I’ve Been Here the Whole Time

ppl using ahh instead of ass is the corniest shit ever like it actually pisses me off a little

white person online: yoooo bro was uhhh bro be like ..... goofy ahh bro be stupid ahh

Related best(?)/worst of aave struggle tweets

Unrelated to "ahh" specifically but these two are like the Hindenburg Disasters of aave misuse so I had to post them too

shorty got that... hm... it occurs to me that I actually know very little about her

Paraglider and black vulture chilling

(via)

I NEVER get tired of this video. It would be fantastic if the bird was just flying near him, but the fact it feels safe and comfortable enough to land ON his paraglider, isn't startled when he pets it, and is NIBBLING HIS SHOES... blessed moment, absolutely fabulous, 10/10 gold stars.

Okay but the bird isn't just nibbling

Note that it doesn't start nibbling until he starts smoothing its feathers.

They're grooming each other.

This is called parahawking! That vulture is tame -- it’s wearing jesses (a leather tie around the leg that a falconer will use to hold a bird when it’s on the glove). In fact that vulture is employed. Parahawking birds seek out thermals the same way they would naturally, allowing paragliders to follow them in the process.

Vultures are often used for parahawking both because of their attraction to thermals, and because vultures, as scavengers, are comparatively gentler and more sociable than birds of prey!

Wow.

You should really listen to the WHOLE thing because this woman does not mince words

Iceberg Lava Cake by cqxrena

Voted wettest sounding video on tumblr

Me: wettest sound?

*turns on sound*

Me: oh. Yeah. That’s a wet sounding video

I need an umbrella to watch this video

>looking for a new cake video

>ask tumblr if their cake video is creepy or wet

>they dont understand

>pull out illustrated diagram explaining what is creepy and what is wet

>they laugh and say “it’s a good cake video sir”

>watch the video

>it’s wet

the customer is always STUPID AS HELL!!!!!!!

Please be normal

Made the worst brownies ever created just now

Chat where did I go wrong

the reviews are in

Black girls from the hood who buy dollar doorknockers, get their long nails done for cheap at the salon down the block, who wear $20 wigs and  who find their party outfits from Rainbows and rock  bright lipsticks from the the beauty supply store. They are culture. They created this “baddie IG” trend years and years ago, back when black girlhood was ugly and scary and ghetto to you. 

a stud in black leather on a black motorcycle just revved their engine at me and thank god I tore my demonic uterus out ages ago because I think that would have finally knocked me up

what a universe……

I got the chance to road trip out to the path of totality! My phone camera didn’t do it justice, so I painted what I saw instead 🌞🌚