dc literally has better villains than marvel because marvel antagonists are always like “i wear ALL BLACK and THREE PIECE SUITS and i kill people because i’m SAD inside” meanwhile everyone in gotham just be off the shits and have an actual aesthetic and presentation  

The villain’s in Gotham are better because no one can out do Bruce Wayne in  “i wear ALL BLACK and THREE PIECE SUITS and i beat up people because i’m SAD inside” so they had to come up with something else.

this is the only response anyone is allowed to put on this post actually 

please elaborate in tags :)

“you don’t like the proliferation of terms like Unalive outside of TikTok because you realize that you’re aging out of youth culture and it makes you uncomfortable!”

no I don’t like it because there’s something INCREDIBLY dystopian about being forced to soften terms for basic parts of the human experience like death and sex (and even more so terms for oppressed minorities- call me a “le-dollar sign-bian” and I will bite you) purely because advertisers and corporations demand it

I’ve been half-tempted to create BNHA/Pokemon Movies aus for a long while, and I finally got the motivation to draw something up for one of them a little while ago.

This one is for the third Pokemon movie and Aizawa takes the place of Entei and is the most feral Suicune that anyone will ever meet. Eri is his charge and is very protective of her like Entei was. There are a few differences in this au and (spoilers for the movie) that is that Aizawa gets to stay around after the Unown leave because Eri deserves to have a very feral guardian and Pokemon friend.

He also likes to torment Izuku because I mean why not.

You made one of my favorite pokemon into nightmare fuel… and one of my favorite characters

I salute you

Buddy, when racist cunts illegally prevented me from registering to vote by just refusing to accept my papers, I PROMISE YOU shitty guilt trip memes about my inability to vote made everything worse.

You know what ACTUALLY helped?

More than every passive aggressive shit for brains on this website telling me I deserve to me racially harassed for not giving Democrats my soul?

A fucking email from a fucking HERBS AND SPICES STORE that unlike you wretched cunts ACTUALLY HAD VOTER REGISTRATION HELPLINES IN IT.

Every time one of you godforsaken freaks tells me to 'get out and vote' like its cutely trivial and didn't take months of desperate phone calls just to register (IF my registration even WORKED THIS TIME).

If you, like me, are struggling with registration or poll access, try contacting your STATE board of elections.

Request that they send you TWO copies of their registration guidelines. Collect any documents listed in them.

Then, contact your LOCAL board. Tell them you would like to register IN PERSON IF POSSIBLE.

Bring your documents and the two copies of the guideline AND a working cell phone.

If you get ANY trouble AT ALL tell the local person you will call the state board to confirm their registration requirements. Be polite, but do not leave. Put the phone on speaker.

Most of the time, the local person who is doing Actual Serious Federal And State Crimes will give up at that point. If not, the person at the state board will generally outrank and overrule the local one.

Make a note of the names of both the local and state official.

Then, and this is the most important part:

CONFIRM YOUR REGISTRATION WAS FILED.

It may take a day or two for your registration to appear.

Unfortunately, if it's been a week, you're going to have to repeat the process.

Take the names you noted previously, and contact the state board again. Report that these people denied you registration on this day, in spite of you providing these documents, then list all the required papers you collected.

The person at the state SHOULD be able to direct you from there, but the process varies hugely by state.

Good luck to you all.

Clumsy wounds

Not related to any other works I am doing, this was inspired by real life events.

Tagging @ozmav for creating the ship, and @maribat-archive for collecting the stories.

I'm not sure if I should put trigger warning: injury because it's minor, and I don't describe it much, but you never know with people.

Enjoy!

Marinette had been in a relationship with Damian Wayne for 6 months after her class took a trip to Gotham and he had found her forgotten and left behind after the tour at Wayne Enterprise. The two had stayed in contact, and managed to date as Marinette slowly separated from her class due to Lila's lies.

They in fact, had arranged for over summer break for Marinette to spend a couple of weeks with the Wayne household. It had been fine for the first few days, Damian had not left her side much and the rest of the boys adored her.

She was so sweet that if anyone hurt her, they agreed to follow kill instincts and not tell Bruce.

But then again, who would want to hurt Marinette?

Which was why, when Marinette came down the stairs to have breakfast, dressed for the day, with a bleeding lip, the boys all started panicking and going nuts.

"Who did this Angel?" Damian had demanded as he had held her chin to get a better look at it.

"What sort of scum does that? Dick, get the first aid kit." Jason said, looking close to going out with guns blazing.

"I'm looking at all cameras around Gotham and the manor, did you go out for an early run or something?" Tim already had a laptop out while Dick had grabbed a first aid kit, and Alfred.

