im in the process of losing so many ppl rn in like a lot of different ways and some are a lot realer than others (dementia, illness etc vs friendships that are drifting/outgrowing) but its like. combined they sure do form this forest of loss where it really is just a case of not being able to see the forest through the trees. and its also a case of being like. totally unknown? it's a bit selfish but when you lose someone who knew you so deeply because theyd known you since the day you were born, you also lose the version of you that they saw. and all the people im losing had the best versions of me. so im losing them, and im losing her, and i have to go to my office every day and pretend like everything is fine!! when the people i have so much love for are going away and they wont come back!!
