Alright everyone : ) It’s been three years. I completed every level of therapy and also became a marine biologist. Now I have time to relax.

What did I miss?

grief is so crazy like what if i forget what her laugh sounds like. does she know i loved her. i miss her so much. i catch myself doing things she used to do. i wish i could call her. i miss her so much. i do a crossword puzzle. i cry while washing the dishes. does she know i loved her? my heart feels like a hummingbird. i miss her so much. what if i forget what her laugh sounds like. what if i forget.

Nathaniel Orion G. K. / March 2023

God they're playing Christmas music at my job now I hate this I hate this I hate this, why is there a two month period at the end of the year where we're all chill about listening to bad harmonies from the 1970s on repeat from every loudspeaker in existence. This is cruel and unusual psychological warfare. And why's it always loudest in the FUCKING employee washroom. Where do I get to hide and cry

today a breathy jazzy Christmas song was playing in the washrooms and when the singer went "What could be better than Christmas?" A woman in one of the toilets yelled back, "Oh, shove it up your ass!" and she's my hero now

it’s that time of year again

there’s no ’ none ’ option because if you don’t like any of these songs this poll isn’t for you. sorry

You know what. Fuck you.

*unhallows your ween*

IT

FUCKEN

WIMDY

hi american followers how was the loud sound was it fun . did u have fun with the loud sound :]

bharatnatyam air bender

“but what about separating the art from the artist” buddy. listen to me. joanne kathleen rowling is relevant for one reason and one reason only—she wrote harry potter. that’s why she’s famous. that is the bedrock of her fucking platform. jk rowling is the harry potter lady and harry potter is the jk rowling guy. this is not the same thing as listening to a song on repeat even though the keyboardist was an asshole, or reading a novel by some dude who sucked ideological shit in the 1800s. jk rowling has a hate platform right now, today, and she sustains it off of harry potter bucks. u will forgive me if i am unwilling to advertise for her

People make fun of Newbury Honor books and how they’re all about making kids sad but honestly my memory of Newbury Honor books is like. Ella Enchanted aka a fucking incredible cultural treasure of a work of children’s literature about the value of disobedience. A Single Shard which I don’t know how it would hold up my current standards for literature cuz I haven’t read it since elementary school but definitely was about hope and not in a fake-ass “your dog died but it’s important to be hopeful anyway” way. And at least one Joan Bauer book, all of which that I recall were fun and thought-provoking to my growing brain, even if looking back I think I have some disagreements with the author. I’ve no doubt the medal got slapped on a lot of dumb transparent tearjerkers, but my experience was pretty positive I gotta say!

SORRY. ACCIDENTALLY REBLOGGED INSTEAD OF SAVING A DRAFT. CAN’T FIX YET BECAUSE HUSBAND IS READING REAPER MAN, AND THAT IS MUCH MORE IMPORTANT. IGNORE FOR THE NEXT HOUR, PLEASE.

This made me curious, so I went through my bookshelf and found the books I own that clearly state they’re Newbery Medal or Newbery Honor winners. I have:

Holes, by Louis Sachar - an extremely funny, weird, and heartbreaking exploration or intergenerational trauma and the incarceration state, and about as far from a tear jerker as you can get. (Like even the ‘I can fix it’ and ‘she was going to die’ lines provoke a much more passionate response than is usually associated with ‘tear jerker’.)

My Side of the Mountain, by Jean Craighead George - wilderness survivalist wish fulfillment. Kid goes into the wild and is so very smart and skillful, and tames predators to hunt with him, and his family regrets not being nice enough to him. It’s a really good version of that fantasy. No tears. (Maybe a trusty animal companion dies, but that’s not the focus.)

Number the Stars, by Lois Lowry - definitely a tear jerker! Jewish girl trying to pretend she isn’t in Nazi occupied Denmark. Probably one of the books people who want to get a Newbery try to emulate. It’s great.

Mrs. Frisby and the Rats of NIMH, by Robert C. O’Brien - animal adventure thriller. A mother mouse works with science experiment rats to save the life of her dying son. I found it scary and fascinating as a kid. The deaths are all heroic or horrific.

The Egypt Game, by Zilpha Keatley Snyder - kids’ imagination gets out of hand, and they start really getting scared. I remember this book making a big impression on me when I was about 10, also struggling with the boundaries between reality and imagination. Forget how it ends, so I have no clue if it goes for cheap emotional punches.

The Voyages of Doctor Dolittle, by Hugh Lofting - ridiculous and cute adventures of a doctor who talks to animals. The authour had to actively forget everything he knew to be able to write this nonsense, but it’s pretty fun. The depiction of Africa is … hard, though. Complete fluff.

Little House on the Pairie Series, by Laura Ingalls Wilder - books 4-9 were all given Newbery Honors. Y’all know Little House. Most of the tear jerker moments happen before book 4, if I remember correctly, but I could see someone making an argument.

Charlotte’s Web, by E. B. White - yeah yeah, definitely some emotions being played with here.

The House of Sixty Fathers, by Meindert DeJong - little Chinese boy deals with starvation and horrors before the nice American soldiers allow him to stay at their army base. This is … kind of what people are complaining about, actually. Exotic sad children, white heroes, and a bittersweet ending.

Ramona Quimby, Age 8, by Beverly Cleary - slice of life of a ‘hyperactive’ kid, back when that meant an extremely well behaved kid who sometimes had to be asked twice to sit still. Confusing for someone with ADHD, but pretty good. No sad at all.

Bridge to Terabithia, by Katherine Paterson - one of my favourite books, but definitely a tear jerker. Also features a manic pixie dream girl. But the most accurate depiction of children’s imagination I’ve ever read.

The Whipping Boy, by Sid Fleischman - kind of average Prince and the Pauper-esque story, if I remember right? Didn’t make much of an impression.

The Giver, by Lois Lowry - one of the better kids social commentary sci-fi novels I’ve ever read. Kid gets chosen by his ‘utopian’ community to bear the burden of knowing the things they gave up to create their perfect world. The people who complain about Newberys probably hate this book but they’re wrong.

The Twenty-One Balloons, The Tale of Despereaux, and Jacob Have I Loved - haven’t actually read these. I think I started Jacob Have I Loved, but I don’t know how far I got. But one is early science fiction about getting trapped an island of mad scientists. The second is Tumblr beloved, about a heroic mouse. And the third is about sibling jealousy.

I don’t own Sarah, Plain and Tall, by Patricia MacLachlan yet, but I immediately thought of it when you mentioned Newbery winners. It’s about kids whose father gets a mail-order bride. And about how complicated it is to start loving someone. Wonderful! Just great.

-

So this list has a pretty low sad-kid ratio. And a lot of great books. But that COULD just be because I hate good taste!

I ended up checking a list of books, because I was sure there was a book about a girl’s friend getting leukaemia and dying that I should mention. Couldn’t find it, but I DID get some insight into why people might complain about the award!

The first award was issued in 1922. The first 40 years have a LOT of historical fiction (often sad or depressing), child and their animal stories (often sad and depressing), and stories about the lives of people in exotic and tragic far away places (almost ALWAYS sad). These stop dominating the list, but never die out. By the 60s and 70s we start to get a bunch of really good Sci-fi. And I’m pretty sure there’s a lot of good slice-of-life stories about normal kid events, but I can tell you nothing about their patterns. (Stories about normal kids tended to be so alienating that they made me wonder if I was real.) But the people choosing these things REALLY like stuff set in the past. And people who write things set in the past usually want to talk about how hard the past was, and how good we have it now.

*lotions you* *lotions you* *lotions you* *lotions you* *lotions you* *lotions you*