"Uh, yeah, it is not that big of a deal guys, it will heal." Marinette tried to start eating breakfast, hoping to put an end to the madness that was happening.

"Not a big deal?! Marinette, the guy is going to pay, how did you get out with only one injury?" Dick was looking over her arms and face for traces of other injuries, turning up empty.

Marinette squirmed away, turning red. She was getting flustered and embarassed. She knew she should have stayed in bed. Hiding her face away from them all and curling in on herself, she muttered something.

"What did you say Angel?" Damian asked, the others pausing to know exactly who was in need of a beat down.

"My phone did this." The boys stopped panicking to look confounded. "I wasn't fully awake when I grabbed my phone to turn the alarm off, and so I dropped it. On my face. Where my teeth cut my lip." There was complete silence as Marinette curled in on herself.

Jason burst out laughing while Damian just pulled her into a hug.

"You did say you were a clutz, are you okay?" Marinette nodded hugging back.

"Well, looks like we don't need to kill anyone right now." Tim said to Dick who nodded distractedly.

"Marinette, let me clean it, we don't want it getting infected." Damian scowled over her head at him.

Marinette smiled as Damian's hold tightened. They at least cared for her, even if Jason was laughing and Tim looked amused.

"Todd stop it!"

"She cut her lip with a phone, and you were willing to murder it, I was willing to murder it, what is there not to laugh about demon spawn?"

Back to the regular shenanigans of the Wayne household it seemed.

Just rereading this

apparently people are now purchasing thick water to make slimes with because of a trend on tiktok

thick water is for disabled people who can’t swallow properly. stores usually have extremely limited supplies of it.

please don’t buy thick water for fun or to make slime with. it’s literally the only way some disabled people can drink anything. It’s not a fucking toy

I’m torn about this. Don’t we normally encourage folks to buy accessibility products to teach stores to carry more of it? Like, if it’s the last one on the shelf maybe leave it for the intended buyer but if there’s a shelf-full and you’re buying one? Idk

NO!!!!!!!! PLEASE DO NOT DO THIS

there are EXTREMELY FEW DISABLED PEOPLE WHO NEED THIS PRODUCT. A statistically TINY group of people who have to go store to store to buy it in bulk because they don’t keep more than 4 on the shelf

It’s not like a weighted blanket or compression socks. You won’t increase production by buying them all from the store because this product is literally so little-used that most people in the notes don’t know what it is and have never heard of it

also it’s WATER!!!!! WATER THAT VERY SPECIFIC DISABLED PEOPLE NEED TO DRINK!!! WHO WILL GO WITHOUT DRINKING IF THEY CANT GET IT.

YOU ARE 70% WATER!!!! IMAGINE NOT BEING ABLE TO DRINK ANY AND HOW DISTRESSING AND CRUEL THAT IS

DO. NOT. FUCKING. BUY IT. PLEASE.

ITS NOT WORTH IT. YOU WILL NOT SLEEP WELL AT NIGHT KNOWING YOU TOOK SOMEONE’S ABILITY TO DRINK AWAY IN THE NAME OF MAKING SLIME.

I've noticed as someone with physical disabilities and celiac, that while making mobility aids more accessible is generally a benefit to those who do need it, the opposite appears to happen when it's applied to food. Because of fad gluten free dieters, gluten free food has actually become MORE UNSAFE for people who have actual celiac. The manufacturers are catering to the fad dieters, not the people who actually have to rely on gluten free food for health.

More and more often I'm buying gluten free food that look legit but then I get home and see that I've missed "made on equipment that processes wheat" warnings on it. Or if I'm ordering groceries online, it'll be labeled as gluten free only for the box/jar/whatever to have warnings on it in person. In one obscene case that I talk often about, I nearly bought "celiac certified" ramen that was made from BARLEY! Meanwhile the manufacturers of these dangerous foods marketed as gluten free are still jacking up the price for a criminally low fraction of the amount you'd find in regular food. This was happening before covid and has just gotten worse.

Speaking of, at the beginning of covid I went hungry even when my SNAP was plentiful because people panic bought all the gluten free food. I couldn't find anything in multiple stores. I don't know how high the rate is in my city for celiac, but I'm still suspicious that this was due to the celiac population.

I've been told by epileptics that the same thing is happening because of fad keto dieters. Food that is mislabeled as ketogenic for the fad dieters is dangerous for epileptics to eat because the nutritional ratio is off and it's screwing up their careful and strict diet that's supposed to be so they can control their goddamn SEIZURES.

