why is he even allowed to have a Twitter first of all..

me: *gets hit by a car* sorry

Blaise: You know that song that goes ‘apple bottom jeans’?

Pansy: Yes, why?

Blaise: It’s literally Draco

Blaise: I mean, he likes apples, he’s clearly a bottom, and he wears jeans.

Pansy: cONSPIRACY THEROY

ok but rather than literally anything on pottermore can we have an entire book about fred and george’s first few years at hogwarts

or a book on the maraurders?? like siriusly.

what if you cast a corporeal patronus for the first time and it was a minion

thanks to avps i will always have the headcanon that lucius malfoy is an impeccable ballet dancer

horror concept: instead of being a wizard, harry potter discovers that he is a clown, and must not attend honkwarts, the renowned clown school - but little does he know that the evil clown lord bozomort is trying to kill him

a Not Happy thought: the “you look so much like your father"s die off as harry gets older. by the time he’s thirty, he begins to miss it.

I WAS HAVING A SODDING GOOD DAY.

confession time: when I was younger and first read the harry potter books, I thought “exploding snap” was “exploding snape” and that all the students just hated snape so much that they made a game where he explodes.

Oh my Godric yes.

The thought of first year muggleborns not knowing who Voldemort is is my favourite thing. “That’s Harry Potter, he defeated You-know-Who!” “He defeated who?” “You-know-Who!” “…I don’t know who.”

Clueless firsties are the best 😘

The Boy Who Lived

ref timelapse

I legit GASPED.

HOLY SHIT.

HOLLLLLLLY FUCK.

A Typical Day In Class

Draco: *staring at Harry like always*

Harry: What are you staring at Malfoy?

Draco: Don’t try that ass with me Potter

Draco: ….

Harry: Oh staring at my ass were you?

Draco: Uh… Of course not Potter I clearly meant sass so don’t try and get sassy with me

Draco: It was clearly your fault anyways

Draco: Even just being in your presence I can feel my intelligence dropping

Draco: *talking to himself* Yep that’s it

Draco: Nice save Draco

Draco: I totally wasn’t looking at his arse

Draco: Even if it is a great ass I definitely wasn’t looking

Draco: Ha idiot Potter I was actually staring at his perfect chiselled Jawline all along

Draco: Fooled Potter once again

Harry: Draco, I can still hear you

Draco: … For fuck sake Potter always around when you’re not wanted

Draco: *whispering to himself* I didn’t mean that, I always want you

In Potions Class

Slughorn: Amortentia smells like the person you love!

Draco: *sniffs* I know I’m gorgeous Potter but you don’t need to stand so close I can hardly smell the potion cause of your peasant scent is clogging my nostrils.

Harry: I’m on the other side of the classroom Malfoy.

Draco: *sweats nervously*

hp meme [6/10] characters ϟ neville longbottom “neville’s mother had come edging down the ward in her nightdress. she no longer had the plump, happy-looking face harry had seen in moody’s old photograph of the original order of the phoenix. her face was thin and worn now, her eyes seemed overlarge and her hair, which had turned white, was wispy and dead-looking. she did not seem to want to speak, or perhaps she was not able to, but she made timid motions towards neville, holding something in her outstretched hand. 'again?’ said mrs longbottom, sounding slightly weary. ‘very well, alice dear, very well - neville, take it, whatever it is.’ but neville had already stretched out his hand, into which his mother dropped an empty drooble’s best blowing gum wrapper.‘very nice, dear,’ said neville’s grandmother in a falsely cheery voice, patting his mother on the shoulder. but neville said quietly, ‘thanks, mum.’ his mother tottered away, back up the ward, humming to herself. neville looked around at the others, his expression defiant, as though daring them to laugh, but harry did not think he’d ever found anything less funny in his life.'well, we’d better get back,’ sighed mrs. longbottom, drawing on long green gloves. 'very nice to have met you all. neville, put that wrapper in the bin, she must have given you enough of them to paper your bedroom by now.'but as they left, harry was sure he saw neville slip the sweet wrapper into his pocket.“