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POLARIS.

@beijixiing / beijixiing.tumblr.com

[ Independent RP blog for Pokémon Coordinator Zoey; slightly canon divergent. Just slay me, I have no self control ]
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[ holy shit i’m done with all the #letsbuild asks sadlfkgdjf

BRB GOING TO GO DO THIS ON @TOTENTCNZ ]

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Anonymous asked:

What kind of regulations are there for fossil Pokemon, on contest terms and just regular keeping and earning?

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      “The rules used to be unbelievably strict. At first it was only that one zoo for extinct species in Kanto that was allowed to own them, since it was the research center where revival of Fossil Pokémon was first achieved. But as with all secrets, this one got out, and soon fossil Pokémon were being used for everything from military development to, yes, Pokémon battling and even Contests. I have to admit, it’s somewhat of a shame that such innovations in technology have to go toward entertainment, and I myself wouldn’t pay for a freshly restored Fossil. But Fossil Pokémon are common enough today that you could get one from a breeder. Most of them work from a single restored Pokémon--and you need a special license to own one of those--and some of them are lucky enough to own a pair so that they can produce purebreds. But the vast majority of Fossils used in entertainment today are crossbred and show some striking differences to their original counterparts. It’s because of these differences that the law says you don’t need a fossil permit to own one of those, just a Rare Species permit like one you might get for a Lapras or a Snorlax. For some Fossil Pokémon you also need a Dangerous Species permit, such as Aerodactyl or Tyrantrum.”

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      “As for the odd Fossil Pokémon here and there that actually managed to survive the extinction…well, in principle, they’re supposed to be protected, and many of them benefit from the law of protection. But poaching is such a problem--especially since the International Pokémon League itself doesn’t have a law against using poached fossil Pokémon. In fact, they like it when people use ‘living fossils’ because they always get a spike in ratings. And since the last country to ban airing the Pokémon League over illegal fossils had a nationwide riot because of that, I doubt anything will be done about it anytime soon.”

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❮◉❯ Can you tell us about the different types of Gyarados?

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      “Sure thing. Gyarados is my favorite Pokémon that I’ve never used, you know,” she says, completely oblivious to the fact that a decade or so down the road she will be getting and using LITERALLY THE MOST OVERPOWERED GYARADOS ON THE FACE OF THE PLANET. “It’s an important symbol in Sinnohese culture–it represents order, the bringing of rain, personal excellence and the ruler of our country, and we even have a special breed for it called the Imperial. The breed was created during the Qin Dynasty, when the first emperor tamed wild Gyarados for the first time in Sinnoh and they produced a golden Gyarados with a power beyond anything ever seen from a Gyarados before. She was the first Imperial, and all Imperial Gyarados alive today are her descendants–we know this for a fact because court records have been very well-kept. Even today their powers are beyond anything else we know in the species, and they’re enough to keep minor Legendaries such as Darkrai at bay. They were bred for that purpose so they could protect our country from anything. And while there have been a few, ah, slip-ups, they do great work if there’s a strong connection between them and a competent Emperor!”

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      “There are all sorts of Gyarados all over the world, too. The Imperial actually comes from crossbreeding the ocean Gyarados and a Sinnohese species called the Yellow River Gyarados, which is named not only for its place of origin but also for its golden scales. Yellow River and other freshwater species tend to be more Special Attack instead of Attack oriented and learn a wider variety of support moves, but most importantly they have the wisdom and regal temperament that Sinnoh has revered. Other than that? There are blind cave-dwelling Gyarados that are Rock/Water instead of Water/Flying, and they live in the sinkhole cave systems in tropical forests. There are mountain Gyarados that aren’t Water-type at all, but have fully evolved for a life on land–they’re usually Flying-type, but their secondary type can range from Grass to Ice to even Bug. And have you ever seen a Spiritually Reverting ghost Gyarados? They’re just beautiful–I’d kill to see one of an Imperial!”

       Oh, Zoe, if only you knew…

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❮◉❯ What do Pokedollars look like and why does the whole world have a universal currency?

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      “See, this is why you should actually help me with handling the money, because then you wouldn’t have to ask me such a basic question,” she said, shaking her head at her irresponsible piece of shit husband. Pulling a Pokédollar out her pocket, she began to explain.

      “The universal currency project was carried out as a result of worries about exchange rates affecting international relations and the international economy. Which is why here on the back, there’s an image of world leaders gathering together to pass the law of creating one in the first place. On the whole, the designs are based on the Unimese dollar, and they feature portraits of important historical personages--for example, the hundred-dollar ones have Ceraeion Fieorel, the fifty-dollar ones Ghetsis Harmonia, and the twenty-dollar ones have three versions, each of which features an Arceitic Reformer. The one-dollar bills like this one are my favorite--as a nod to how universal Pokémon battling has become, they are all printed with random images of national Champions and other famous figures in Pokémon entertainment history.” 

