the forest

embraces (melt into me)

I Didn’t Lie to you

Djungelskog

another life

me, dming a cute girl: omg you're so funny and smart but like...i remember you tweeting something a while back about like, having raptorial forelimbs or some shit? you're not like, a bug, are you? like obv it's totally fine if you are but i just need to know

the horse-sized praying mantis on the other side of the screen: hahaha no omg...how the fuck would a bug even use a computer lmao

The devil works hard but xkcd works harder

I remember loving Hagrid when I was a child but as an adult going into ecology I realize that if he were real he would be my professional nemesis

the equivalent of a guy with no professional qualifications and a history of illegally purchasing endangered tiger and polar bear cubs to raise in his one bedroom apartment, purposefully introducing dangerous invasive species into the refuge of a marginalized people, and the backyard breeding of hyena hybrids being hired as your high school biology teacher

sounds like Florida public schools tbh

god if I were a character in the Harry Potter universe JK would have written me as a sneering little bureaucract who hates fun and freedom and buys black market polyjuice potion to trans my gender (but in a way explicitly described as sad, pathetic, and a little perverse) and is also an asshole for thinking her dumb jock protagonist is kind of a jerk

Not to mention introducing an entire spider species to nearby forest that proceeds to take over the entire countryside and invades the school.

Ontop of that you've got a bum of a headmaster who just allows all this going on, allowing for reptiles to be attacked by his pupils, and habituated a wild bird.

@pikkugen you cannot hide this in the tags

This alone could be a fantasy thesis title I would absolutely be willing to write as a biologist in the HP verse

I would be the pain in the ass muggle kid pestering everyone to stop keeping nocturnal, high-strung owl species in bird cages and using them as carrier pigeons! The rats are cool though I would fill my wizard robes with pet rats for sure

this reminds me of the time me and my platonic soulmate jason spent a glorious three hours and 45 minutes tearing the worldbuilding of harry potter to shreds over facetime

we covered a lot but i’ll summarize:

- where the FUCK do they get all the gold to make galleons?!  gold is a rare commodity and extremely valuable to muggles, so even if it’s just gold leaf that’s still a shit ton of gold needed to mint new coins!  there’s no way in hell muggles wouldn’t notice all that missing gold!  it’s not sustainable, i mean, there’s a reason the us stopped using silver to make their coins way back when!

- how does the ministry pay its employees and get funding?! not once in the vast amounts of hp lore i’ve consumed in my 16 yrs of life has there ever been even a whisper about wizard taxes!  not once do we hear the weasley’s or anyone else complain or joke about hating taxes, something even my 8 yr old campers do!

- if the weasleys are so poor, why doesn’t mrs. weasley have a job?

- if professor bins (the ghost professor) is dead, how would hogwarts pay him? if he’s legally dead, his bank account would no longer be active and there wouldn’t be anywhere for his salary to go!

- if hogwarts is the only wizarding school in great britain, as well as being a public school, why are there so few students? i checked and according to jk rowling the entire student body of hogwarts only amounts to 1,000 students, about 143 per grade!

there’s a lot more i could talk about, but these are what really stood out to me.  as a writer, a former potterhead, and a trans youth, i feel that it is my solemn duty to absolutely eviscerate jk rowling and harry potter.  thank you, and goodnight.

the two most valid ursula k le guin quotes are the one that compares capitalism to the divine right of kings and the one about kirk being in love with spock

So long as we get to include "the constrained body knows and values the freedom of the mind" because that kind of marries both of yours

um... you are so right. 

I’LL TAKE A HAMMER AND FIX THE BABY

These tags holy shit I was laughing just watching the video but they made me cry laugh thinking about what an experience that would be

is anyone else just like. constantly filled with rage about their position under late capitalism and how we are expected to just keep playing this game that we know will literally kill us, is already killing people all over the world, and yet everyone around us is somehow fine with going about business as usual, with pretending we are free by being able to choose between different ways of being exploited. there is nothing more dehumanising than being forced to partake in a system that is actively detrimental to our survival as human beings, that is so physically, psychologically and spiritually destructive, and i don’t know how to deal with this anger anymore

there’s just some fics... they never leave u bro. i’ll be sitting on the toilet four years later thinking about the 94k enemies to lovers fic that captured my soul

Me writing at age 15: what IF the story was about people KIDNAPPING teenagers and CRUELLY EXPERIMENTING on them and I had a NINE YEAR OLD accidentally KILL A MAN with unharnessed DEADLY PSYCHIC ENERGY

Me writing at age 25: what if a vampire was just a really good dad to his loving family and my characters had a whole conversation with a faerie about human music genres

angery!

150 million years worth of reptilian fury contained in a body smaller than a shoebox

angery!

150 million years worth of reptilian fury contained in a body smaller than a shoebox

the line between attraction and gender envy is very thin