the hungering hearts

circle II: lust

They don’t spend hours discussing the news from the papers like they used to, and he doesn’t let other people into the attic if she’s there.

Instead, they circle each other. Until they can’t any longer.

kanej vampire au/ read on ao3/ch. I

Against all of his instincts, he leaves her - sleeping with a blissed-out smile on her face, curled in his bed - and goes out to deal with the situation at hand. There are people to be killed, a crisis to be averted, and he does just that. He’s not sure exactly what happens though, because his body is going through the motions seemingly by itself. It would do him well to examine it, to marvel at the speed and the strength and the precision of his movements, the extraordinary way the world seems to slow down just for him. People are moving like flies trapped in honey and he has all the time in the world to snap their necks. It doesn’t even require any effort. The blood he spills is no temptation and no distraction.

At some point, he finds himself all alone, hands all red. When he enters the Slat back through the door that had been wide-open and crammed with spectators when the Lions knocked, he finds the hallways and corridors deserted. All he can hear are the frantic heartbeats behind closed doors.

The door to Haskell’s office is bolted up for good measure.

He comes back to the attic and she’s still asleep, so he carries her to her room, closes the door firmly and fishes for a case of disgusting, hand-rolled cigars from his drawers, smoking for the rest of the night. The next day, he goes about his business and deliberately avoids even looking in her direction. He makes himself busy, fills up his calendar. Hires and fires. Smokes more. Keeps his window locked.

He throws all his will into keeping the desk, or a wall, or another person between them at all times, and it's still all for naught.

It’s all useless.

He can still taste her on his tongue. And no amount of distance can seem to erase the sensation from his memory. Perfection. Light and clear, ringing through him. The smell of her, blooming on his tongue like a flower, deep and sweet and pure. The feel of her, all slumped and trusting in his arms, sighing and moaning into the crook of his neck, when she couldn’t keep herself upright anymore.

The clarity of his mind when he drank from her.

He didn’t even know that it was possible to taste something so delicious. Nobody he has ever fed on - the drunks, the working girls, the street rats - tasted like her, felt like her. They were something to kill to hunger, not something to relish. And getting to bite Inej made him realize that he’s been surviving on stale water his whole life when she’s a fine red wine. There is no comparison.

No wonder he couldn't stop. Barely stopped, barely managed to reign himself in and, when he tore his mouth away from her, she was already pale and shaky. It terrified him to the core, this lack of control. It did nothing to stop his desire.

So now he knows. And he can't forget it or unlearn it. It’s no longer just a physical need, something to ignore or satisfy. It’s a craving. His eyes linger on the hollow of her throat and his mouth waters. She's so close, ripe for picking. When he closes his eyes, she’s all he can see - her wrist pressed to his mouth, her eyes pleading. His Wraith, his spider. His most trusted, most trustworthy second. His - friend, as he begrudgingly has to admit. His friend with her good, honest heart, who will never be just a friend ever again.

Who would not say no to him ever again. He watches her neck, the blood thumping underneath her skin, and she watches his mouth, eyes dark, lips parted. She sways towards him whenever he enters the room; turns towards him as if she were a flower and he the sun. The only thing that stops him from putting his hands on her and throwing her down like a shot is that he still harbors some hope it'll pass. He'll go back to feeding on low lives. Her body will flush out the poison.

And she will pay off her indenture one day, leave Ketterdam, leave him. She will forget, move on to some better things, greater things like the little Suli idealist she is. Have her open road, light heart, a boring husband and some squealing babies. She will fit herself neatly within the box of her old life and live it, the way she should’ve from the start And he will either die or drown the taste of her in cheap liquor, burn it from his mouth. Burn himself to forget her, if that’s what he has to do.

That’s what he’s promising to himself. That’s what he’s trying to make himself believe.

******read more on ao3*****

the hungering hearts

chapter I: limbo

when is a monster not a monster? oh, when you love it.

kanej vampire au/ read on ao3

The man in Kaz's arms does not struggle.

At least not much, which is good, because he doesn't think he would be able to stop him if he really tried to get away. He postponed the hunt for too long and now he can barely stand straight, weak as a kitten. Needs a cane to get around, needs his reputation to be his shield. Fortunately, he thinks people can sense it, somehow, that he’s off-kilter. Paler. Shakier. Fragile.

A thing to avoid at all cost; a thing to turn your eyes away from before it can catch you staring.

But the man is even weaker - drunk, stinking of cheap, burning liquor and piss. When he saw Kaz stalking, fangs out, he tried to escape and stumbled down on the ground on his own feet; covered his face with his hands, trembling head-to-toe and mumbling for mercy or some other nonsense. Kaz grabs him by the neck, pulls away the collar of his shirt and latches onto the thick vein and the man waves his arms a bit, trashing from pain but he calmes down soon enough. Some faint, keening sound escapes from his mouth and then he turns quiet, pliant, just sighing when Kaz swallows. His will to escape flows out of him with every drop of blood.

