Fact: The earliest reliably dated use of the phrase “fucked up” appears in the court records of a US Navy court-martial case from 1863; the way the phrase is used suggests that its meaning was already well known at the time, but this is the first known printed record of it that we can confidently put a date to.

Additional fact: Bram Stoker’s Dracula is set in 1897.

Conclusion: It would not anachronistic for your Dracula fanfic to have a character describe the Count as a fucked up old man.

official linguistics post

I love reading about recipe fails like this as much as the next home cook, but seriously, y'all. Before you can substitute something in cooking, you have to understand what it's actually doing in the recipe. You can look up 'egg substitution' and get a whole list of things, but whether it will be a successful sub depends on if it is replacing the original ingredient's job, not just its general characteristics. There are recipes where a mashed banana actually does work instead of egg. I've done it. Custard is not going to be one of those recipes. Usually the failure comes because people think in dietary terms when they should be thinking about function. In a recipe where egg is primarily providing support and stability, you have to look for a sub that will provide support and stability. Sometimes it's not a 1-1 sub. A powdered sub might provide the stability, but egg also is adding to the moisture content, which you'll have to take into account and add in another form. Replacing a protein with another protein only works when the presence of protein is important, like if another ingredient is acting on it to Do a Chemistry. You can't just look up a list of subs and pick whatever you like best/have on hand. You have to understand the sciency-part. Depending on what you are making, that part can be really really important. There are some ingredients with unique properties that cannot me subbed in certain recipes because the recipes are capitalizing on that ingredient's unique properties. Replacing those ingredients sometimes requires so much work and so many special substitutions, you're not really making the same thing in the end and it's just not worth the effort. Sometimes, you just don't get to have The Thing.

I'm poor and allergic to a lot of stuff, so I've had many substituting adventures, some more successful than others. My mother and I are diabetic, so while we're not doing hardcore keto, keto recipes provide us with safer-for-us options sometimes. But my mom is newer to keto than I am and is still in that stage where she's trying to make 'keto versions' of very not keto friendly things and is spending a lot of time and money on it. And I've had to just gently lay a hand on her arm and whisper, 'Momma, you're just going to have to do without. It's not worth it.'

Regardless:

Stop leaving comments or negative reviews on recipes where you change the fundamental ingredients. That's not a failure on the recipe's part, it's a failure on yours.

Your best bet is to learn how to cook, not just how to make recipes. There is a difference. When you understand what you're doing and why, changing things up becomes soooo much easier. And potentially saves you a lot of time and money and frustration when you can tell at a glance that, 'Yeah, I'm not going to me able to make that work. I just can't have that.'

The first funny bitch was Cain, who straight up lied to God after killing his brother.

God: where’s Abel?

Cain: fuck if I know??? I’m not in charge of him

It is TRAGIC that you can’t read this in the original Hebrew.

God:  Where’s the Sheepkeeper?

Cain: Do I LOOK like a Brotherkeeper? 

God: hey where’s Abel???

Cain:

He killed his yonger brother in cold blood because he was jealous of him. There is in no way anything funny about this. No hesitation just poped a rock over his turned head, droped his body over the edged and tried to lie to god about what he did. FUCK YALL CRAZIES!!!

oh are those the receipts, Cain is problematic now?

Cainceled 

This post gets worse every reblog

yet im not Abel to scroll past

This post hit me like a rock to the head

This is the quality content that keeps me on Tumblr

It makes me happy when they listen

things to update after a legal name change!

*Please add to this list if you can think of anything else!!!

#1 thing I notice trans people forget to change after just a social name change is their voicemail recording!

email accounts, mailing lists, email signature, various online accounts u put ur name on like streaming services or youtube

i want to share with you some of my favourite graffiti from Pompeii

I’ve always loved these. Humanity has never fucking changed.

the guy who wrote “if anyone does not believe in Venus, they should gaze at my gf” drank XTREME respect women juice

My ideal aesthetic is what I'm calling "sexy tomboy". That is to say, I am 100% femme through and through, but I want to look like what a straight man's idea of a "masculine woman" is. I wanna be masc in the way that LaCroix is fruit flavored, just a little extra something to make things a little more interesting

This you?

I don't think I'll ever recover from this one

epic... rap battles of history..... puppy .......................versus..................... kitty......................... BEGIN!!!!

everyone go home this is the only good addon to this post

I hate work I should be at the (remembers I don't want to go to the club) the imagination

It’s time again

“Tunak Tunak Tun” (Punjabi: ਤੁਣਕ ਤੁਣਕ ਤੁਣ) or “Tunak”, is a bhangra/pop love song by Indian artist Daler Mehndi released in 1998. At the time, critics complained that Mehndi’s music was only popular due to his videos that featured beautiful women dancing. Mehndi’s response was to create a video that featured only himself.

also gosh the lyrics to this are actually really sweet & great i never realised

I don’t wanna get involved in the drama I just wanna know 103% of the information on what happened

I laughed so fucking hard at this

Phone cases, stickers, magnets and more available on teepublic

Bags, coasters, pillows and more available on redbubble

i actually dont mind tumblr posts reposted to pinterest. the 13 y/o "pinterest in the only social media my parents let me have" girlies deserve a little treat

OH MY GOD

now all of pinterest knows i have large ballz

Think about this quote like all the time and how it really undermines so much shit in capitalism

Image transcript:

“But what will you do with the lazy man, the man who does not want to work?” inquires your friend.

That is an interesting question, and you will probably be very much surprised when I say that there is really no such thing as laziness. What we call a lazy man is generally a square man in a round hole. That is, the right man in the wrong place, And you will always find that when a fellow is in the wrong place, he will be inefficient or shiftless. For so-called laziness and a good deal of inefficiency are merely unfitness, misplacement. If you are compelled to do the thing you are unfitted for by your inclinations or temperament, you will be inefficient at it; if you are forced to do work you are not interested in, you will be lazy at it.

End transcript

–Alexander Berkman, "What is Communist Anarchism?: Will Communist Anarchism Work?" (1929)