wanting and not wanting at the same time

a comic for asexual awareness week

bringing this back today for the start of pride month. still overwhelmed by how well this comic went down and with how many people relate. it’s easy to think aro-ace people are all totally accepting of their identities and really proud of who they are. i guess on websites like this you see a lot of people proudly putting their identity in their bio, a flag in their profile picture.

in fact i think a lot of aro-ace people really hate that part of themselves, hide it, and struggle for a long time to ‘accept’ who they are and feel any sense of ‘pride’. that’s the feeling i wanted to capture here. the disappointment, the loneliness, upon realising that you can’t feel what is such a wonderful thing. the embarrassment of not being ‘normal’, of being some random sexuality that nobody irl has heard of, and letting down those around you because you can’t be who they want you to be. how desperately you want to change, how desperately you want to feel. but you just can’t.

i know not all aro-ace people feel like this. i know lots of aro and/or ace people feel able to be in relationships, to feel closeness and have partners in other ways. but i think it’s important to be aware that some aro-ace people do feel like this.

the comments on this comic have mostly been great but a few have been very frustrating. a comment it got a lot was along the lines of ‘aw!! you don’t need to have sex to be in a relationship!’. you completely missed the point, hah. this is not a comic about sex. it’s about a lack of feeling, the lack of something beautiful other people seem to have. another comment that popped up a few times was ‘maybe she’s a lesbian’. well maybe lesbians and aro/ace girls have more in common than people think - maybe they both often struggle to accept that they feel no attraction to men, even though society has conditioned them to do so, sometimes spending years trying to force themselves to like men in that way, when they just can’t.

this comic is called ‘wanting and not wanting at the same time’ because she wants to love. but when it comes down to the reality, she can’t fulfil the requirements of that. she wants to love someone forever, to get married and have children and grow old with her soulmate, but she doesn’t want it with this person. or that person. or anyone she meets or will ever meet. a sort of catch 22, i guess.

hope that makes sense. thanks for listening, and have a lovely pride month ❤️

so in psychology class we got to learn why foot fetishes are so prevelant! basically your brain stores the structural information for your body generally in the correct order (i.e. the info for your ears is stored next to the info for the head, which is stored next to the neck, etc.) BUT. The info for the feet is stored right next to the info for the genitalia and so sometimes these two sections of information can overlap and make you wanna lick some toes

thanks, i hate it

Normally when y’all post this kinda shit it’s blatantly incorrect, but I’m angry to say that this one is absolutely factual

Comrades, Henry Scott Tuke 1924.

Two bros chilling at the beach 5 feet apart cuz they’re not gay

…and they were comrades

oh my god, they were comrades 

Andy Samberg Shares His Rejected Golden Globes Jokes.

imagine miles’ dad is on his way home one night when he spots spiderman sitting by himself on the roof of a building

he looks small, and lonely, and fragile

and jefferson, who has a son around spiderman’s age, can’t ignore the impulse to make sure he’s okay

so he finds his way to spiderman’s perch and settles down next to him

they sit in silence for a long time, spiderman staring up at the moon in thoughtful silence

it’s almost five minutes before he finally speaks

“i was there, you know”

jefferson doesn’t understand

spiderman hugs his leg to his chest, resting his cheek on his knee as he turns his face to the officer sitting at his side

“when peter died,” he says by way of explanation, and his voice is wavering with the threat of tears. “i’d only had my powers for a day, and i was so scared. i had no idea what was happening to me. but then he showed up.”

jefferson is baffled, his whole world turned on its axis. somehow, he’d never thought about who spiderman had been before he was spiderman. there was a part of him that had just kind of assumed he’d been different from birth. a part of him had bought into the lie that spiderman was indestructible, that he had always known what he was doing and who he was.

“he said he’d teach me,” says spiderman, voice bitter with longing. “he promised he’d show me the ropes and be there for me when i needed him. and then he died.”

“i’m sorry you had to experience that,” says jefferson, because he doesn’t know what else to say. and it’s the most natural feeling in the world to reach out to the young hero and wrap him in a hug.

he fits in jefferson’s arms like he’s always belonged there, and in a moment of clarity, jefferson feels everything click into place

“i watched fisk kill him, and i didn’t do anything,” sobs the child in his arms, the child that jefferson would recognize anywhere, in any life. “it’s my fault he died. i killed spiderman”

“Oh miles,” he says, voice gentle as he reaches down to remove the mask from his son’s face so he can wipe his tears away with gentle fingers. “you didn’t kill spiderman. you brought him back to us.”

I see OP just wants to dehydrate me via crying huh

imagine following all my accounts and have to see me post the same thing 25 times every day

Vegans of tumblr, listen up. Harvesting agave in the quantities required so you dont have to eat honey is killing mexican long-nosed bats. They feed off the nectar and pollinate the plants. They need the agave. You want to help the environment? Go back to honey. Your liver and thyroid will thank you, as well. Agave is 90% fructose, which can cause a host of issues. Bye.

Beekeeper here! Just wanted to say that the fact that vegans won’t eat honey is very silly. Harvesting honey does not hurt bees. The invention of modern moveable-frame hives means we can remove a selected frame, extract the honey and return it without killing a single bee.