They are hidden in the shadows, in a narrow alleyway behind a now-closed bar, and the dawn is yet to crack. Kaz doesn't have to hurry, doesn't have to keep alert. He's free to take as much as he needs. But, even through his vapid hunger and the haze of sating it, the blood tastes foul in his mouth. The man is probably sick, diseased, like a mold-covered bottle of badly-aged wine. It’s barely better than feeding on a rat. He will do for now, but Kaz will not linger on him.

He never lingers anyway. Not a lot of pure blood to have in the Barrel, even less on his usual hunting grounds. No matter whom he chooses, they tend to leave a bad taste in his mouth.

He licks the wound to close it and lets the drunk drop to the ground. The man's face is smooth and serene, eyes rolled over, whites showing. Poor bastard, Kaz thinks with no real pity. He's gonna chase this high for the rest of his life. Walking around the town at night, begging for someone to dry him.

Or maybe not. Maybe he was too drunk to remember it. Maybe all he will wake up with will be a faint linger of bliss, half-registered. Either way, Kaz does not let him see his face; he pulls his hat lower over his eyes and exits the alleyway as fast as he can without raising suspicions. His leg does not hurt. His head is clear.

He licks his lips and pushes his tongue against the tip of his canine, blunt and human again.

It's gonna be a good day.

**continue reading on ao3**

kanej author recs | LinearA

Notable/Favorite works:

Rating(s): E / Quirks: Developing to Established Kanej, A/B/O elements, smut

Rating: T / Quirks: Established Kanej, Anti-Kerch's Prison System, angst

kanej author recs | Whitherward

Notable/Favorite works:

roomy, and drenched in sunlight

Rating: M / Quirks: Broke-Up Kanej/Developing Kanej, (Heavy) Angst with a Happy Ending, Kanej's Children

save the undone years

Rating: M / Quirks: Developing Kanej, Angst with a Happy Ending, WWI AU

Third Army! We have a mission for you, if you choose to accept it. We have created a campaign trailer for S3 and the mission is as follows:

1. Download the trailer from

2. Comment with it under every Netflix tweet while adding the campaign hashtags #SaveShadowAndBone #SixOfCrowsSpinoff

3. The mission starts today and lasts for a week

A trailer for the spin-off will be released in a week.

"Nikolai had been told that hope was dangerous, had been warned of it many times. But he’d never believed that. Hope was the wind that came from nowhere to fill your sails and carry you home."

I thought I'd never see

Inspired by the breathtaking fic save the undone years by Whitherward @whatanybodygets which is an AU about Kaz and Inej during WW1 where Kaz is a soldier and Inej is a nurse. This moment that stuck with me:

“All this waiting, and his brother appears at his bedside like a ghost in the night. [...] [Captain Reitveld] simply drops onto the edge of Kaz’s mattress and yanks him forward by the shoulders, wrapping him into a tight hug.

She sees Kaz go tense for a moment, and then relax, bury his face into his brother’s shoulder.

And then he begins to sob."

Been working on this for a month. I can't put into words how beautiful of a writer she is. I am always in awe and must drop everything for it.

Bonus: process

Corporal K. Reitveld and Nurse Ghafa, 1917

Inspired by the beautiful fic save the undone years by Whitherward @whatanybodygets

" ... she only sits beside him on the wall, and looks out at the scrubby grass, and the birds, and the grey clouds, while he smokes his fill. And then she helps him get upright, and hands him his crutches, and walks beside him in watchful silence as he limps his way painfully back to the ward."

Saw this pic of nurse and soldier actually months ago in May and decided to draw it after beautiful chapter 2. Let's ignore that Kaz is supposed to be in pajamas. He looks great in uniform.

Bonus: process

althought I wanted to finish these while it was winter , it’s still snowing here so  here, some warmly dressed folks!

@whatanybodygets and her friends.

E; 10/11

Chapter 10: White Tile, Dawn

For a dreadful moment he thinks he’ll find Wylan in the bed, so determined to be in the way that he’d give up Jesper’s company. But the bedroom is empty, the banked coals faint and pale within the grate. It’s chilly; even if she wants to go straight to sleep, it might as well be warm, so he stoops and wakes the fire. When it’s burning, he turns to her. She hasn’t moved, not to the bed, not towards the warmth he’s rousing. But she’s looking at him.

“I’m dirty,” she says. “I want a bath.”

The fire warms the silence between them. There’s pale light behind the curtains.

“Yes, little miss,” he says.

NEW YEARS CLEAN-UP 🎊

ok, so i had a bit too much nervous energy last year and posted most of the sets i wanted to make. which you would think would leave me with nothing else to post, but that's not technically true. most of these are from shadow and bone a few pre/post season, and one tua. there's no rhyme or reason. i just had a time giffing last year.... iykyk.

ain't no mountain (high enough)

Summary:

#no trauma AU #everyone is alive AU #Jordie Rietveld Lives #Family Drama #Wedding Fluff #Alternate Universe - 1950s(but very vaguely)#POV Multiple #POV Outsider #Kaz Brekker gets to have a mom #Inej Ghafa gets to be a blushing bride #awkward dinnertime conversations #cottagecore au #everyone is ooc because they are happy and mentally healthy #mentions of human trafficking #Culture Clashes #heirloom jewelry #all comfort no hurt #Happiness because they deserve it

LIJ AND TWO TOWNS OVER

The wedding is to take place on the Rietvelds' farm, two towns over from Lij. The banns are read in church a month before the set date; when the names of the bride and the groom are announced, a collective gasp spreads through the congregation like wind through a wheat field.

