you ever get surprised by your own recurring issues. like come on man. I thought we were past this.

this post is for broccoli fans ONLY 🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦🥦 broccoli i love you

anyone else ever wish they could lie down harder? Like, I'm already horizonal, but I need more horizonal. I need to be absorbed by the floor. I think that would fix me

baby me, observing other children eating fistfulls of randomly colored gummy bears all at once: when do i get to go back to my home planet

worst part about getting angry is how much it makes you want to be mean

sorry i said something dickish. a few mildly frustrating things happened to me in succession and it turned me evil

ping ponging back and forth between seeing immense beauty everywhere and feeling deeply like i am in hell

Perunan pyörittäminen = potaatio

It's a lot healthier to go for a daily walk than to sign up for a gym membership you won't be using because you hate that kind of exercise. It's a lot healthier to eat a frozen meal than to skip a meal because you were too tired to cook something healthy. It's a lot healthier to take a quick shower than to procrastinate an elaborate routine for days. Don't aim so high that you won't be hitting anything!

this is actually really helpful and affirming thanks

overwatch had the right idea when they made every sniper in the game weak to a gorilla that could leap to your position and beat you to death. i think this should be a more common game design choice for multiplayer games

I hate that SEPTember OCTOber NOVember and DECember aren’t the 7th, 8th, 9th, and 10th months.

Whoever fucked this up should be stabbed

Today’s your lucky day

MEAN GIRLS 2004 — dir. Mark Waters

why does this have 32k notes? it’s just a picture of a knife in a ranch bottle, is there some unspoken joke that 32 thousand people share? what is going on here, i dont get it. it’s just a fucking picture of a knife in a ranch bottle. is there some spiritual connection people have to this picture? is there some ominous and mystical reasoning that this has 32 thousand notes? do people reblog this because it makes them look like some indie blogger? or is there just something funny to this? someone please explain

no one tell him

This is it, lads. The post that started us on this path 9 years ago.

I sure hope no one told him.

adult life is truly just thinking “I NEED TO CLEAN” while dealing with the 17 other things that have a hard deadline

this post is exclusively for people with dirty rooms

this post is specifically for people who know their room is a mess, but their brain won't let them clean it. this post is for you. I love you and I see you