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Offline Until Further Notice

@chronically-illustrated

Jorie | she/her | 26 | artist | anxious, depressed, and chronically ill | panromantic demisexual |  “To know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded.” ― Ralph Waldo Emerson
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Hey, everyone. I’m here to say goodbye.

I’ve written more than a dozen different drafts explaining my reason for leaving, but honestly I’ve said most of it already, so you can read my other posts if you don’t know what’s been going on. The short version is that I still think Seán is a good person, I’m just no longer certain he has the values that made me want to subscribe to the channel.

I wanted to keep trying to be here for people in the community I’ve been talking to who feel just as hurt and disappointed as I do, but are afraid to say anything because they know they’d get dogpiled and shouted down. I’m sorry that I won’t be here anymore. I’m honestly just not a resilient enough person to keep going like this. I don’t get any enjoyment out of Seán’s content anymore, so the only thing I feel when I log on is anxiety, and I’ll break down even more than I already have if I stay. As hard as it’s been on me, I know it’s been much harder for the people directly affected by the types of discrimination I’ve seen being used and justified. I hope everyone who has been directly affected has found at least one person who hasn’t invalidated how they feel.

I’m so grateful for the messages from people saying that my support has given them some relief and helped them feel less alone and more encouraged to speak up for themselves and others. That makes it all worth it. Each one of you who’s found that courage has helped other people, too. Positive change can never happen if people just look the other way when someone is being mistreated. Ignoring it solves nothing, and just makes the people who are hurting feel even more alienated. I’m very proud of, and grateful for, everyone who’s spoken up. I’m also proud of the people who are too nervous to be vocal about it, but have been helping in whatever small ways they can. Small acts of kindness do make a difference - oftentimes more of a difference than you realize. Please don’t give up.

I’m still grateful, and always will be, for everything Seán and the community have done for me and others over the last year. I can tell that if I keep trying to justify staying, and keep trying to force myself to enjoy things that no longer make me happy, I’ll end up resentful, and I don’t want that. I’m leaving now while I can still treasure the good memories. 

I’m going to miss watching streams with all of you and laughing til my sides hurt. I’m going to miss the community fires and theorizing and watching everyone do the detective work. I’m going to miss seeing everyone’s beautiful art and that little warm fuzzy feeling when Seán reblogs someone’s work that I really loved. Thank you for the laughs, celebrations, support, inspiration, and friendship. I wouldn’t have made it through 2018 without you all, and I’m honestly not sure how I’ll make it through 2019 without you, but it can’t go back to feeling the way it used to, so the only thing to do is go forward. I wish you all the best.

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one year from now, you will be different. one year from now, you will look back and wonder how you were ever so sad. things are going to change and they are going to change for the better. you will be amazed at the things you can do and the people you will meet. hold on, this is where it gets good.

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I know you're getting through some tough shit, but I wanted to wish you a happy new year Jorie! I'm always here if you need to talk to someone and I hope you're doing well!!

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Thank you. I’m grateful I had the chance to get to know you and I hope you have a wonderful new year.

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Are people aware that the word “triggered” refers to actual psychological symptoms that you can’t just “get over” or “come out of” and just “be positive”?

Being “triggered” isn’t just being upset about something. Telling people that they can just choose not to feel the psychological and physical effects of being reminded of their trauma is irresponsible at the very least, and outright cruel in the way some people use it.

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Happy New Year !!!!

It’s the end of the year so I though’t i’d say some things about some people i care about :) 

@videogames-and-stardust hOLY shit i really don’t know where i would be without you. When you sent me stickers in the mail i was sosososo happy, and they’re still on my computer and i think of you every time i look at them. Thanks for being my friend <3 you make me happy :) And i’m so proud of you doing @crankycrew-appreciation you’re a wonderful person and my life is better with you in it 

@marl1nde I’m glad we’re friends <3 you’re very thoughtful and incredibly generous and my existence is better by having you in it !!! And even if it kills us we’re gonna get that poster delivered to my house eventually XD 

@chronically-illustrated Everytime something happened you were always there to listen and make me feel better, and i’d do the same for you if you needed me. I admire your art so much, it’s so pretty and wonderful (just like you!!!!). You’ve made being in the community a joy and i hope in 2019 you, me and valk can do some more art events together!!! 

@valkyreskye we havent talked much towards the end of the year but you’re lovely and i hope you’re doing okay !!!!

@jacksoopticboop @glixbitch YO HOLY SHIT YOU TWO ARE SO WONDERFUL AND NICE WHAT THE FUCK. Boop your good morning posts in the tag make me so happy (even if its late at night for me) and FUCK YOUR ART IS SO GOOD!!! And Gina you’re always in the tags and you’re so genuine and kind <3 I want to talk to you both more this year !!! 