Tl;dr: don't touch specialized diets if you don't need them. You're not making them more accessible to people who need them, you're making the food manufacters cater to people like YOU instead of the people the diets claim to help and making it even more dangerous for us to eat.

(And if all you care about is money, know that you're wasting it on shitty food in the first place which makes no fucking sense to me)

For the DC x DP server gift exchange!

Constantine has been taking care of dealing with a stray King of the dead for a while now

Please no reposts, referencing, reusing, or edits, please feel free to reblog ❤️ Click for best resolution!

Danny was enjoying himself. His new haunt was suprisingly spacious and came with lots of charges who needed protection and care.

The old butler guy, Alfred, seemed to at least have an idea of what was going on. He had been making extra food lately and leaving it out for Danny to eat in a secluded area. Danny always made sure to turn the plate invisible and sneak it back to his hidden passage panic room before he started eating.

In return, Danny made sure to do lots of chores around the manor. Intangibility and wind manipulation made dusting super easy if you knew how to use it right.

Danny also took his job as a guardian spirit seriously. He overheard the bats fighting about not wanting to be coddled on patrol and decided it was best to let them handle themselves outside of the manor. Danny himself hated when people stuck thier noses into his business.

Jazz had screwed him over countless times with her good intentions.

But the manor was different. This was his new haunt after his old one kicked him out. This family had invited him in whether they knew it or not. Also, since the Fentons and GIW don't exist in this world, they'd have a hell of a time kicking him out.

It's best not to let it come to that. So Danny had to make these people love him the way Amity Park never did.

The Wayne's however are rather dense. You would think them being the worlds greatest detectives would mean something, but they kept silently blaming each other for things happening around the manor until they couldn't.

A book being put away when they were done with it or their messes being cleaned up when they came back into a room could be easily explained by how many people lived there. The family entering the dining room, discussing what they were going to order for dinner since Alfred was gone for a week only to find a full meal waiting for them on the diner table? They couldn't brush that off.

None of them could cook.

oooh Alfie really likes his little helper, and unlike the science first magic second bats, he knows not to offend the new tenant. what if when trying to leave the fentons he lost his voice maybe? he can still make core sounds and wail, he just cant make human words anymore. which is sad cause he can't sass anyone. but he starts taking a page from clockwork and leaves notes for Alfie when he comes back to wash his plates, it starts out small just saying thanks and the food was good. he actualy learns how to cook by watching alfie, which is a big leap from only take out or zombie hotdogs. Maybe he gets up enough courage to request learning how to make or shop for something specific cause it's something he really loved to eat. Alfie would start writing back or talking out loud while he works.

Oh! better idea! anyone remember those alphabet magnets for the fridge? alfie buys a pack to try and get Danny to interact with him more, one day he walks in and sees "Dami like cheese?" with his cookbook open to lazagna or something. no meat just sauce and cheese (personaly i love italian food but hate meat sauce cause of texture issues) cause damian isn't sam, he might allow for some things she didnt and he wanted to be sure?

It would be super cool if different worlds had different unspoken rules for ghosts. like in Danny’s world ghosts could become fully corporeal at will and interact with their environment however they like, but in the DC universe, he can only interact with the objects around him if there’s nobody around/looking at them (much more like our own universe).

He could, in theory, become visible if he wanted to, but it would take a LOT of willpower, and he’s not used to that yet, because in his old world it was super easy to power up/down, and it’s a lot harder here (it’s the equivalent of trying to lift a super heavy weight without training). So the longer he remains in this universe, the stronger he gets simply by virtue of constantly exercising his power.

So, Alfred DOES start leaving food out for him, but he’s basically a house spirit atm, so he can’t eat it the way he normally does. He might be able to take bits and pieces, but it’s much more the thought and emotion behind the gesture that strengthens him (the same way that deities and spirits interact with offerings).

Danny can’t really do much at first in regards to cleaning up, it’s more like if Tim fell asleep in the library, the draft shifted the curtain to keep the sun out of his eyes, or if Dick has a nightmare, Danny can knock Zitka the stuffed elephant off of its shelf to wake up Dick from the nightmare, which then leads Dick to cuddle with Zitka for the rest of the night, preventing more nightmares.

But the longer Danny stays there, and the more he can help out, the more he can do. He gets stronger, either by acclimating to the world, or because of Alfred’s continuing belief and offerings. Now Danny can find a bookmark for Jason’s book AND sustain enough strength to put it away. He can straighten out wrinkles in the rug to prevent tripping, AND dust out the cobwebs in the vaulted ceilings and chandelier, AND close any cupboards the batboys forgot about, all in one day!

