god i wish that was me

the witcher + textposts | jaskier edition | part 3 of ??

it is not an evil thing to look at yourself with kindness. your life was never meant to be a punishment

Women Crowning Women

So at work there is a soda delivery guy who comes in almost everyday to restock and though we’ve barely said a word to each other, we definitely Know Of each other. Well this morning I finally got a shift where I could sleep in but my dad was like Hey the cable guy is coming at 7 to replace the cable boxes and I was like alright whatever I’ll just sleep in but forgot there was a cable box in my room. So it’s 7 in the morning I vaguely hear my dad let the cable guy into my room to just swap the box and I wake up to see??? Soda Delivery Guy???? in my room???? Turns out his second job is working cable but wow here Soda Man is standing in my doorway and I’m wrapped up in a pink bunny blanket surrounded by stuffed animals like

@my-darling-boy I refuse to leave this in the tags, I'm sorry.

it took me so long to realize that "orz" looks like a little guy lying on the floor in despair

IMPORTANT UPDATE EVERYONE!!!

Have you guys seen the golden cow its pretty cool. probably even cooler than God

Enough about girl bosses what about girl losers. Girls who do absolutely nothing.

"i can fix him" well the teacher wld sit him next to me bc im quiet

The electron has no one to blame but itself, it pushes particles away with its constant negativity.

FedEx: shits on my box, stomps on my box, kicks it, dumps gasoline on it, throws one of my chickens into the back of the van UPS: whispers at my front door “is anyone home” as quietly as possible before leaving a “we missed you!” note, tries to gaslight me into thinking my address doesn’t exist USPS: sets my package down gently where it’s not visible from the road, knocks on the door and kisses me directly on the mouth

Is this…shipping discourse?

Amazon once threw a package at my door and then took a photo while it was midair. Not sure where that fits in this schema but I did want to tell y’all about it.

concrete meaning "not abstract" predates concrete meaning, you know, the material, by about two hundred years or so

guy who invented concrete was like “this is the least abstract thing I’ve ever seen”

sorry for having great tits and correct opinions on everything. as if its my fault

I’m both