@pap-is-loud @bri-doodles-art @risingroseakira my wonderful children, im proud of you all and you’ve all come so far both in art and in life <3 i hope 2019 is good to you 

@septic-dr-schneep Seeing you in the tags so much, and how much you care about the story youre creating and the art that you draw !!!! makes me happy :) 

@logan-exe @onceuponaprincey you two hold such a special place in my dumb heart. Thanks for being there for me!!!!!! 

@enbiebrit @antaresblue Where would i be without you two??? Who knows <3 I can’t put how i feel about either of you into words 

@lum1natrix @markired @huffletrax @van-arts you’re all just, really lovely, and i hope i can get to know some of you better in 2019 :) 

@rataccoonn @lansketchbook you two are in my notifications alot recently and i’ve decided you’re both very cool talented people <3 thanks for doing what you do 

It’s been such a fucking wild year, I never thought this blog would become what it is, and now cool people follow me and its just, holy shit what the fuck im so incredibly confused. I know i’ve forgotten people and that’s okay, they still matter in my heart. To everyone whose listened to my music, thanks <3 it’s been fun writing it. And to the people who sent me nice messages when i needed it im grateful. I love this community so much and i’m glad it’s something that i get to be apart of. 

All of you are loved.

Thank you, my friend. <3 It’s been so wonderful to get to know you this year, and be able to talk to you when I needed a shoulder to lean on. You’re such a genuinely kind, compassionate person, and your music is amazing. I wish you a bright and joyful future.

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Oh Look, A Vent Post

So, I will start this off by saying that nothing here is meant to be a personal attack. More of a polite (as I can be) criticism of recent events. I have felt conflicted staying in the Markiplier and Jacksepticeye communities for a multitude of reasons over the past year, but if you have been following recent events, then you know why I am now agonizing over this.

It’s been very stressful and I feel like I’m going to explode. I am uncertain of what to do. Part of me is hopeful that I can spread more positivity and help others understand where some of us are coming from. I know that might sound naive, and maybe I am, but I saw something in these communities that made me feel safe.

However, it’s increasingly becoming the opposite. People are less compassionate, less caring, and less PMA, ever since the “meme” began.

Many of you have forgotten what respect is. What it means. Joking at the expense of others’ feelings is not okay.

“It’s just a joke”, “You’re too sensitive”, “Grow a thicker skin”.

Translation: You don’t want to think about how these actions affect others. It’s easier to look the other way, to sweep it under the rug, or in this case – justify it.

The truth is, you are doing Mark, Seán, and yourselves a disservice. We cannot look at people like gods. That is unfair to them and extremely unhealthy for us. Shouting down people who feel hurt is not how we should be handling this.

Someone I follow who is Jewish felt betrayed by Mark for endorsing Felix, and I can’t blame her since Felix went and fucking gave a shout out to a neo-Nazi!

Let that sink in. There comes a time where we have to draw the fucking line, fellas. I believe that Seán and Mark are good guys, but even good people make bad choices. Supporting Felix is one of them.

I cannot in good conscience ever support someone who knowingly boosted a neo-Nazi (and if someone tries to tell me he didn’t know, how could he not? The video he watched was making fun of Heather Heyer’s death; an activist who was murdered by a neo-Nazi).

And as of late, I’ve been rethinking supporting Seán and Mark. As much as I like them, their content, and certain people in the community, I don’t feel safe here anymore. I am morally conflicted and it sucks.

And do not try to tell me that I need to learn to take a joke, or that I’m being stupid, or imply that my feelings are invalid. Your mental gymnastics bullshit will not work on me.

These communities were once mostly positive (other issues in the past that I’m sure I don’t have to name), but the well has been poisoned. The only way to salvage this is to take out the poison. That’s all I have to say for right now. I don’t know where to go from here as of yet. I don’t know if I’ll up and leave or stay and try to help other vulnerable people. I don’t know.

If someone sees this and decides to respond to it, please keep it civil or I will block you. I am in no mood to be dealing with mean-spirited people. This is me getting my thoughts out and not letting them eat away at my mind, not some pseudo-college debate.

Well said.

What I don’t understand is why now? Sean has always supported Felix. He’s one of his best friends. That’s never changed. The only difference is now its a meme/joke. So why is it bugging you now? Why not ever before?

It did bother me. It isn’t just suddenly now a problem. The difference is instead of calling Felix out like Seán did once before, there’s been absolute silence or agreeing with others that we need to “take a joke”.

@jacksepticelf Sean’s support for Felix almost prevented me from joining this community in the first place. I have always been concerned by it, but I could see how he was trying to do what he thought was best by maintaining the friendship. However, staying friends is totally different from actively promoting someone who regularly makes racist jokes and jokes about sexual assault. It doesn’t matter that it was a “meme” - it still had consequences: more subscribers for Felix, people in the community being bullied in very racist ways for talking about how it made them uncomfortable, and tacit endorsement of humor at the expense of others’ safety and happiness. To make it even worse, after crossing that line, Sean sided with the people invalidating and bullying those who were uncomfortable. Everything about the situation goes against the values Sean has said he wants for the community.