If we destroyed the colony to harvest honey there would be no bees for next year, and beekeepers are incredibly careful to keep their bees healthy and thriving. We take *excess* honey that they don’t need, and it stops the hive from becoming honey-bound, meaning that there’s so much honey the Queen has nowhere to lay eggs. And if the winter is harsher than expected and the remaining honey store runs low, we feed the bees plenty to make sure they survive. We also make sure that pests are controlled, bees are treated for disease, and the hive is weatherproof and in good repair, all things that wild bees struggle with.

Keeping bees in properly managed hives where they don’t starve or die from preventable disease is much better for them than being left to fend for themselves, and they’re far too important to be left alone.

All the fruits and vegetables that vegans *do* eat couldn’t exist without bees, and the hives which pollinate those crops also produce excess honey which the beekeepers can sell to help keep themselves and their hives going.

TLDR: BUY THE HONEY, HELP THE BEES.

im going to make a “never read homestuck” pride flag

here it is! the colors are the characters’ theme colors inverted and the star represents being able to read zodiac posts normally :)

my brain: remember when u were really attracted to the dude from phill of the future when u were a kid?

taviv ullman:

my brain: cuz u still are. 

When he was on Disney channel he went by Ricky Ullman but then later went back to using his unambiguously ethnic Hebrew name and I’ve always thought that was very sexy of him

His name is RAVIV ULLMAN, you’re right, sorry for the typo! 

And yes, that caught my attention because i didn’t remembered him by that name, thank you for giving us that sexy information.

Some trans guy tips from your dad

@shyguyshiloh @kuchenkat

Spread the word, especially for the board shorts thing!!!!!! They do WONDERS for making hips appear slimmer!!!!!

@cloudstreamer

for my masculine children :-*

Adding a couple things. 

-Patience is a virtue you need to come to terms with. Even on T, things take time. My voice dropped immediately, but my cycle continued for 6 months. We’re all different. 

-In the summer, HYDRATE YOURSELF. A binder is an extra layer, and mine have always been very warm. 

-When its not too hot, layers are your friend. You’d be surprised what even simply an undershirt can do to smooth out your look. 

-You are going to get misgendered. This is a fact, and it sucks. Learn to politely correct people. Remember you might be the first (openly) trans person they meet, so be a good ambassador. 

-When you start T, your smell will change. You will sweat like you’ve never sweat before, and it WILL STINK. Adjust your bathing habits accordingly. 

*coughs in direction of my trans friendos*

If you have a really large chest you might do better with Underworks binders. They aren’t pretty, they’re not soft, but they do a good job and were the first on the market for a very long time. I couldn’t stand gc2b so if you’re like me, try Underworks.

Don’t double bind.

DON’T USE DUCK TAPE. I still have scars from a dumb decision I made as a teen and I’m 31 now.

When the time comes for top surgery, shop around. Find someone who will tailor your chest to your needs. Look at their portfolio. Compare surgeons. See if you can find someone who will work with your health insurance if you have it.

Be safe. Be healthy. Take your time. It’s not a race or a competition.

*incoherent screaming* MY TRANS MEN/ TRANS MASCULINE FOLLOWERS, L O O K👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀👀

An underrated joke in Into the Spider-verse is when Miles tells Peter the head scientist is a woman and Peter goes, “Cool. Step 3: Reexamine my personal biases.” 

Congratulations USA

Zero school shootings so far this year.

Last day to confidently reblog this!

Whoops

It got way worse… the first was a rough day.

Well damn

favorite trope: the very important hand touch in period dramas

*begrudgingly reblogs while grumbling* this is exactly my aesthetic

That last one is FRISKY. I literally leaned back a little. BOTH HANDS? And that gentle glide over the top before the clasp? -fans self-

How dare you put this kinky hand holding on my dash? That little grope at the end was TOO MUCH

i seriously fainted at that last one. where are your gloves people! is this pornhub?

You know what I don’t get?  When fanfic authors apologize for long chapters.  It’s like?  You gave me bonus content, for free, and you’re sorry about it?  Bruh.  I have already named my firstborn after you.  Dude.

You know what else I don’t get?  When they apologize for short updates.  It’s like: look at these new words I gave you!  Sorry I didn’t give you even more free words.  Bro, that’s at least two words that I did not have yesterday.  For free.  Dude.  Thank you.

And another thing: when people drop out of nowhere with a surprise update and then apologize for it taking a while.  Like, dude, I wasn’t expecting anything, and you gave me words.  I thought this fic was abandoned, but wait: there’s more.  You just popped in and reminded me that this is a Good Fic that I should probably reread.  You made my goshdarn day.

Basically fanfic writers are under no obligation to publish anything so when they do update it’s always a net positive because the story is longer now, and I have something to read, so thank you so much to everyone who writes fic at whatever pace or quantity they want.

This is wholesome and I need to hear this all the time. You’re sweet and kind, op, and i am happy you tell us such nice things!

When you understand that kids and teenagers being salty about literary symbolic analysis comes from a very real place of annoyance and frustration at some teachers for being over-bearing and pretentious in their projecting of symbolism onto every facet of a story but you also understand that literary analysis and critical thinking in regards to symbolism is extremely important and deserves to be not only taught in schools, but actively used by writers when examining their own work to see if they might have used symbolism unintentionally and to make sure that they are using symbolism effectively:

This heart-warming Disneyland Paris spot features a sweet CG duck who simply adores Donald Duck. It’s the perfect cure for post-Christmas blues!!!

i can’t believe disney has me crying about a goddamn duck