       She pulled another bill out of her pocket to illustrate her point.

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      “Have you ever seen the one of you?”

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[worldbuilding] + Sinnohese sport, both domestic and international >:3

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      “Internationally? We are the greatest. Chinese Sinnohese athletes and Pokémon handlers have won more awards in international competitions than any other country in the world. Even you Unovese, who put such pride in their own athletics–I’m almost sorry to say it, but you can’t compare. But domestically…” She sighs. “It’s another story entirely.”

       “I’ll tell you right now–the main reason we hold the title we do is because we have sacrificed for it, and sacrificed too much. We don’t need the current system to maintain our hold as the best nation in the world for Pokésports, and I intend to make myself living proof of that, but in the end, I’ll still have been a product of an exploitative system that should never have existed in the first place. The state schools are nothing short of abusive, and they encourage handlers to be the same with their Pokémon. In fact, the Sinnohese National Team was investigated for Pokémon rights abuses, and seeing as a good part of the International Pokémon League is in Sinnoh’s pocket, you know something’s wrong when even they rule us fit for investigation. The Sinnohese team model is often toxic, too–most of the time we’re friendly with each other, but the way our pay is tied to our performance, it encourages competition among teammates instead of cooperation. And as for domestic circuits themselves, the only ones that really matter to people are the Sinnoh League, the Grand Festival and certain pre-national-ranked Contests–if you’re not part of one of those, you’re not worth anything to people as a Trainer. In other words, we have the best results and the best reputation, but the structure supporting it is rotten.”

      She looks Roxie in the eye, her voice and gaze full of purpose.

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      “And I’m going to be the one who fixes that.”

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Anonymous asked:

❮◉❯ If humans aren't pokemon, then where do they come from?

     “That’s a question most scientists are debating as well. Humans are the only naturally Q-type species on Earth. Many Pokémon have been proven to have Q-type form changes, but humans are the only ones whose inherent type is Q--that is, except for Aura-sensitives, who are Fighting-type, and Psychics, who are Psychic type. Arceists will say that it’s because humans are special and chosen by Arceus to be special, since Arceus Himself is Q-type and we are the species closest to him. But reliable sources will tell you that we Q-types are so rare because the typing itself does not allow for many abilities. Even though Q-type conversions still allow a Pokémon to use some of their moves, inherent Q-types can't use typed moves, which hardly compensates for its ability to drive off spirits and its resistance to any Type in terms of giving an edge to survival. In other words? Arceus’ special type is useless when it comes to practical application.”

      [Mun note: Q-type = ???-type.]

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reblogged

|| y o  so since i’ve been having an absolute shit week and a half, I’m gonna go cheer myself up with some worldbuilding c: This means I’m going to do the #LetsBuild replies I’ve been owing for months on @beijixiing and if I get them done today, I’ll do a #LetsBuild call on here. I said I guaranteed a reply to everyone who sent a message in the #LetsBuild thing, and so I will, even if it’s long overdue. Please note that this doesn’t mean @beijixiing will be coming off hiatus–I’m doing this thing because it’s what I promised.

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Okay, I gotta do it. I gotta put Zoe and Ursula on hiatus.

I’m seriously losing muse for these two now that I had ideas for two new muses that I want to rp…one is Zinnia @dragonxascent and the other is a Herald of Yveltal blog whose link I will link to once I’m finished.

I’m not saying these blogs are gonna be dead forever. In the future I know I’ll swing back to the Coordie muses again, but this is for until I get muse back again. All threads I have now with people can either be archived or continued over Skype. I’m sorry to have to announce things like this especially since there’s so many headcanons and plotlines that are still unresolved but…New Muse Syndrome is causing the old ones to feel kinda bleh.

What I’ll still be posting, though, are the #LetsBuild asks I never got to and the OP Pokémon from the gifting memes I never completed. I’ve been owing those for months and I really want to follow through on the promise, even though it’s long overdue.

See y’all round,

~Tian

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Have you ever been to earth?

On earth, we use the word “burrito” to describe a tortilla filled with things you eat. Pretty simple stuff, and I’m surprised you at least got that part right. My burrito was, in fact, filled with food. In this, you and I agree and are friends. But this is also where my lifelong hatred begins for you and anyone else whose brain has been repeatedly scrubbed with the same mixture of bleach and Pop Rocks as yours has. Because that should have killed you, but left you around long enough to do what you did to me today. Let me explain:

You’re an idiot.

