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* 𝕟𝕠 𝕣𝕖𝕞𝕠𝕣𝕤𝕖 .

@delusionaliisms / delusionaliisms.tumblr.com

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╰— ♔ ┆ ofcravings.

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alfie remembered when he was younger wanting a love that his parents never really got. he saw them fight constantly , whatever flame that had been between them died by the time he was five and it he remembers , although he never understood , that it hurt to see his mom hurt. he wanted someone to look at him with that same level of intensity and interest as they did when they were too busy trying to win the other over to care much about how ridiculously cheesy they might seem. it was a miracle that he found xander , that he worked up the courage and that the man didn’t turn him away as quickly as he appeared. crazily enough he remembered after that meeting feeling something deep in his gut telling him to hold on to this one and he’s glad he listened because here he was immersed in that exact same love he had always dreamed about. ‘ flattery will get you everywhere , fairchild.’ he spoke softly , his eyes filled with love and his smile showing the same sentiment. ‘ but i might of just been your good luck charm , don’t ya think ? i might just have to find something to give you so my good luck can still be with you when i can’t.’ he hummed in thought , if it was more of an excuse to give his husband a present  then anything else he wouldn’t admit to it. ‘ yeah ? ’ he whispered  excitedly as xander agreed to the date idea , fingers going to press gently at the dimples that he’s loved since the moment he saw them for the first time. ‘ it’s a date then.’ those simple words created butterflies in his stomach still , the simple excitement to spend even more quality time with his husband was still just as strong as it was in their newly wed phase ( he’s not too sure if they are really out of it yet even though they’ve been married for a little while now ). alfie had full intention on responding to the suggestive comment , but he was being rolled over with a totally manly giggle leaving his lips as he was plopped onto his back gently. the smaller took his bottom lip in between his teeth to keep his smile from spreading too much ‘ oh yeah ? ’ he muttered out , tugging xander down so that he could give him an eskimo kiss. the smaller fluttered his eyelashes a bit as he looked up at him ‘ you know , as much as i love hearing you talk about your passions. i think this specific passion of yours might liked to be kissed instead of talked about.’
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❝  i believe just having you love me is enough .  you’re most certainly my good luck charm ,  dunno what i’d been doing without you all those years .  ❞    it was more or less true too .  alfie was his good luck charm ,  his cheering always sounding out from the crowd the loudest no matter what and that if anything made him feel so incredibly loved .  to have someone support him that muchto have someone like alfie by his side  —  it meant the world to xander .  especially when considering the fact that alfie loved him with his whole entire heart ,  yet still continued to support him through his matches even though it wasn’t exactly safe .  xander knows plenty of other married boxers ,  some of which have spouses who are not as fond of their side job and constantly begging them to stop before it goes too far .  and xander feels so incredibly lucky that alfie isn’t like that ,  he adores this boy for sticking by him and letting him get out there ,  cheering on with bright eyes and the loudest voice .  he’s got his boy under him ,  trapped between his body and the mattress ,  strong arms now holding himself up so he doesn’t crush his husband .   brows raise and a curious hum flows .    ❝  oh ?  so you don’t want to hear about how passionate i am about you ?  ❞    teasing ,  there’s a small smirk on his lips as he ghosts his lips over alfie’s ,  just gently brushing over them before he’s trailing his lips down .  a trail of tiny kisses is led down to his neck ,  chaste kisses pressed over his skin ,  each one packed with love and adoration that he holds in his heart for this male .    ❝  is this what you mean are these kisses okay ?  ❞    he’s teasing again and he breathes out an airy chuckle into his skin ,  still continuing with the light kisses all over .

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He traced my face with his fingers, And every time he would pass my lips I’d chase them for a kiss. I nuzzled my face in his hand And he’d laugh He thought it was sweet. He’d kiss my shoulders and rub my back and I’d make little noises of approvement. He’d laugh again. And I’d just look back at him With nothing but love and adoration And he would look at me With those coffee eyes And we would just lye there like that for hours

6/9/15- m.q (via nowlifegoeson)

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╰— ♔ ┆ ofcravings.

