Fianna, WIP. Poseable ears. ✨️😊

More of my Smuzhka Raccoons! Preorder ends tomorrow! https://wgrass.org/Shop#!/Forest-Dwellers/c/110123009

Poem to the Narcissistic Ex

My heart feels shredded and shredded again,

seems like there is nothing left but the bloody mud of its remains

I wonder - should I put it in a mold and bake it?

Eat it and hope by devouring it, it might grow back again in the ripped open cage of my body?

Or shall I put it in the freezer and suck it like a lollypop once it is frozen?

I still have hope…

Maybe I won't lose myself completely

Though after all these years - I wonder what is left of me for real?

But once I mention my pain and fears - you raise your eyebrows and wrinkle your nose

as if my exposed weakness is a stench you can barely bear

And when I cry and beg you feel offended and injured

Me protecting my boundaries is the worst offense and crime one can commit against you

I wonder what kind of heart resides inside your body - or has it been ripped out too?

Long ago and there is just that hollow cave left haunted by the ghost of your humanity?

Or has it turned into stone for real?

Must be a heavy burden

But maybe that is why what you call kindness and charity weighs so heavy on my chest

I can barely breathe?

Maybe that is why I feel what you call love feels like a stone tied to my leg and - help God - I can barely stay above the water?

But well - you talk of love and sacrifice and solidarity

But have no second thoughts nailing anyone to the cross or bed - well knowing

They can never rise from the dead - no matter how many days they are given.

Dressed up selfishness posing as good will to gain my trust

A fake smile of well calculated friendliness to show the world

that your intentions are the purest shade of white

But my pain becomes words and my words become a weapon, my voice becomes my armor

and if I can not move or change you,

at least I know my core is safe from you

The spell is broken

Your pattern has no hold and is blown away

And I still stand here - whole, lovable.

At least my humanity is restored.

Drunk #pixies, all is well… . . . . . . . . . . #bjd #balljointeddoll #doll #dolls #dollstagram #bjdhobby #bjds #dollhobby #dollhobbyist #pixie #fairy #dreamhighstudio #cocktails #Manchester #northenquarter #malasecretgarden (at Mala Secret Gardens) https://www.instagram.com/p/Cg6DK2nj_k5/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

Floris & Ebble.

Personification of Flood and Ebb. Floris is a merman with short temper, worn out by his countless battles against the shore. Ebble is a calming being, they bring Floris down when needed.

Both of them only can meet when the time allows it.

These two gave me so much to worry about last year… they were 4 months in transit and then arrived too late, after my last trip to the sea… I am glad I am finally able to give them their photos and find my peace with them.

Fischi aka small variant of Nachtmar C: the first version of him I got with a fishtail before I decided to make a bigger version with tail… old times in which getting male merfolk dolls was hard.

My friends #bjd, Ophelia. Who she sculpted and cast herself. I honestly think she’s so cool. She is a @inhuman_craft Artemisia. . . . . . . . . . . . #bjd #balljointeddoll #doll #dolls #dollstagram #bjdhobby #bjds #dollhobby #dollhobbyist #tiefling #sorcerer #dungeonsanddragons #dnd #gaming #dnd5e #dnd5 (at Manor Park, Glossop) https://www.instagram.com/p/CgvtCedjjRw/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

This ain't your momma's mermaid

Let's get the obvious out of the way - this is not your pink or purple pretty fantasy mermaid doll.

This is a creepy, bony, decaying mermaid from Dream Valley. Her name is Abyss. And as [insert deity here] is my witness, I wouldn't have her any other way.

Yeah - I put the shirt on wrong. I'll figure it out eventually.

There are nights that cover my soul like snow

Like a blanket of silence

Muffled becomes a world on speed

I do not belong to

My eyes look out of the window

Into the void

Sometimes it calls for me

Elisa Wagner, Vienna April 2022

Sometimes I write poems …

@lemoutonensucre & I prepare special batch of Tit'Mûre for @dollsgardenparty

Here is marmelade rabbit 🍯 #bjdpet #bjdrabbit #balljointeddolls #artdoll #dollstagram #frenchbjd https://www.instagram.com/p/CczxfwsD9XS/?igshid=NGJjMDIxMWI=

Navissa, the monster girl and Melinda.

Dream Valley Collier bjd with the Lunar scorpion body and Doll Chateau Sharon with Dream Valley monster arm body.

So this is going to sound crazy but well this is tumblr so I will just tell this weird story:

Since I have been 17 (which was in the 90ties btw) - ages ago, there has been this man showing up in my dreams at crucial moments of my life. The first time we met it was more or less just to say hi- like in a quick movie montage I saw the two of us meeting again and again through the centuries living different lives side by side - experiencing both love, betrayal and friendship.

He later appeared in my dreams whenever I went through hardships mainly due to my partners and inspiring me not to give up.

Then I gave birth to my first child - he said he needed to make sure the child and me would be safe, so we had to say a hurried goodbye but I should always remember who I was.

Several years, two more kids and a separation later: he is back in my dreams saving me from death by choking.

Saying that he was sorry it took him so long but he is in a parallel universe but he would come to find me.

That was 2 years ago. Watching Spider-man NWH reminded me of that promise and I am longing for a person that only exists in my dreams - wishing they would come to me for real or just tell me how to reach them .

I haven’t forgotten what he told me: There is fire in your veins!

I will go on … I just wish he was real and here!

[안내] 스페셜 하모니 “스윗 소피아” & “그레이스 여아 에코바디” 발매 예정![Notice] Special Harmony “Sweet Sophia” & “Grace Girl Echo Body” Coming Soon! www.littlemonica.co.kr