Bread & Circus

bobby said you need to be gay for the greater good of los angeles

he’s gay

and he’s still at it

ok idk if people on here are talking abt this idk if I’ve seen it but one of the funniest/most awkward things about the immediate aftermath of the queen’s death was audiences that night going to see musicals on the west end, specifically Wicked. apparently before the show some official came out and called for a minute or two of silence in honor of the queen. makes sense. silence concludes, lights come down, show begins. the overture begins very loudly with dramatic and fast-moving music, moves to a slower section, and at around the minute mark, becomes a very brassy, loud, cantankerous kind of aggressive melody. and then, after a minute of silence and a minute of overture, the audience is greeted with the first words of this musical, the words that have started the musical every night since 2003, now being sung loud and proud in london on September 8th, 2022:

“Good news! She’s dead!”

I need a way to say this character makes me feel insane amounts of lust but not in a sexual or romantic way

Guards, dissect this man

No it's too clinical I need something that emphasizes the feral desire to devour

Guards, sous vide this man

Guards, prepare this man for dinner

Guards, rend this man asunder

Guards, hand this man's heart to me on a platter so that I may devour him

Guards, resurrect him I didn't like that last phrasing

Guards, grate his soul and sprinkle it over my dinner

MY LIEGE, MAKE UP YOUR MIND

Oh then why don't you come up with something then if you're so SMART

I'm gonna eat his ass.

Everyone thinks they're free from the curse of RPF until suddenly they aren't.

is therapy not working anon?

I’m cocked in for my tumblr shift boss

one thing i learned this weekend is that watcher's fandom is comprised completely of economics and business majors who definitely know everything it takes to run a small business in a recession, and who have never made a single personal or professional mistake in their entire life.

Teeth are bullshit. What do you mean you’re decaying. Get a fucking grip. You’re a bone now act like it. You don’t see my finger bones decaying from jerking it too much now do you

If I were tumblr famous this would be a smash hit

this is so cute

(to the tune of working on the railroad) iiive been working on the railrooad

For the love of god, unmute.

It IS true that being on here gives you a tumblr accent. This morning my mother asked me something and i replied "i don't know i've never heard these words in that order" and she nearly choked laughing. It wasn't even that funny

at my old job i had a coworker who was tired and made a coffee with like 6 or 8 shots of espresso and i just casually went up to them like “are you trying to meet god?” and not only was this absolutely hilarious to them but they brought it up in future conversations they thought it was so funny but to me this was just as casual as saying “woah that’s a lot of coffee”

Being funny on Tumblr and then going to be funny in real life is like traveling to a foreign country and baby the currency exchange rate is biased in your favor

Cocaine was a stimulant used by a priestly caste of the middle period United States called businessmen in order to commune with The Market. [1]

Ferengi Wikipedia

I have been saving this since last year. Happy Earth Day everyone.

Happy earth day

[image description: the bugs bunny in a tuxedo "I wish all a very pleasant evening" meme edited to say "I wish all of my Jewish followers a very pleasant passover". Next to bugs is a photo of a small stack of matzo and the cup of Elijah. ]

Anders Andersen-Lundby (Danish, 1841-1923)

Anders Andersen-Lundby (Danish, 1841-1923)