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alfie continued to mess with his lover’s hair as he listened to him speak , biting the inside of his cheek as he focused. it wasn’t until he spoke about glancing over at him to make sure he was okay did he think of the irony of it all because him doing just that was the reason they first met in all honesty. ‘ oh ? it’s crazy how the tables have turned yeah ? if i remember correctly you looking over at me every chance you got during a match was sort of the reason we met for the first time if you think about it ’ a smiled appeared on his thin lips as his mind played through the awkwardness of his nineteen year old self going up to his now husband ‘ but now , i guess i really shouldn’t go because i also remember the other guy getting some good hits in because you were so distracted. i love being able to patch you up but i want you conscious when you come back to me.’ he spoke , pressing a kiss onto his husband’s forehead before reconnecting his own to the spot and moving in to press another kiss onto his lips. ‘good. you know if i find out someone else is patching you up and giving you kisses like i do when i apply pressure to the nasty cuts then i’m going to go up there and give them a piece of my mind whether you like it or not.’ he teased although there might be a slight bit of truth behind it. ‘ where ever i want to go ? hm , i think a walk in park with some ice cream could be nice. we could bring hazel with us and make it like a family trip.’ he smiled at the mere thought of the little trip they’d go on. ‘ we haven’t done something like that in a while , so i think it’d be nice and i’m sure our little one would like it too.’ he added , moving his hands out of his lover’s hair and onto his cheeks so he could rub the skin under his hands with his thumb. ‘ and then for our next night out i’d say we go to a museum and you can tell me all about your favorite pieces. i think it’s sexy when you talk about art and things your passionate about.’ he spoke , attempting to wiggle his eyebrows at his husband for added effect.
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a warm wave of love and fondness flashes through his chest when alfie brings up the topic of their first meeting .   he remembers the feeling of captivation when he’d first laid his eyes on alfie ,  the young boy sticking out like a sore thumb from the usual crowd and xander remembers thinking how this boy doesn’t belong here .  not in a mean ,  vicious way but more as an observation if anything .  this boy doesn’t belong in a place like the dump where they organized the matches ,  his face a bit too pretty for a place like that .  he remembers stealing glances ,  emerald eyes constantly escaping to the blue eyed angel standing in a sea of people yet sticking out like there was a spotlight shining right upon him .    ❝  i did end up getting quite beaten up and bruised that match ,  all because you were too pretty not to be looked at .  still areand somehow i still ended up winning .  ❞    both that match and in life ,  he continues in his head .  he’s certain it doesn’t need to be said  —  alfie knows ,  he has to .  a content hum leaves his lips at the short kiss and he refrains from chasing the lips for another kiss ,  the temptation sitting heavy on his chest but he refrains in order to plan out their little date .    ❝  then we’ll take hazel n’ have a little stroll in the park with ice cream .  sounds like the perfect date to me .  ❞    the smile on his lips widens ,  dimples carved onto both cheeks like craters on the moon .  at alfie’s next words ,  he’s first nodding along but then quirking up an eyebrow ,  smile turning into a smirk and he wounds an arm around his husband tightly .    ❝  you know what else i’m passionate about ,  aside from art ?  ❞    the question is a tad suggestive but xander gives the other no time to reply as he’s grabbing alfie’s thigh with his free hand and then quickly ,  but gently ,  maneuvering them so that his husband find himself laying underneath him ,  back pressed against the mattress .  xander hovers over him ,  body fitted between his thighs and he’s mindful of the precious baby bump the whole time .    ❝  you .  ❞

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╰— ♔ ┆ ofcravings.

