i’m your mom

I think kafka’s diaries are the strongest evidence that journaling is not necessarily good for your mental health

it's because he didn't use washi tape

Call me a bucket full of pennies the way having sex with me is difficult and painful for others

call me aloe vera the way having sex with me is easy and healing

my name is jamie

hi jamie!!! ^_^

Hi jamie

I dreamt there was an episode of Columbo where he’s a rat. The trouble was that he kept getting distracted from the case by food he found in the gutter.

I fear a feral hog death more than a mountain lion death because I feel like it would be slower and like the hog noises would piss me off the whole time and I wouldn't even be excited to sneak a couple of quick pets in while I was being mauled.

The best you are gonna get is some mid teir puns from the situation and likely no one is there to appreciate it and the hog certainly isn't going to.

"Really going hog wild"

"Trying to hog me to yourself"

Etc.

You get me.

a 12 pack of dr pepper is like a monkeys paw but instead of 3 wishes you get 12 and you can only wish for a can of dr pepper

I agree

one of my favourite little asides in the john chapters is augustine bringing alfred along and him doing absolutely nothing to contribute. like hes just there. most man ever in my opinion

#he says money is a shared hallucination and then dies in a cult schism#guy of all time

I would like to note that Alfred and Cristabel were the ones who gathered and processed all the financial data and manifests that let them figure out that the trillionaires were abandoning Earth.

#on a totally different note imagine being a hedge fund manager during the fucking climate apocalypse and realizing that everything you do #is stupid bullshit that is going obsolete because the world is dying #and then your brother calls and asks if you want to join his best friend's cult

thinking about this, especially in the context of the economy crashing early in the flashback storyline when some information leaked about the extent of the cryo project. We don't get the details but I think any sniff of "literal billions are being invested into a project to freeze the entire global population and ship us all off planet because earth is fucked, yes this is real, yes this project has been peer reviewed, yes multiple governments are at least aware of it, we are SO fucked" would be enough to crash the stock market very, very badly, leading to trillions wiped out and bank runs and wild stockpiling, minimum. Imagine being a finance guy in the middle of all THAT, and then you find out your big bro is directly involved

just curious if you guys will reblog with your pettiest dating red flag in the tags… mine is people who put ketchup on hot dogs. absolutely NOT 🤚🚫

this is everything i was hoping for and more

In Japanese, they don’t say “moon,” they say “tsuki,” which literally translates to “moon,” and I think that’s how language works.

Hey its been at least 9 years anything changed?

nope! all quiet on the linguistic front. i am a girl now though

🙁?

Cake lyrics

He wants to show you the fish he caught 🥹

HAAANK! THAT'S NOT ART BY THE OP HANK! OP REPOSTED IT WITHOUT CREDIT! HANK!

IT'S AI-GENERATED ART HANK! HAANK! THE FLOWER LINEWORK IS NONSENSICAL AND THE ROOM CORNERS DON'T MEET. IT'S AI! HANK!

Messenger! What news have you from the Yaoi front?

i can't feel my legs

A shame. Rest in the dining hall. The Yuri nuns will attend to your wounds.

Egads. Perhaps you may wait here. The nuns appear occupied.

Having anotheg 'gork we have got to get out of bed faster then this' morning

dasfsffadfjdag I meant girl but gork works better

I didn't even question it I was nodding along like I'm literally right there with you gork