

"Thanks." The kid replied distractedly letting go of the slightly glowing green wire and reaching for the faintly glowing red wire.

A quiet pause.

The kid slowly turned his head so that he was looking into Johnny's eyes. "This is your bike, ain't it?" The kid asked having realised he wasn't alone.

Johnny smiled with maybe one too many teeth but luckily the kid didn't seem phased "Yep."

The kid nodded as if it was just his luck. "Ya gonna beat me up?"

"Nah, it's not like I ain't Hotwire my own fair share." He wasn't worried that the kid would steal his bike, and if the kid managed to pull it off the bike would just return to him.

"Come on kid, let's get something to eat." The kid narrowed his eyes in suspicion as Johnny walked away, that's fine, it was the kid's choice if he followed or not.

Curiosity and hunger seemed to win out as the kid fell in step beside him.

Johnny found the nearest bat burger (they weren't around when he was alive and not something he'd ever really get used to) and got a family meal with money he had 'burrowed' from the residents of Amity Park.

"Why you doing this?" The kid questioned after devouring three burgers and starting on his fourth.

Johnny shrugged. "Just know what it's like to go hungry is all." He didn't really know, maybe it was because the kid reminded him of himself or maybe it was just Phantom was rubbing off on him.

It was time for them to go their separate ways once the meal was finished and the few leftovers hidden away.

His bike was right where he left it "hey, kid. What's your name?" Johnny asked as he started the ignition.

The kid stared right into his eyes, like he was weighing Johnny's worth. "Jason."

"Jason Todd" The kid said it slow, like each word was a mistake.

Jason Todd,huh? Johnny committed it to memory. "Name's Johnny, kid." He gave back. "I'll see you around."

----------------

After that it became a sort of habit to find the kid, buy him food and listen to whatever was happening in town, whenever he visited Gotham.

The other ghosts thought it was funny, one of them even jokingly said "welcome to parenthood."

But it didn't feel like Jason was his kid. It felt more like... Having a little brother.

Yeah, that was it.

One day Johnny rolled into Gotham with a crisp one hundred in his pocket, unknowingly donated by the Manson family, fullly intending on buying Jason some new clothes, probably a few books, and maybe a new lock pick set.

But he couldn't find him.

Johnny searched crime alley top to bottom, he checked the police headquarters, checked every bat burger, checked the docks.

He ignored the growing pit of worry that in his chest.

Johnny finally found Jason in a swanky mansion that was obviously owned by someone who could give plasmius a run for his money.

Jason, book worm that he was, was found sitting in the mansions library.

Really one of these days Johnny should introduce him to Ghostwriter, they'd get along great.

"Hey, kid."

Jason jumped and whatever book he was reading fell out of his hands.

He lit up once he saw who it was. "Johnny, you're here!" That excitement turned to fear and worry "You can't be here, what if you get caught?"

Johnny waved the kid's worry away. "Don't sweat it, nobody sees me if I don't want'em to." Then it was Johnny's turn to be concerned. "What happened, I couldn't find you in crime alley."

Jason's face went through a complicated range of emotions. "I got adopted by Bruce Wayne."

Johnny's eyes flashed, he knew the horror stories about adoption. "He treating you okay?" The man would never breathe again if he wasn't.

Seeing the possible murder scene, Jason eased his worries. "Yeah, he's fine, it's just a bit weird."

Homicide prevented for now.

Johnny took a seat across from the kid in a chair that was probably worth more then Johnny owned living or dead. "Alright, fill me in."

And Jason did.

Johnny learned about how he was caught stealing the wheels off the Batmobile (he couldn't tell if that was bravery or stupidity) by the Batman which somehow led to Bruce Wayne adopting him.

"I think his other kid doesn't like me much, but it ain't bad here." Jason said as he finished his story.

Johnny quietly nodded as he absorbed the information and thought about where to go from here.

He had planned on getting Jason a nice home (woulda offered his own haunt if the living could live in the ghost zone) preferably in Amity where he could meet everyone. (Kitty would love him)

Here Jason had the chance to never go hungry, get into good schools, always have what he needed.

This situation was...ideal.