And, finally, after almost a year of living in Wayne Manor, he has enough strength to draw a small heart in sauce on one of the plates Alfred leaves for him.

Which prompts the alphabet magnets.

…

The batfam is baffled. Why does Alfred need alphabet magnets? If he needs to leave notes for the family, there are easier ways to do it. They rarely go in the kitchen, because that’s Alfred’s domain. But because it’s Alfreds domain, they also can’t prevent him from getting the magnets or using them however he’d like.

Danny is DELIGHTED. He can make words to talk with Alfred, and the magnets are big enough for his current level of ghostly fine (Not Actually Very Fine) motor skills!! Now he can practice EVEN MORE, but he can also talk to someone!

His very first message stops Alfred in his tracks.

I aM DAnNy

Alfred is absolutely delighted.

Later, when moving the alphabet magnets becomes super easy, Alfred gets those poetry magnets, and eventually he starts leaving note pads and pens around the manor. After the batfam discovers and subsequently adopts Danny [much to the chagrin of Bruce, who doesn’t trust this so-called ‘ghost’], they install a dry-erase message board in the kitchen for Danny, as well as one in the Cave. Danny has made it clear that he will not be interfering with their nightly activities, but he gladly uses the cave whiteboard to notify them of hot chocolate waiting in the kitchen, or to give them reminders before bed.

The installation of the kitchen message board has begun prompting the family to gather in the kitchen for snacks so they can socialize with Danny, instead of taking their bounty somewhere else in the manor and eating alone. And after both Alfred and Danny make it clear that violence and threats will not be tolerated at the table, snack and meal times become a wonderful neutral meeting ground for everybody, where they can talk about their day without worrying if someone is going to throw a knife at them.

Alfred: *adopts Danny*

Bruce: "I don't trust him."

Batkids: "Oh did your adopted father give you a new younger brother of dubious origin without telling you? How terrible that must be for you."

ooh the different rules thing is interesting~ Especially since this is how it seems to work for Deadman. I can also see this leading to bad days for Danny though? like he's in this new world and at first he cant be seen at all let alone interact with anything, can he even access his transformation at all? Sure at first its kind of a relief depending on what happened to make him leave, but we know Danny is a very tactile and social person, he dosent have his friends. he cant touch anyone, he cant even eat properly. Also his sass, if he does get his voice back could anyone even hear him?

I would hope that after Alfie notices him and gets the magnets he keeps getting stronger through interaction with the batfam to the point he can somewhat be himself again. his big league powers are still there but inaccessable at his current strength level. he may not want to follow them outside at night but its not unheard of for there to be break ins at the manor, especially if Alfie is home alone.

But if something happens to get Alfred involved? like bruce has auto drive installed in everything, multiple back up from various family and just a whisper can get clarks attention. Alfred though was his original one man backup plan, he would pick bruce up when he couldn't drive, he would put on the cowl if bruce needed to visibly be elseware, he is not afraid to wave around his marksman skills.

If Alfred gets dragged into the field, shits serious, danny's going with you cant tell him no its his job as a protection spirit and since his last family rejected him he dosent know if he can re-anchor again. (perhaps that also had a hand in his weakened state?) At least he dosent feel the Omen of Death Cries in his throat, just danger. And danger he can help with.

And if this act of protection makes him strong enough to finally be at least somewhat visible well he's allowed to cry happy tears right?

Trust Alfred, English born and raised on old Isles folk tales, would Browniefy Danny once he realized what's going on.

Yep

Since Percy can talk to sea creatures, I'd like to think that one day he passed a pet shop with all these fish screaming at him in agony. Since then there has been a giant aquarium in cabin 3 with fish. He converses with them daily when he's at camp. He gave them all names (they were delighted to hear his suggestions).

There is one grumpy grouch that always tries to eat as much food before all the other fish. He has to keep him forcibly apart in a tiny water ball during dinner. He named him Zeus. Percy doesn't give a shit. Poseidon knows and thinks it is hilarious.

Chiron, who takes care of them when Percy's gone, cannot understand them but he doesn't like the way they look so judgemental. They are very much gossiping about him to his face.

Oh my gods this is precious. And hilarious. Yeah, fuck Zeus!

it's that time of year again

there's no ' none ' option because if you don't like any of these songs this poll isn't for you. sorry

Merry Chirstmas from the whole Famn Damily

The Watchtower has a perfectly normal and totally ordinary Mechanic. Except that it doesn't, Danny just hasn't found the right time to tell them that yet.

Danny, as Phantom, decided to live in the Watchtower without asking. It was in space, it was away from the GIW and his parents, and it was cool. Really it was the best Real Estate he could want. It would be difficult, but Danny was full confident he could do it.