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the thought of being home alone , twiddling his thumbs as he waited impatiently to see how bruised up his husband was going to be didn’t sound like the best night to him. in fact it sounded like one of the worst nights he could possibly imagine. it wasn’t a secret that he was probably one of the most impatient people known to man but he knew xander was right about this decision. the memories he’s gained from being pushed around , tripped , getting lost in the crowd and having middle aged men continuously hit on him made it harder for alfie to find the will toactually be mad about this situation and put up a real fight for his cause. despite his want to go , he’d probably be too concerned about the safety of their baby rather than watching the fight anyways and a bit of him believes that xander would probably get distracted too. the smaller let out a deep sigh , showing obvious signs of defeat ‘ i know it’s not the most … ideal place for me to be right now but the thought of me just sitting here waiting for you to come back to me seems kind of sad don’t you think ? kind of when will my husband return from war like if you’d ask me. ’ he giggled a little at his own joke , despite the fact he was losing his argument. once he had gotten comfortable in xander’s lap he was being pulled impossibly closer and the warm hands that were running up and down the cold skin of his back created an array of goosebumps , making him shiver just a bit ‘ i know love , i know.. and for once .. just this once i’m not going to completely make a scene over it because i’ve been lost in that crowd and had older men attempt to grope me too many times and the smell of beer and cigarettes probably isn’t going to do me any good.’ he admitted , oceanic eyes training themselves on xander’s before scrunching his nose up slightly at the eskimo kiss he received a smile finding its way back onto his lips after a while. after a second or two of alfiepretending to think over his husband’s deal , the smaller nodded ‘ yeah i guess i could be okay with that. although , i’ve got another condition for you mr. fairchild. you’ve got to promise me that no one else will be allowed to patch you up unless it’s really serious because you know that’s my job right ? ‘ he stated , his voice holding a bit of matter of fact tone to it. ‘ but you’d really take me out on a date the next day ? where would we go , hm ?’ he questioned , running a gentle hand through his lovers hair and scratching just as gently at his scalp.  
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❝  it’s a small price to pay for the safety of you n’ our little bean .  ❞    it was true too .  there was nothing more precious to him than alfie and their baby’s safety happiness and well-being .  he’d treasure and guard those things with his life if he had to and there was no way he’d ever be okay with putting the two in possible harm’s way  —  which the underground club he fought at certainly was .  the place was unpleasant in every way imaginable ,  people were loud and drunk and riling each other up ,  yet their cheers were almost like music to the fighters’ ears .  the audience pit was no place for someone pregnant ,  there were too many people and too much shoving .  having alfie in the middle of all that would’ve only fucked up xander’s match too ,  his attention focusing more on the whereabouts of his husband rather than the opponent’s next blows .    ❝  exactly .  i don’t want you in there ,  i don’t want to be constantly glancing over to see if you’re okay and not being harassed by some creep or pushed around .  ❞    it was a legitimate concern of his ,  the crowd was always filled with unpredictable people .  he pushes the images of what could happen to the back of his mind ,  instead busying himself with stroking his lover’s skin ,  fingers running up and down his back before they settle in the dip of his lower back .  palms press against the skin again ,  there’s a small but victorious smile on xander’s lips now .    ❝  i will come home right away so you can patch me up .  even if i’m bleeding .  ❞    a chuckle flows then .    ❝  —  wherever you want to go .  we can do whatever you want ,  baby .  i could take you out for dinner or we could go get ice cream n’ have a stroll in the park or ... we could go see a museumwhatever you want .  ❞    and he means it too .

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╰— ♔ ┆ ofcravings.