Even if Johnny wasn't happy with it. "You happy here?" What mattered was that Jason was.

Jason visibly thought about it. "...Yeah...I am."

And the decision was made.

"You know you can come to me for anything, right? If you want to get out of here or just want someone to talk to." Johnny needed the kid to know that.

Jason rolled his eyes but replied. "Yeah, Johnny, I know."

So Johnny left reluctantly feeling like he was making a mistake somehow.

---------------

Johnny was fighting Phantom with Kitty when he felt it.

He felt Jason die.

And Johnny s c r e a m e d

–----------------

He nearly tore apart the ghost zone in his search for Jason's ghost.

There was no way that Jason didn't form a ghost with the amount of time exposed to Johnny's ectoplasmic self.

Kitty helped him search, everyone helped him search, even Phantom.

But he couldn't find his little brother.

----------------

Then he felt it.

He felt Jason come back to life.

He didn't know the details and he didn't care. All that mattered was that the kid was alive.

--------------

He tried to search the living realm for the kid, which would have been made a ton easier if the GIW wasn't shooting at him every ten minutes.

At some point he gave up looking and waited instead.

Jason would find his way home to Gotham at some point, all Johnny had to do was wait.

--------------

Johnny knew the second Jason stepped into the fair city of Gotham.

He broke many speeding limits and traffic laws on his way there but he didn't care.

Especially when he saw Jason on the streets, he looked different but Johnny would know that kid anywhere.

Johnny opened his mouth to call out.

But then Jason with him and his mouth snapped shut with a click.

There wasn't even a glimmer of recognition in Jason's eyes.

His brother didn't remember him.

the sillays

I JUST FUCKIN REALIZED

Why is Roy wearing the classic Red Fountain uniform??? Like I know he hung around RF in s5 but he always had a more unique and amphibious outfit and now he's just wearing the basic one??? Why are they trying to make Roy fit in with the boys when Nex and Thoren are walking around in Red

RIVEN SIGHTING!!!! REAL!!! NOT CLICKBATE!!!!

mean girl has a crush on local hero 📸

arranged marriage daminette but instead of being lovey dovey they're just chill about it but they never tell anyone

like one day mari goes "oh my husband likes this shade of green" and adrien's like "ur husband??? you're married??" and mari doesn't even bat an eyelash, "yeah i got kidnapped by assassins and was forced into a magical blood-bound marriage contract with their heir. we meet like a few times a year to clobber each other with swords and sewing needles. pretty fun."

meanwhile, the batfam can't figure out if damian's joking about his wife or not because there is no way he made it all up just to mess with them

also dami would just randomly go "i miss my wife"

"YOUR WHAT-"

Married?

A/N: This was based off of this post check it out. I hope I did it justice and y'all enjoy it. I will do a Part with Damian after this one.

@taewinterbear95 I hope you like it. Sorry it took me a while to write this out.

@maanae Here you go. I hope I did it justice.

@swaggermcjagger hope you like it!

~⚔~🧵~⚔~🧵~⚔~🧵~⚔~🧵~⚔~🧵~⚔~🧵~⚔~🧵~⚔~🧵~⚔~🧵~⚔~

Summary: Everyone finds out that Damian and Marinette are married and freak out.

It had been close to a year since the marriage ceremony between the heir of the League of Assasins and the Grand Guardian of the Order. Marinette and Damian have so far met twice in the time given that they are both straight out of high school and entering University. After the marriage ceremony Marinette had gone back to her usual days. Damian as well went back to going by his usual schedule. It was only at certain times that the two would call each other up and update the other on their everyday life. Marinette would tell him of the new design she has drawn up as well as the clients she is currently working with. Damian would tell her about his pets as well as the new rescues he has hiding from his father.

"Marinette are you ready to go," Adrien asked from her living room.

"Yes, I just need my bag," she said, grabbing her purse.

After making sure that the kwamis were safe and had their snacks the two of the headed out to buy some new fabric Marinette needed. Adrien had volunteered to help her carry the rolls of fabric and other stuff she needed in exchange for some pastries. The two of them chatted basically updating the other on their daily stuff. Once at the fabric shop Marinette made quick work on searching for the fabric.