Except it was easy?

Like, really easy.

Day one, he had dropped his Phantom Form and was in the cafeteria when it was empty, and the Head of Engineering tugged him aside and scolded him for like twenty minutes on leaving without the proper uniform or badge.

So he got a uniform and badge.

Day two he met the Big Three as they walked down the hallway, and Batman handed him a busted up helmet with the instruction "Fix this". So he did.

And on it went, on and on, until Danny was paying rent by being a Mechanic on the Watchtower.

This really doesn't change anything for anyone, until the Watchtower is hacked by an enemy and all listed personnel are gathered up.

Al listed personnel.

Danny isn't actually listed.

Right as the villain is video conferencing his monologue to the heroes trying to get in, Danny walks into the room, gently nudges the man aside, and starts pulling out wires from the console.

"What are you doing?"

"Shhh, I don't get paid enough to deal with these stupid glitches. The airlocks are down again, fuck me, right?"

"What-I shut those down! Cease this!"

"Sorry, what? Ope, doesn't matter anymore. Already fixed it. Shields are operating normally, zetas are online, and air locks are active-sorry 'bout that."

With the villain still spluttering and in shock, Danny nudges past him and his lackeys again and out of the room.

Okay so Danny gets adopted by Bruce. Yeah? Yeah.

And they don't know about his powers? Obviously. We know this part of the story.

BUT. On a casual trip out for food or whatever, Danny and some of the bat sibs get cornerd by reporters and paparazzi. There panicking bec danny JUST got here and they haven't had time to breif him on how to interact with the media and he's totally gonna flounder and they need to help him before he totally flubs it!

Exept, he doesn't. He smiles, nice and bright, into the camra. He waits patiently for each reporter to ask their questions and then answers confidently, giving them something walst acctually answering nothing. "Where are you from?" "A small town, I'm sure you wouldn't know it but, really, it's about where I am now."How did you come to be adopted by bruce?"Well, I look quite a bit like my new brothers, don't you think? Haha. I like to think it was meant to be."

And on and on he gose, dancing around them, shareing professionally worded jokes and calmly addressing eatch person as they viyed for his attention, controlling the flow of conversation.

The bat kids all look at eatchother.

This kids been media trained.

*Not all Greek Gods listed because we ran out of space.

I chose Persephone because it asked which would have a SECRET tumblr

There's an up-and-coming Tech Giant, called Fenton Works, and Batman is determined to prove that the company is a front for a villain.

Danny, after his parents turned from Ghost hunting to being the first official Ghost Anthropologists, decided to repurpose some of their weapons.

And, well, there was a contest being run by Wayne Enterprises; whoever can design a robot that will help the environment got prize money and a grant.

Danny, in all his mechanical engineering prowess, was bored. So he designed a thing. Repurposed the Fenton Guns into a cute robotic tortoise that would clean the beach.

It spiraled from there, and now Fenton Works is the leading name in green technology that's cleaning up the Earth bit by bit. Sea Dragon robots that clean oil and trash from the ocean; beach tortoises that clean the sand and beach and deposit their hoard of trash into designated receptacles that Danny uses as material to make more robots; Cryptid "stalker" robots with long legs that delicately patrol forests to perform "fuel management" and clear out the underbrush to help manage wildfires; moving gargoyle robots that sit on top of skyscrapers to help clean the air with huge sail-like wings, etc.

Basically, Danny pulls a Doctor Elisabet Sobeck, but with less world ending and more actually helping. (Not that the world ending was Elisabet's fault, of course, but different franchise)

And due to the number of times aliens try to attack and rogues send their own robots to attack people, naturally Danny installed self-defense protocols, along with one single golden rule written into the very OS of every single robot; Save Humans Whatever the Cost.

Problem is, Batman has never seen robots like this not be used for evil purposes, and he knows that their power source (a closely guarded Fenton Works secret) is some sort of liquid that glows green.

He really only knows of one liquid that glows green.

So he's determined to find everything he can about Fenton Works, because there's no way that Daniel Fenton isn't actually a villain in the making.

Danny's just thrilled for the chance to work with Wayne Enterprises.

Oh this? This is BEAUTIFUL. Especially since there is no way in hell Aquaman is gonna let him touch a hair on this boy's head. You think Atlantis DIDNT threaten to sink every last one of those Sea Dragons? They aren't fools. Those were Threat Shaped.

Fenton had to come in front of a TEAM of Atlantis finest, who of course, agreed to sign NDAs, to explain WHO they worked IN DETAIL to their satisfaction. The boy was glad too. Those Dragons have fuckin Atlantian GAURDS now to prevent external tampering.

