The Barefoot Hatter

anyone want pics of my holes?

My favorite responses to this post so far

and finally, god please no

Yoooooo what that ethernet port do?

Damn you look easy to do maintenance on

House M.D. | 6x19 The Choice

Just the complete opposite of satisfying anime food.

You know when Terry Pratchett said 'It doesn't stop being magic just because you know how it works'? Yeah, he meant this.

since the cowboy and the samurai were both dying out in the 1800s i want an action adventure historically wildly inaccurate comic about the last cowboy and the last samurai teaming up BUT one of them is gay and the other doesn’t understand what being gay is and there are multiple comedic mishaps resulting from this

after lots of frantic googling of “were samurais gay” “were cowboys gay” “how did gay samurais work” “did gay cowboys love each other” ad nauseam i have decided that it’s actually funnier if both the cowboy AND the samurai are gay but not for each other and also they both have their very culturally specific understandings of gay social politics so both of them still are equally like “dude why are you like this” to each other

samurai, trying to comfort the cowboy who just got dumped over pony express: when my lover left me for another man, i killed both him and his new lover, and proved to all in shudo that it is what happens when you leave me for another, and i felt much lighter. would doing that also help you?

cowboy, absolutely reeking of the flask, who stopped howling purely out of confusion to try and figure out if the samurai was being serious: dude what the fuck is wrong with you

the depictions of homosexual identity at the time are painstakingly accurate and very clearly heavily researched, and this is purposefully in direct contrast to how absolutely absurd and crazy the entire rest of the premise of the comic is

you know what really gets my goat?

el chupacabra

I’m sorry!? What?!

Whoa, chupacabra’s a millennial?

The first person who claimed they saw the chupacabra described it as being bipedal, having greenish-grey reptilian skin, and having a row of spikes down its back. She had also recently seen the 1995 film Species, which happens to feature an alien that looks like this:

Oh I was already beaten to this explanation so I’ll reblog this one. Shame she left out one critical detail though. We could have had three decades of tits out goatsucker legends.

Obsessed by this statue I saw today in Le Havre (France) from the Italian sculptor Fabio Viale. The design isn't painted on... The ink is injected inside the marble like a real tattoo. And if I remember correctly what the guide said, it took the artist three weeks to do just that.

How stunning is this

So I looked this guy up because I wanted to know if he was contemporary or not because I'd heard that no one was really able to work marble in the ways of the 'old masters', but this guy is incredible! He's only 47, and beyond these incredible pigment tattoo sculptures, he's done some wack stuff with marble!

Yes this is marble.

Yes these are marble.

Hey did you guess, this is marble.

This is just a giant dong (made from marble). Titled, 'souvenir David'. 😁

More info and image sources here :

My friend’s little brother (non-verbal) used to hide people’s shoes if he liked the person, because it meant they had to stay longer. The more difficult it was to find your shoes, the more he liked you.

One day my cousin came over, and she was a bitch. When it was time to leave, my friend’s brother handed her shoes directly to her and she went on and on about how he must have a crush on her because he only “helped” her.

idk who needs to hear this but when your english teacher asks you to explain why an author chose to use a specific metaphor or literary device, it’s not because you won’t be able to function in real-world society without the essential knowledge of gatsby’s green light or whatever, it’s because that process develops your abilities to parse a text for meaning and fill in gaps in information by yourself, and if you’re wondering what happens when you DON’T develop an adult level of reading comprehension, look no further than the dizzying array of examples right here on tumblr dot com

this post went from 600 to 2400 notes in the time it took me to write 3 emails. i’m already terrified for what’s going to happen in there

k but also, as an addendum, the reason we study literary analysis is because everything an author writes has meaning, whether it was intentional or not, and their biases and agendas are often reflected in their choice of language and literary devices and so forth! and that ties directly into being able to identify, for example, the racist and antisemitic dogwhistles often employed by the right wing, or the subconscious word choices that can unintentionally illustrate someone’s bias or blind spot. LANGUAGE HAS WEIGHT AND MEANING! the way we communicate is a reflection of our inner selves, and that’s true regardless of whether it’s a short story or a novel or a blog post or a tweet. instead of taking a piece of writing at face value and stopping there, assuming that there is no deeper meaning or thought behind the words on the page, ask yourself these two questions instead:

1. what is the author trying to say? 2. what does the author maybe not realize they’re saying?

because the most interesting reading of any piece of literature, imho, usually occupies the space in between those questions.

