This little crab casually clearing the sand from his eyes

windshield wiper

Send me a fandom and I’ll tell you my:

nothing like rereading a book you loved when you were younger only to realize the author can't write

I groom one of these guys every week and he’s quite possibly the love of my life. We play a game called “brush, brush, kiss” because as long as I say “brushbrushbrushbrushbrush” he’ll stand nicely, but the second he gets impatient or I need a break I say “KISS” and he explodes into a ball of joy and kisses my entire face and anywhere else he can reach. It’s the best part of my week sometimes!

Well this is the best possible comment on any photo ever.

so i just finished watching the extended editions of the trilogy which is nearly 13 hrs long and this meme is correct somehow. this is the only line legolas speaks to frodo in the entire series. the only other debatable line is a scene in fellowship where legolas is speaking to gimli but frodo just happens to be near them and he’s cut to for a reaction shot. i wouldn’t really count it though since it wasnt directed at him.

someone already posted this but the kicker is at the end of return of the king where frodo sees the fellowship again and calls out to everyone by name except for legolas lmaooo

PLS i swear i saw this in another version of this post but i can’t find it now 😭

if anyone knows who wrote this scenario tag them so they can have credit asldfjslkf

@pretend-im-not-there is the one who wrote the previous scenario! and @insomniarama​ came up with froyo and ham 😂 so:

WELCOEM TO MY FUCK HOUSE

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

this post is still good even without the glitch that’s how good this post is

for those who forgot about the hellhole that was the 2015 tumblr glitch:

When one of your customers spanks your ass

i thought it was about working in retail omg

Definitely also retail lmao

LMFAOOOO omg I thought it was retail too

Shazam definitely has a verified twitter account & it's one of the more popular official superhero twitter accounts bcos Billy just posts whatever the fuck he wants

i found out that Britney Spears songs are used to scare off pirates in Somalia

“These guys can’t stand Western culture or music, making Britney’s hits perfect,” Owens said. The music is blasted at extremely high volumes, with the speakers aimed directly at the pirates so the ship’s crew doesn’t have to deal with the ear-splitting tunes, according to the Mirror.

imagine chilling in your boat with your fellow Somali pirates and all of a sudden the 2003 pop hit “Toxic” starts blasting and your eardrums are shredded by the violin and all you can understand is pain

An ode to the best walk cycles in fighting games

gods, every time i see that Baiken one, i think, “…is she being controlled by her sentient, independent breasts?”

think you forgot someone

Nobody:

Fighting games:

better not spread that second tweet without the context of the first

it’s easy for hobbies to turn into things we avoid because of the pressure we put on ourselves. but i promise, u have nothing to prove. if u enjoy drawing, draw!! it doesn’t have to be museum worthy. ur baking doesn’t need to be master chef worthy every time you do it. hobbies are hobbies because they make you happy and u enjoy doing them. there is no pressure for u to become a professional in everything u enjoy; enjoy it for the lack of pressure. try and let yourself participate in things without tying ur worth to the final products. if it makes you happy, anything that comes from that is worth it.

brucie baby? this brucie baby??

brucie baby lore

O

i dont even care that much about the joke here op i just wanna say this is the most skilfully rendered meme ive seen in my entire life

Or when people think they’re $0.50 coupon will make their $37 worth of stuff less than $10. Like… 👀 maybe don’t shop if you can’t do basic addition estimations