He even made Atlantian "Air" purifiers in the shape of jellyfish to clean up the waters near Atlantis. Insure the young, elderly, and infirmed had clean water to breathe. After all the shit humans have pulled towards Atlantis? Absolutely NOT. Danny Fenton both CLEARLY a few fish short of a school AND a the most precious baby boy in all of Atlantis. Let him make his helper animals.

They're pretty sure he has some sort of compulsive NEED to help.

And also? Save Humans Whatever The Cost? Imagine that. No REALLY imagine it. Being out at sea or camping way out in the middle of NO WHERE when some invasion hits. The sky splitting open.

Death starting to rain from above.

You have no where to hide.

Can only look up in horror. Scream and hold your kids, who you just wanted to make memories with, as you watch DEATH get closer and closer. You're crying. Alone. Will anyone even find your family's bodies?

Then SUDDENLY?

The sea or tea line SPLITS. Like a titan rising from the deep. You've seen them, meandering on the horizon. On the news. Those Fenton Work Green Works projects. Pretty and harmless, just poking along as they slowly save the world. Made to look non-threatening.

It doesn't look non-threatening now. It glows a poisonous green. Some giant SEA DRAGON or SPIDER like THING. Firing a concentrated beam of SOMETHING that cuts straight though the aliens about to tear your family apart. Flinging them back and away. And suddenly?

You are in the shadow of that colossal beast. As it fires, again and again. As the world BOOMS and shakes, full of fury and smoke. You feel so small. But... but the Green Works beast is... protecting you? Every attack that should have hit your family, it takes.

It's once pristine body, slowly gathering cracks, then holes, then missing chunks.

Somewhere in the world, superheroes force the enemy leaders back. The sky starts to clear. The Green Works beast backs away, teetering, barely holding. An automated message plays, "We are sorry for the scare. We here at Fenton Works prioritize lives over property. If anyone is injured, please, seek medical aid immediately. There is an emergency beacon and kit in this robot. Deploying."

A box pops out to either land with a thump or splash, sitting or float just in from of you, as the Green Works beast just... falls.

And it's like watching some giant and brave animal DIE in front of you. Maybe it's because of how it's shaped. Maybe the fact that it save you. But you can barely see past the tears as you struggle to open the emergency kit. Turn on that beacon, so help can find you.

And the only reason you're ALIVE is because of some cleaning robot you never gave thought too. And now it feels like it's dead because of you.

I imagine such stories make the news. The grieving faces of kids who's school bus was protected by a gargoyle. Of fishermen protected by Sea Dragons. Hikers who are only alive because of those walkers.

I imagine NONE of that reassures Batman. It is, in fact, the most terrifying sort of charm campaign he could imagine. Humanity LOVES these robots. Believes them benevolent. Bruce? He needs to be SURE.

God when that happens you'd better bet that humans are going pack bond the hell outta those beasts. Heartfelt stories shared across the world. People getting tattoos of their fave Green Works beast. People visiting the beach petting the robot turtles. Sailors tales of the sea guardians that protect them. People putting silly little hats and gloves for the gargoyles so that they won't "get cold" at night. These robots are very friend shaped, Batman! We love them!

Oh that EXACTLY what's gonna happen. And it's not like Fenton works doesn't have beacon trackers in their tech? That's really expensive tech! That Weirdos keep trying to steal or mess with! Of COURSE he has trackers in them. A way to tell when one is rendered off line.

Invasions are a nightmare to clean up from. You send out rescues teams, have to find your robots, most of which are TRASHED because, well... people were in danger. Even the mouse-bots are down. They are literally just build for infrastructure inspection and minor maintenance. But a Universal Command is a Universal Command.

Imagine that CHAOS. People crying and holding bits and boxes of "their hero!" Outside of Fenton works offices. Crowds simmering on the edge of RIOTS because everyone is upset and desperate to see the robot that saved their LIFE fixed up.

Some of them drove hundreds of miles. There are urban robots, forestry robots, beach turtles, literally every gargoyle that was IN the city. Because Every. Single. Robot. Turned on the Invading forces.

They just... stopped. Turned around. And opened fire. A city wide "Not Today, fucker." But it COST them. Being the first response? Made them the first TARGETS too. Before the Heros, before law enforcement, first responders, anyone. The invaders clearly assumed they were a planetary defense system. Acted accordingly.

So now about over 9 out of every 10 Fenton works Robots are down.