Let me further explain:

Burritos are eaten from one end to the other. So that means when you assemble a burrito with motherfucking ZONES of ingredients going that direction, you create a disgusting experience for the burrito’s end user. When you make a burrito, you should put the ingredients in layerslengthwise. That way, every bite has AT LEAST A FUCKING CHANCE of getting at least two types of ingredients, and there is little chance of becoming almost hopelessly trapped in a goddamned cilantro cavern.

Have you ever eaten one of the things you make all fucking day? You should try one. They are pretty good WHEN YOU ARE NOT WILLING YOURSELF THROUGH THE FUCKING EMPIRE OF SOUR CREAM ONLY TO END UP IN LETTUCE COUNTRY.

When you eat a burrito, you don’t stand it up and bite down on it lengthwise like a fucking Rancor. Humans can’t usually dislocate their jaws, and I’m not a fucking pelican. But you must think that’s how it’s done, since that would be THE ONLY FUCKING WAY to take a bite of your crapstrosity and have it taste like a burrito.

And guess what else, player? You probably can’t guess anything, because I’m pretty sure you’re just a mop with a hat on it that fell over and spilled some shit into a tortilla, but just in case, here’s what:

Humans also don’t eat burritos like fucking corn on the cob. Like a fucking typewriter from one end to the other a little at a time and then DING next line. But today I wish I had tried that. Because at least THEN I would be able to eat some rice, then beans, then be all like HEY BEANS I’LL BE RIGHT BACK JUST GOING OVER HERE TO THE GUACAMOLE FOR A SECOND.

Nope.

My experience was more like HEY BEANS IT’S JUST GOING TO BE YOU AND I FOR A MINUTE UNTIL I CAN FUCKING EXCAVATE THE RICE FROM BENEATH YOU BUT BY THEN YOU WILL BE A FADING MEMORY OH HEY I WAS WRONG I’M IN THE FUCKING CHEESEOSPHERE NOW RICE MUST BE NEXT I HOPE IT’S NOT ANOTHER FUCKING SALSA POCKET.

You built this thing like a fucking pack of LifeSavers.

And don’t even fucking think I’m about to open this shit up and re-engineer your nonsense 90 degrees. I ALREADY PUT A HOLE IN IT WITH MY FUCKING MOUTH. YEAH. THAT’S HOW I DISCOVERED YOU FUCKING SUCK AT LOOKING AT THINGS. I AM NOT GOING TO DO FUCKING TORTILLA ORIGAMI TO GET THIS SHIT BACK TOGETHER, ONLY TO END UP WITH A BURRITO THAT’S BEEN SHOT IN THE GUT AND IS BLEEDING YOUR INEPTITUDE.

What’s that? I should ask you to mix it up first next time? IS THIS JAMBA JUICE? I DON’T WANT TO DRINK MY FUCKING BURRITO THROUGH A BENDY STRAW, AND I DON’T WANT A PILE OF BURRITO SOUP IN A FLOUR CAN.

I just want a burrito.

In conclusion:

You’re the worst thing that has ever happened to the universe, you owe everyone everywhere an apology for this burritobomination, and I hope your babies look like monkeys.

UPDATE FOR EVERYONE WHO SAID “JUST EAT IT WITH A FORK”:

A fucking fork?

I DIDN’T ORDER THE FUCKING COBBURRITO SALAD.

If anyone ever handed me a burrito with a fork, THEY WOULD BE WEARING A BRAND NEW BURRITO HAT FROM MY FALL COLLECTION TEN SECONDS LATER.

That’s like buying a car and having them hand you a fucking wrench with the keys. Like YEAH WE KNOW THIS MOTHERFUCKER’S GOING TO EXPLODE AND BE SPREAD ACROSS EIGHT LANES AS SOON AS YOU HIT THE GAS, BUT SHIT, WE GAVE YOU A WRENCH, SO BE COOL.

Jesus already gave me two burrito forks. One at the end of each arm. They’re called fucking HANDS.

A fork. My god. I haven’t cried since I was six, but I’m fucking sobbing now.

People eat burritos with forks?

God is sorry he made us.

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songofages

I’ve never had a burrito but at least now I know how to eat one.

Every time I see this post, I have to re read the entire thing. It’s like a spiritual experience.

Source: medium.com
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[ ag h

now that zin is back i’m losing so much muse for zoe and ursula it’s unrea l ]

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[ so pokémon go is out and i’m pretty sure i missed the announcement because I was too busy RPing Pokémon on Tumblr

I’m so addicted to tumblr that even by the standards of internet addicts who have no life I have no life

b ury   m e  ]

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