Soon enough, a small Suli caravan arrives in horse-drawn wagons, intricately painted in yellows and reds. Their women wear veils on their heads and their children are dressed in all manner of colorful clothes that the quaint Kerch countryside has never seen before. Ilke, the miller’s daughter, falls out of her window in her attempts to get a better look, getting a broken leg for all her efforts (but then again, Karl, the shoemaker says to anyone who would listen, she was never the shiniest apple on a branch, if you know what I mean). They set up a camp by the forest edge, on the border of Rietvelds’ and van Graafs' fields. The children sneak in closer to gawk at them and their parents pretend that they don’t notice it.

It is said that the younger Rietveld boy met his bride in Ketterdam, during his studies at the University, but what the girl was doing there no one knows and the tongues waggle feverishly.

There is, of course, a leading hypothesis, because what else could a Suli girl be doing in a big city, but the voices hush wherever even a strand of hair on Theresa Rietveld’s head shows up. Everyone and their mother knows she is very protective of her younger son and she doesn’t tend to hold her words back whenever she feels his character is judged unfairly (and she feels so fairly often, according to the general opinion of her neighbors. Insufferable woman. But who could blame her for placing all of her hopes in Kazimir, after Jordan– )

Whoever she is and whatever she did back in Ketterdam, there is one thing everyone can agree on when it comes to Miss Inej Ghafa:

She’s so pretty, the little girls sigh and their fathers nod and their mother shake their heads.

The bride-to-be rides in the wagon leading the procession down the dusty country roads, all dressed up with ribbons and paper-mache lanterns and flowers. Sitting underneath the garland of red geraniums, she is as radiant as the sun, a light-yellow veil spilling down her dark hair and a sheer scarf around her shoulders. She doesn’t rouge her cheeks or lips like the bolder local girls do and she doesn’t wear curls. Her beauty is a quiet, intriguing one, not drawing attention but making it hard to pull one’s eyes away once they find her. She watches everything, wide-eyed, and Lij watches her right back.

She meets their stares, openly. Boldly.

************read more on ao3**************

guys why the fuck aren't we talking about what's happening in the uk right now

nobody outside the uk is talking about this. why is nobody talking about it

prev!!!!!!

again, i know it's depressing and i'm sorry for putting negative stuff on everyone's dash but it's so fucking frustrating that nobody is talking about this because if nobody listens to us then nothing will happen and nothing will change, please please please start speaking up

it got worse 😁

source: pinknews

spread the word, scream, shout, TALK. we will scream ourselves hoarse before we roll over and let this happen.

And even worse, Keir Starmer, the leader of the Labour Party (the opposition and nominally left-wing party) has expressed agreement with Sunak on this

Whilst in most (or at least many) other countries overt transphobia is largely restricted to the right, with the left either supporting trans rights or at least not officially taking overtly transphobic positions, in England (which dominates the UK government) open transphobia has bipartisan support

It's still true that the majority of the population reject overt transphobia when polled, but nonetheless there is no major political party at the national level willing to stand up for our rights

also write to your MP and tell them you don't fucking agree with this shit. do anything you can to interrupt the comfortable delusion they are representing what the majority of people in this country actually want.

in my garden just hieronymusly sloshed off these earthly delights

Jealousy | A Six of Crows Animatic

Criminal Kaz Brekker asks his righthand woman Inej to join him on a heist to pose as a mistress of an ambassador they are trying to expel. But under the surface, Inej struggles to understand why Kaz has asked her to join on the mission, while Kaz refuses to admit his true feelings for her.

I made animatic based off the kanej fan fiction “Serves You Right” Chapter 5 By LinearA @linearao3. Even though we can’t get soc spinoff, I’ll make fan stuff still!

Also, I got into animation grad school and this was for a storyboarding class :)

So this is what I’ve been working for the past month. Was really hard to keep this a secret after Shadow and Bone cancelled. An ode to one of my all time favorite chapters of a fanfic. The visuals still stick with me now and it begs to be turned cinematic. 

For this storyboard, I edited some lines to make it more accessible to wider audience than soc and. Did lots of research on opera and tried to choose songs roughly in 17th century. So fun to make a soundtrack with whatever I wanted tho :)

You can see a broadview on my website

Or in slidedeck form.

You can also view on youtube.

For my past fanart of LinearA's "Serves You Right" click here

@socdaily | NO MOURNERS EVENT day 2: favorite relationship | kanej ↪ crooked kingdom | chapter 12 | kaz