Their technicians are scrambling at full speed to repair and release. It... would be a PERFECT time, for Brucie Wayne to offer his help. Arthur is glaring DEATH into the side of his skull. His eye promising terrible, terrible retribution if Bruce messes with Fenton works while they are down, but...

He has to know.

Has to be CERTAIN.

Besides, if they ARE benevolent? Wayne Tech HAS the work force and history of charity outreach. They can help. Would you prefer LUTHOR?

(That's not the only Tech name in the game and you KNOW it, Batman.)

So, because the robots are powered by ectoplasm, there were a lot of concerns about the health risks. What would happen if the battery leaked? Danny knows from personal experience that exposure to ectoplasm is very bad. You could become a ghost, or it could just kill you. It's a super dangerous and toxic substance to work with at high concentrations.

Keyword, high concentrations.

Ambient unsignatured ectoplasm, the kind safest and most ethical for batteries, isn't even tangible if the concentration is low enough. You have to condense it to force it to occupy tangible and intangible space.

It is very possible to design the batteries so that any ectoplasm that leaks out will disperse enough to stop interacting with real world matter. A sea turtle robot leaking from its battery is a minimal risk to the fish that come across it. (Through they do let those robots stay in the field for long)

That doesn't mean the ectoplasm leaking out isn't a concern. Frankly, Danny would like to limit the amount of otherworldly matter on Earth. It would be nice be able to clean the environment of wayward ectoplasm too.

Sending more ecto-powered robots to collect the ectoplasm would be inefficient and even counter-productive, but there is a solution.

While the ectoplasm doesn't interact with real world matter, it's still subject to the space time curvature of Earth's gravity. Ectoplasmic particles will fall towards the center, pass it, slow down, and fall towards the center again. As they do, they may collide with other ectoplasmic particles and lose momentum until eventually they start accumulating in Earth's core.

All this ectoplasm in Earth's core is intangible, and the core is too dense for any of it to become tangible, so the ectoplasm ball just grows.

It's not a huge problem yet, but Danny is working on finding a way to build a portal in the Ghost Zone to the Earth core's so they can remove all the ectoplasm that's accumulated WITHOUT the core itself or anything tangible getting into the Ghost Zone. He'd rather recycle the ectoplasm without getting a face full of magma, thank you very much.

The plans for this portal were one of the few things that Oracle was able to access and save during an attempt to hack into Fenton Works.

And yeah, plans to create an interdimensional hole in the center of the planet sounds really bad out of context.

Batman feels vindicated. Until he corners Fenton. Because he makes Batman sign a NDA and then shows the problem and his working solutiona

Danny Fenton bleeds green. Lazarus green. And then Danny distills a single drop of his green blood into each robot's green fuel. Danny said it was important, because that's what programs the robots to always protect humans, because *Danny* would always protect humans (except the Joker, Danny adds with a grimace, fuck him).

Batman understands now that this is magitech. He calls in Constantine to ask his opinion.

"Oh yeah, these new machines are definitely neck deep in supernatural energy, but every last damn one of em that I've managed to examine are filled with the essence of a powerful protector. Don't know how Fenton managed it, but its a brilliant way to safeguard them from going rogue. And the poor things'll destroy themselves before ever allowing anyone to reprogram them. Believe me, I've tried every way I can imagine to try to exploit them, magical *and* mundane. Whoever the essence is from, they're damn fucking powerful."

Batman... isnt *satisfied* with that answer, but he does find it harder to be paranoid about the situation.

"I know that look. Dont you dare ask me to do what I think you are," Constantine accuses after a beat, "Look, I already woke up once this week being stared down by a dozen creepy stalker deer after running my experiments on one of them rats. I don't wanna offend some spirit goin' out of their way ta help people any more than I already have."

"They threatened you?"

"...No," Constantine hesitantly answered, "I think they were waiting to see if I succeeded. Frankly, I let the little bugger go after that. I heard what happened to the Joker after he tried to tamper with them. I wasn't askin' for a repeat."

"Hn. You dont need to summon them. I know who it is," Batman answers before lurking off.

It was Danny Fenton's blood after all. Batman had a lot more questions for him.

(Sorry if connie is ooc, i suck at british slang)

Can you imagine though, if Batman got back to interrogate Danny and FentonWorks was attacked while he was gone? By the G.I.W.? Like, the ghost hunters broke in while everyone's guards were down and kidnapped Danny for experimentation and vivisection, and the robots didn't automatically go to help him because his own protective instinct doesn't extend to himself.

Batman probably wouldn't feel awful right away, no, it takes until he and his team are partway through the compound, and they find Danny. The "scientists" there were partway through some horrible experiment, and it finally clicks for him. This kid is the same age as Tim. He looks and acts like he'd be one of his kids.