"Who is the commission for this time," Adrien asked, looking at the colorful material.

"Uncle Jagged, he needs a suite for a wedding his is going to be attending," she said, finding a green material.

"Oh, my husband likes this shade of green. Maybe I should make him something," she said, picking up an emerald green fabric.

"Your husband? Wait you're married since when," Adrien said, shocked.

He tried to remember when Marinette had even started dating and nothing came up. No one had even mentioned her dating someone.

"Yes, I got kidnapped a while back by some assassins and was forced into a magical blood-bound marriage contract with their heir. We meet every chance we get and spare with swords and needles. It's pretty fun," she said, a sigh escaping her lips.

"Wait are you serious how come you never told anyone," Adrien asked, confused.

"It never came up," she said, grabbing some other fabrics.

After getting everything she needed they headed back to her apartment and dropped off her stuff. Chloe had called earlier complaining that they don't see each other enough and wanted to meet for lunch. Chloe had managed to take over her father's hotel and became a well-known businesswoman.

"Adrikins, Mari, you made it," Chloe greeted as the two of them walked into the hotel restaurant.

"Chloe, it's nice to see you too," Marinette said.

"Is everyone else here," Adrien asked, searching for the others.

"Yes, you two are the last ones," Chloe said.

Kagami, Luka, Nino and Alya sat at a table chatting before the other three walked to the table.

"I see you two finally made it," Alya smirked.

"Hello you two," Luka and Kagami greeted.

"Yo, Dude, Dudette finally," Nino grinned.

Adrien and Marinette took their seats and ordered food before catching up. Halfway thru the meal Marinette's phone went off.

"Ah, It's my husband I should answer this," Marinette said, answering her phone.

"Wait, did she say husband," Alya said, shocked.

"HUSBAND," Chloe gasped.

"Hello, Oh I see well I should have time off next week if you wish to come visit. I do not mind. I do have a commission I need to finish for Uncle Jagged. Oh then I shall see you in two days. Yes, I as well," Marinette said before hanging up the phone.

She looked up at her friends all of them with shocked and confused looks on their faces.

"Is something wrong," Marinette asked, confused.

"Since when have you been married," Nino asked, confused.

"I believe today would mark ten months," Marinette answered, taking a sip of her tea.

"How," Alya asked.

"Oh, I got kidnapped a while back by some assassins and was forced into a magical blood-bound marriage contract with their heir. Would you like to see a picture of him," she answered, taking out her phone and pulling up a photo of him.

"This is him; he is planning to visit in two days but would rather spend his time with me than with other people," she said, showing them the picture.

"Wait, Mari that is Damian Wayne. He is Bruce Wayne's son one of the riches man in Gotham," Chloe said, shocked.

"Leave it to Mari-hime to attract the rich," Kagami chuckled.

"Oh, I didn't know that," Marinette said.

"Do we get to meet him when he visits," Adrien asked.

"Of course, you are all family and he has to meet you sooner or later. Mama and Papa already love him," she answered.

"Wait, your parents already met him and know you are married," Alya said, shocked.

"Of course, who do you think supplies the kwamis with their snacks," Marinette said.

"Well, Dudette you sure know how to keep us on our toes," Nino chuckled.

They spent the rest of their day talking about how Marinette and Damian got to where they were and every other little detail leading to it.

Marinette, Lex Luthor's mother

It’s a crazy idea, but let’s imagine that Marinette and Felix are Lex Luthor’s biological parents.

Marinette was a loving mother. Lex loved his mom more than anything. He had a deep respect for his dad. However, his family life was chaotic, mostly because Felix was an asshole (to others, not to his family). As a result, they had many enemies.  

One day Lex’s parents disappeared in a plane crash, leaving him an orphan. As he was a very intelligent boy, he was adopted by the Luthor family who wanted a child. He was then 16 years old.

Angry, abandoned and alone, Lex became increasingly unstable. The loss of his parents left him with a big hole in his heart. To avoid suffering this kind of pain, he will close himself and think only about himself. All that matters is him. The rest? They are only pawns to serve him.

He eventually succeeded in taking control of the Luthor empire. He drove out his adoptive parents. He had no feelings towards these people.