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if there was one of the many mood swings he didn’t necessarily mind it would be this one. the overwhelming want to be cuddled tightly and showered with any sort of affection he could get from his husband was his favorite , seeing as there wasn’t any yelling involved on his end just a few whines when he wasn’t being squeezed tight enough. when alfie heard the i love you and felt the softest touches being rubbed onto his hand , his eyes began to tear up just a tad because how on earth did he get so lucky to find xander and have him love him this much ‘ i know which iswhy i try not to tell you my symptoms when we catch up during lunch because i know you’d be down here faster than i could possibly stop you.’ he giggled at the thought , using his free hand to wipe at the tears that were welling up in his eyes. ‘ yes please .. i wanna cuddle you so bad. one of my co-workers tried to hug me earlier to make me feel better but it only made me sadder because it didn’t feel the way it does when you do it. ’ he whined a little , feeling his stomach growl ‘  i don’t know if i should eat right now but the baby wants the oreos i have in the pantry so if we can add that to the mix i think that sounds perfect. ’
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the tears induced by the hormones causing ruckus inside alfie were something xander would never get used to as the mere sight of his lover crying was enough to have alarm bells going off in his chest .  he coos a little ,  reaching over to press the sweetest kiss onto the corner of his mouth and he gives the hand he’s holding a small ,  comforting squeeze .    ❝  y’know ... you shouldn’t hide your symptoms from me ,  i want to know what’s up .  especially when you’re at work .  ❞    another kiss is pressed to the back of alfie’s hand before he’s releasing his grip from it and turning back towards the steering wheel .  the engine is started and soon xander is reversing out of the parking space and then rolling off the parking lot itself ,  beginning their way back home .    ❝  we’ll be cuddling in no time ,  my love .  just gotta be patient .  ❞    he hums as he’s driving ,  occasionally stealing glances at his husband and then reaching over to rest a hand on his thigh when he can .    ❝  the baby wants oreos ,  huh ?  ❞    a chuckle slips from his lips ,  voice fond and teasing .    ❝  we can add the oreos into the mix .  d’you want to watch a movie too or nap ?  ❞

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╰— ♔ ┆ ofcravings.

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despite the finality of his husband’s tone , the smaller couldn’t give in… not yet anyways. alfie had put a lot aside just to come support his husband and the excitement he had built up just thinking about getting out of his boring routine of just going to work and coming straight home had been getting him through his week for the most part. the disappointment was clear on his features in the way his lips were etched into a permanent frown and how his eyes flickered from xander’s back down to his lap were his own hands fiddled with each other. his husband’s reasoning made perfect sense however , which made it harder to fight his logic but he was still going to push it just a tad more ‘ i mean i know , i know how it gets i’ve been there and done that.. but i just , babe .. i was looking forward to getting out of the house and you know seeing something other than my work and our home as much as i love it.’ he whined softly , biting on his lower lip in thought ‘ what it … what if ? i stayed by your trainer the whole time ? you know far away all the pushing and shoving ? ’ alfie would never say he hated being pregnant because he didn’t , he just didn’t necessarily enjoy the restriction that came along with it. it was going to take more than two months to get used to not being able to put himself in any situation he sees worthy of his presence or not being able to drink alcohol or caffeine. truthfully it was rough , but xander always made it as easy for him as he possibly could but it still didn’t mean it didn’t bum him out every once in a while. the smaller clambered up into his husband’s lap where he belonged and took his face between his hands gently ‘ i love you fairchild , i just hate the idea of missing out on something important to you. if it’s important to you its important to me. ‘ he sighed , pressing his forehead against the other’s ‘ and besides who would be there to give you your congratulations kiss if i wasn’t there , hm ?
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actually hearing how much alfie had been looking forward to this one match truly breaks his heart but there was no way he’d be giving in himself .  he already disliked the thought of his husband being in a place where he could possibly get hurt but as it had been the way they’d met ,  xander wasn’t allowed to tell him no .  now though ... alfie was pregnant with his child and xander disliked the thought of the boy being at the matches even more .  and now he had a good reason for it too ,  it wasn’t just him being overprotective .    ❝  it is no place for a baby ,  let alone for someone who’s expecting one .  ❞    alfie sticking to the sidelines with his trainer could’ve been one option but xander was set on not having the boy there at all .  just in case .  he hates saying no to his husband but when it comes to his and their baby’s safety ,  there was no room for arguing or bargaining .  alfie climbs into his lap and he gladly lets him ,  relieved that saying no hadn’t gotten him on the couch for the night ,  xander’s arms going to wrap around the younger male to pull him even closer .  he slips his warm hands underneath the shirt that originally belongs to him ,  palms pressing against alfie’s back .    ❝  your safety is more important to me than this match .  the baby’s safety .  i value those more than the match .  ❞    he tries to reason ,  hand now rubbing up and down his back and he rubs the tips of their noses together .    ❝  how about i’ll come home right away after the match n’ you can give me the congratulations kiss then ,  okay ?  and i’ll take you out the next day so you can get out of the house ,  yeah ?  would that be a fair deal

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