It's, relatively, an understatement to say that he doesn't do too well after having this realization.

But the public outrage after the news breaks about the head engineer of GreenWorks being arrested and tortured because of a law that blatantly violated the meta-human protection act.

Batman was convinced from the beginning that Fenton was some dastardly villain playing the long-con, but despite his best efforts, the only monsters he'd found so far were all wearing white suits.

Then, in the middle of taking down the anti-ecto acts, Batman realized that Fenton *was* working out a long term plan.

And nothing about it was malevolent.

In his investigation into the GIW, he found that they had been keeping Fenton's home town in a media black out for several years. Danny lived his entire high school career under threat of an agency that had declared him legally non-sentient.

(Danny was probably the vigilante Phantom that risked life and limb to protect his hometown, fending off League-level threats, the GIW, a terrible reputation, and for the first couple of years, even his own parents.)

Getting out into the wider world and exploiting the Wayne Industries competition to fast-track ecto-fuel robots that genuinely help both people and the environment? Putting those robots where everyone could see them? Making some of them absolutely adorable and others kind of creepy cute?

It was all to see how people reacted. It was to find out if people would recognize that some of them became sentient. And the people passed that test with flying colors.

And if a robot being fueled by ectoplasm could be so clearly sentient, what justification did the GIW have to declare ecto-entities - and Danny Fenton - completely non sentient?

It was laughable.

It was *genius.*

And on top of that, there was too much attention on Fenton for him to disappear without raising questions. If Batman hadn't been going back specifically to talk to Fenton at that moment, it likely would have taken less than a day for his absence to be noticed and commented on.

Danny Fenton was trapped in an impossible situation, and instead of breaking under the pressure like so many others would have, he put his brains and his hands to work to prove to the world that the GIW was wrong.

He even proved Batman wrong.

Bruce Wayne doesn't hesitate to endorse Danny Fenton after that.

I absolutely adore this. Bruce is admiring Danny for his genius.

But ya’ll. This is Danny. Wonderfully, brilliant, stupid Danny. I personally believe that this 100% started because he was bored, had the parts, and there was a contest. And then it just took off.

It wasn’t until later, much later, after people started treating the bots as living beings that someone (probably Sam or Jazz. Probably Jazz. Sam’s too excited about the environmental work being done) realized this could help them with the GIW. Danny was too deep in a scientific dive to think on those things.

That was EXACTLY how i intended it, yes. :)

Our precious boy danny is such a wonderful genius moron. He's better at thinking on the fly than planning ahead. Bruce definitely overthought it, but Danny isnt gonna complain cause he finally got that endorsement.

as a general rule. if what we’re calling ‘cultural appropriation’ sounds like nazi ideology (i.e. ‘white people should only do white people things and black people should only do black people things’) with progressive language, we are performing a very very poor application of what ‘cultural appropriation’ means. this is troublingly popular in the blogosphere right now and i think we all need to be more critical of what it is we may be saying or implying, even unintentionally.

There is nothing wrong with everyone enjoying each other’s cultures so long as those cultures have been shared. 

Eating Chinese food, watching Bollywood movies, going to see Cambodian dancers, or learning to speak Korean so you can watch every K drama in existence is totally fine. The invitation to participate in those things came from within those cultures. The Mexican family that owns the place where I get fajitas wants me to eat fajitas. Their whole business model kind of depends on it, actually. 

If you see something from another culture you think you might want to participate in, but you don’t know if that would be disrespectful or appropriative, you can just…ask. Like. A Jewish friend explained what a mezuzah was to me, recently. (It’s the little scroll-thing near their front doors that they touch when they come into their house. It basically means “this is a Jewish household.”)

“Oh, cool,” I said. “Can I touch it? Or is it only for Jewish people?”

“You can touch it or you can not touch it,” she said. “I don’t care.”

“Cool, I’m gonna touch it, then.”

“Cool.”

It’s not hard.

You want to twerk, twerk. I’ve never heard a black person say they didn’t think anybody else should be allowed to twerk. Just that they want us to acknowledge that they invented that shit, not Miley fucking Cyrus.

It really boils down to three simple things:

This is really useful to me personally because I’ve definitely caught myself losing sight of what cultural appropriation actually is, and why it matters, so thank you, and everybody else pay attention too

You’re welcome

This is the most useful thing I’ve ever reblogged.

i used to think when people said my cousin twice removed that their cousin must’ve did some fucked up shit to get kicked out of the family twice

When I found this the first thing I thought was “now I can find out how Count Olaf is related to the Baudelaire children.”