 Several years passed.

During another alien invasion of Earth, Lex’s parents were resurrected by mistake.

 They will discover what their “baby” has become. Felix is laughing out loud. Marinette is FURIOUS.

Lex is going to be yelled at like a little boy for hours, in front of the heroes. And Lex won’t have a say in the matter. He is too shocked to see his parents alive and especially…. He’s not crazy to stand up to his mother. Even his father Felix, had NEVER dared to oppose his mother. “Father….mother?” “(Chuckles) I can’t believe you’ve become a villain cliché. *holds his stomach*… Oh kid, daddy is so proud.(Laughs)” “…..” “Felix… Stop laughing.” “*cough*” “I said …. Stop laughing.” “(suddenly shuts up)” Lex swallowed. Marinette slowly turned to Lex, then approached him. Suddenly she pulled his ear toward her.

“You little brat!!! You’ re in deep trouble! I DIDN’T RAISE YOU LIKE THAT!”

The Justice League stood there in absolute silence, completely fascinated by the scene before them.

Marinette forced Lex to apologize. (And Felix during all this time, observes his wife while doing his best not to laugh. He doesn’t want to have the wrath of his terrifying little wife against him.) No one will take him seriously after this.

I cannot get the idea of Marinette being an absolute menace on twitter with a shit post account and constantly making fun of celebrities

Especially Damian, she just posts cat photos with "This You?" under every single one of his posts

She ends up getting her account suspended for 'Harassing' Damian and he just tweets out that she wasn't harassing him and if he had an issue with it he would take care of it himself so they should just give her account back to her

When questioned about it he just says she grew on him like a fungus

She posts a hand drawn picture of a cat with mushrooms smiling under he post

He doesn't respond to it but everyone knows he saw it

Star Struck

It wasn’t the first hit that got to Marinette, she wasn’t that petty.  Not to mention, she’d had her fair share of accidents that ended up with the people around her getting pelted with random items.  She really was in no position to judge.  It wasn’t even the second hit that upset her.  It was the fourth hit with the paper that had been folded to look like a star that had gotten to her.  Four hits and no apologies, just mildly exasperated grunts each time, as if it had been an inconvenience to him that she had gotten hit.

Markov had scanned them and assured her they were unfamiliar to him, so it was unlikely to be a vendetta. His prevailing theory was that the man was just really bad at their game of table football.  But Marinette knew it had to be on purpose.  It had to be.  There was no other explanation for hitting her in the exact same spot every time.  If whoever was doing it had that kind of precision, surely they could get the star… ball… thing where it was supposed to go. Unless, where it was supposed to go was her head, which it had to be.

“Look on the bright side,” Alix offered, not bothering to conceal her laughter at the fourth imbedding itself into her hair, “if seeing a falling star is supposed to be lucky, being hit by four has to be a guarantee for a golden future, right?”

“Let’s just go,” Nino offered sympathetically.

“The movie is going to start soon anyway,” Max agreed.

They got up and turned toward the exit just in time to see another flying star coming directly toward Marinette’s head again.  She squawked and flinched back, tripping over a table leg and landing on her bottom just in time for the paper star to hit her in the head… again.

Keep reading

Teacher au where one of the bat kids and Marinette both end up becoming teachers at the same school, the subjects they teach are up to the writer.

I don't know why but the students of both teachers are now divided into a war, half think the two of them would make a cute couple, the other half refuse to let them get together, cause No! Its weird!

Cue the shippers setting up run ins with the two and the anti shippers running interference.

Scene:

*Batkid talking with anti shipper student when Marinette walks by*

Marinette: Hi! *Waves as she walks*

Batkid: Hey *Waves back with a smile*

Student, now panicking: No! Teach! *Grabs batkids face and pulls them down to their eye level* You need to stay focused! Stay focused! You CANNOT fall in love with her! I forbid it.

Batkid, removing their face from their students hands: First of all, I am your teacher, do not grab me like that. Second of all, I am not going to fall in love with Ms. Dupain-Cheng we are just coworkers...*Glances back out the door to see if they can see her again*

The entire class, anti shippers with dismay, shippers with glee: He's already in love with her!