Also, sometimes it has hidden meaning relating to how art was funded.  For example, Dickens never met an adjective he didn’t like because he was paid by the word.  Dumas included long and pointless dialogue because he was paid by the line.  Even stuff that was purposely included for dumbass reasons can teach us about the world the author lived in.

me defending trans men online: we’re actually oppressed for being women

trans men get to argue that we are women for the purposes of disavowing any male privilege we have while still being able to maintain the legitimacy of our transmasculinity. the inverse is true for trans women, whose oppression disappears if they were to ever attempt this same trick. and the reason is because these are literally terf beliefs, they are bio-essentialist beliefs, that trans men are divinely ordained as feminine, permanently cast as pure victims as a result of this female assignment at birth - we are women for the purposes of dismissing the privileged position of our manhood and we are men for the purposes of legitimising our experience with transphobia. our victimhood is absolute and comprehensive. trans women, under this same formulation, are made invisible, literally made non-existent; they cannot make any claim to experiencing misogyny as a structural force in their lives because they are basically, at the end of the day, men. denying the very banal, basic fact that trans men experience the privilege of being men is literally just transmisogyny. nobody is fooled by your bullshit!

I know "60s housewives who invented slash fanfiction" has taken on a life of its own as a phrase, but Kirk/Spock didn't really exist until the 70s and THOSE WOMEN HAD JOBS. They were teachers and librarians and bookkeepers and scientists and they damn well spent their own money going to conventions, printing zines, buying fanart and making fandom happen. Put some respect on their names.

Salute to our troops (70s careerwomen who put their hard-earned dollars into homemade gay erotica)

It was women with secretarial jobs doing a lot of the heavy lifting, if memory serves correctly.

They had training in type setting, could churn things out quickly, knew how to organise mailing lists, and had easy access to Expensive High Tech like photocopiers.

Boss make a dollar, she makes a dime. That's why she's printing Kirk X Spock zines on company time.

.... I mean... I'm still using my work printer to surreptitiously print my fav fics for personal handbound editions. After all ink litterally costs more per liter than human blood so why should I waste my home printers stash? (Only exception being if I need a color print)

Nothing beats the low low price of free. And being a night shifter means supervision is nil.

FWIW, "mauve" was one of the coal-tar dyes developed in the mid-19th century that made eye-wateringly bright clothing fashionable for a few decades.

It was an eye-popping magenta purple

HOWEVER, like most aniline dyes, it faded badly, to a washed-out blue-grey ...

...which was the color ignorant youngsters in the 1920s associated with “mauve”.

(This dress is labeled "mauve" as it is the color the above becomes after fading).

They colored their vision of the past with washed-out pastels that were NOTHING like the eye-popping electric shades the mid-Victorians loved. This 1926 fashion history book by Paul di Giafferi paints a hugely distorted, I would say dishonest picture of the past.

Ever since then this faded bluish lavender and not the original electric eye-watering hot pink-purple is the color associated with the word “mauve”.

Oh! Just like the Victorians did to the Gothic, where actual Gothic cathedrals which had been built to be bright and full of light were portrayed as dark and gloomy places, because that's what happens after a cathedral is filled with candles for several hundred years.

I made up a way to explain fatigue!

>the goblin leaps to attack!

>the goblin misses!

>the goblin has scraped his little knee!

>oh, his little knee!

>oh, his little knee!

Naomi Klein, Doppelganger

Please be normal