If anyone tries to tell you that Shakespeare is stuffy or boring or highbrow, just remember that the word “nothing” was used in Elizabethan era slang as a euphemism for “vagina”. 

Shakespeare has a play called “Much Ado About Nothing”, which you could basically read in modern slang as “Freaking Out Over Pussy”. And that’s pretty much exactly what happens in the play. 

It’s also a pun with a third meaning. There’s the sex sense of much ado about “nothing”, there’s the obvious sense that people today see, and then there’s the fact that in Shakespeare’s day, “nothing” was pronounced pretty much the same as “noting”, which was a term used for gossip. So, “Flamewar Over Rumors” works as a title interpretation, too.

The reason we call Shakespeare a genius is that he can make a pussy joke in the same exact words he uses to make biting social commentary about letting unverified gossip take over the discourse.

So like.

A truly accurate modern translation would be “I Cunt Believe He Said That”?

bUT IT WAS NOT YOUR FAULT BUT MINE

and it wAS YOUR HEART ON THE LINE

I REALLY FUCKED IT UP THIS TIME

didnt I MY Dear

Unrelated: I have also been injected with praying mantis DNA

This looks so much like a "normal" Tumblr ad, I almost scrolled past it until my brain registered the Aperture logo. Then I had to scroll back up to it to reblog.

This

at least there's gay people

as a white person i can confirm that cheese is basically like god and life to me. i can be baited with cheese 100% of the time. i will tunnelvision a wedge of sharp cheddar from the other side of the room in any and every setting

I'd really love a scene at the end of a horror movie where a group of indigenous people are preparing to enter the home of a colonizing lord to end his reign of terror and one man helpfully starts handing out handfuls of smoked gouda.

Confused villager: What's this?

Rebel Elder: Cheese, it's their one weakness.

Dodie Month; day four | Free Day ~ Dodie’s advice for trans kids

odin is like “when thor was born the sun shone bright upon his beautiful face. i found loki on the sidewalk outside a taco bell”

Oðinn spake:

Bright the sun shone | at the time of Þor’s birth, And bathed his count'nance fair. Loki, wolf-father, | the trickster, the liar, I found on the cold pavement While returning in glory | from a grand hunt For a 3 AM quesadilla.

@damn-fuck-i-burnt-myself-again

I need this framed on my wall it’s so beautiful. 

@theshitpostcalligrapher

ay @systlin hmu

@systlin

My husband complained that this was more Shakespeare than Eddas, and I challenged him to do better.

Solen sken, skönt gyllene

Dagen Tor föddes

På trottoaren, vid Taco Bell

Där låg Loke

—KJN

My translation:

The sun shone, sweet golden

The day of Tor’s birth

On the tarmac, by Taco Bell

There lay Loki

(For poetry reasons, Thor needs the Swedish spelling.)

@bold-sartorial-statement

ay yo show ur husband 

@bold-sartorial-statement no but hang on this should be in runes: 

(oops spot the typos)

i wanna translate this into icelandic so imma do it 

Sólin skein, björt og gullin við fæðingu Þórs á stígnum við Taco Bell Þar lá Loki

The amount of quality going into these shitposts is amazing

This is not shitposting, this is transformative work!

And in Danish because why not:

Solen skinnede, skøn og gylden

På dagen for Tors fødsel

På asfalten ved Taco Bell

Dér lå Loke

“LEV MERE (LIVE MAS)”

*Snorts*

When Thor born

He hair shine brite

A very very

Magical site

But then I see

A bab from hell

I pik up loki

From taco bell

the rosetta stone of shitposting

@incorrectnorse-quotes

Now THIS is the best post on this hellsite

"Read Banned Books" a new full page cartoon essay published in The New York Times Arts & Leisure section today.

A good day to reblog this, I just found out The Deep & Dark Blue is on another new ban list, this time in Colorado. Hooray.

Reblog if you’re 30 or older

This is an experiment to see if there really are as few of us as people think.You can also use this to freak out your followers who think you’re 25 or something. Yay!

I know it’s not hard to point out reactionaries hypocrisy when it comes to like safe spaces or hug boxes or whatever but genuinely how much of an echo chamber do you have to exist in for you to think this is a reasonable thing to say

reblog if attacking fascism is really the hill you want to die on

this is literally like one of the most justified and honorable hills you could die on??? lol??

Quick someone reply with the gif™️

Always reblog this if you are cool

Y'all are amazing. Reblog to hug the person you’re reblogging from.