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Oh Look, A Vent Post

So, I will start this off by saying that nothing here is meant to be a personal attack. More of a polite (as I can be) criticism of recent events. I have felt conflicted staying in the Markiplier and Jacksepticeye communities for a multitude of reasons over the past year, but if you have been following recent events, then you know why I am now agonizing over this.

It’s been very stressful and I feel like I’m going to explode. I am uncertain of what to do. Part of me is hopeful that I can spread more positivity and help others understand where some of us are coming from. I know that might sound naive, and maybe I am, but I saw something in these communities that made me feel safe.

However, it’s increasingly becoming the opposite. People are less compassionate, less caring, and less PMA, ever since the “meme” began.

Many of you have forgotten what respect is. What it means. Joking at the expense of others’ feelings is not okay.

“It’s just a joke”, “You’re too sensitive”, “Grow a thicker skin”.

Translation: You don’t want to think about how these actions affect others. It’s easier to look the other way, to sweep it under the rug, or in this case – justify it.

The truth is, you are doing Mark, Seán, and yourselves a disservice. We cannot look at people like gods. That is unfair to them and extremely unhealthy for us. Shouting down people who feel hurt is not how we should be handling this.

Someone I follow who is Jewish felt betrayed by Mark for endorsing Felix, and I can’t blame her since Felix went and fucking gave a shout out to a neo-Nazi!

Let that sink in. There comes a time where we have to draw the fucking line, fellas. I believe that Seán and Mark are good guys, but even good people make bad choices. Supporting Felix is one of them.

I cannot in good conscience ever support someone who knowingly boosted a neo-Nazi (and if someone tries to tell me he didn’t know, how could he not? The video he watched was making fun of Heather Heyer’s death; an activist who was murdered by a neo-Nazi).

And as of late, I’ve been rethinking supporting Seán and Mark. As much as I like them, their content, and certain people in the community, I don’t feel safe here anymore. I am morally conflicted and it sucks.

And do not try to tell me that I need to learn to take a joke, or that I’m being stupid, or imply that my feelings are invalid. Your mental gymnastics bullshit will not work on me.

These communities were once mostly positive (other issues in the past that I’m sure I don’t have to name), but the well has been poisoned. The only way to salvage this is to take out the poison. That’s all I have to say for right now. I don’t know where to go from here as of yet. I don’t know if I’ll up and leave or stay and try to help other vulnerable people. I don’t know.

If someone sees this and decides to respond to it, please keep it civil or I will block you. I am in no mood to be dealing with mean-spirited people. This is me getting my thoughts out and not letting them eat away at my mind, not some pseudo-college debate.

Well said.

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Unfollow me if you think racist jokes are okay.

Unfollow me if you think anti-Semitic jokes are okay.

Unfollow me if you think homophobic jokes are okay.

Unfollow me if you think transphobic jokes are okay.

Unfollow me if you think jokes about sexual assault are okay.

Unfollow me if you think throwing marginalized groups under the bus for jokes is okay.

Unfollow me if you would rather defend the people who make these types of jokes than the people who are hurt by them.

Unfollow me if you gaslight people by saying, “It’s just a joke,” “Get over it,” or “You need to have thicker skin/learn to take a joke.”

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You are cared for. You matter.

No matter who you are, how often you post, if you’re an active blogger or just here for the ride, if you’re straight, gay, lesbian, bi, pan, ace, trans or anything in between, if you’re Christian, Muslim, Buddist, Jewish, Athiest, Agnositc or any form of religion, old, young, tall, or short, skinny or not so skinny, black, white, hispanic, asian, Indian or any ethnicity, if you’re mentally or physically handicapped or have any disorder, as long as you treat other people with respect and show some form of kindness and decency, you are respected back and deserve love and happiness. Period. I care. We all care for you. You are important. You are loved. Always remember that.

I hope anyone in the community who shares this has also been speaking up against Felix and how he routinely makes jokes that jeopardize the safety and happiness of many of the groups you listed.

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People who are still feeling conflicted and depressed after recent events, please feel free to message me. I know there are at least a dozen of us who are too nervous to talk openly about it because of the inevitable dogpiling, gaslighting, and racist comments. I know a lot of us are thinking about leaving because it doesn’t feel safe here anymore, and I think it could be helpful to talk to each other.

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Yell ‘social justice warrior’ all you want. Sure, there are sides of things that go maybe a bit too far, that try and shove it in your face a bit too much. But I mean, is that really a bad thing? It’s still people trying to figure out how to make the world a better place. It’s probably an over-correction to an issue that does need to be addressed, but I’d rather have that extreme end of the spectrum than the opposite extreme end of the spectrum, with the bigotry, the racism, the sheer aggressive attitude and the closing off of your mind to absolutely any sort of ideals.

Jacksepticeye, A Normal Lost Phone Part 2

This is what I subscribed for: Someone who recognizes that it’s not a bad thing to fight for kindness, and who would rather see someone fight to the extreme for compassion than fight against it.

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