Gay Art Wizard

figured out why there's been an uptick in me getting blocked by seemingly cool people recently. apparently my description looks like this on ios:

it's supposed to say "transmisogyny not welcome". tumblr fucking "coolsville sucks"ed me. i'm literally a trans woman.

ok i wanna make a hated foods poll as a very picky autistic

Tell me why you don't like the thing you picked (flavor, texture, something else?)

RB for more results

it drives me crazy when clothing brands use plus size models that have Little To Nothing up top so it’s 100% impossible to tell if a top or a dress will actually be accommodating to a ton of titty

This vexes and haunts me SO much that I took a minute to illustrate this phenomenon. I really wish that clothing companies would stop pranking me hjsdhgdjh

The reason for this is that the predominant amount of plus sized models are thin models in fat suits. a model on tiktok recently talked about it…

HELLO?

I found an article about that tiktoker here, very UhhhHHH interesting

As a big tiddy goth girl, this shit is infuriating.

official boob post

I noticed today that the deadname of a client was clearly visible in their client file because it was their legal name, and flagged it for IT. I specifically flagged it as "Hey, if someone sees this and calls our client the wrong name, we'll lose them as a client." IT emailed me back immediately, and it's now invisible except on their contract with us, which the majority of us don't have direct access to, as opposed to their client file.

The reason I flagged it framing it as a loss is that what matters to most companies is money. If you can flag a bigoted practice as something that will lose customers, clients, or get them a lawsuit, that is significantly more likely to get taken care of quickly than trying to appeal to their better nature. I could have flagged it as "Hey, this is going to make our client really upset if they hear it.", which was my actual motivation for flagging it, but if I had, then it probably would have been taken care of in a few days or even weeks, not hours.

Always hit them with the profit argument for quick and decisive action.

if u choose other pls explain in the tags <3

Just think of all the noobs who watched the first two episodes on Disney+, were completely wowed and swept up in the story and the visuals, and went back to watch Rose...and got completely taken out by a CGI plastic bin eating Mickey

hello my name is Very tiny flying insect i see you’ve got an uncovered beverage outdoors. Can i fall into it and kill myself please please please please please please please please please please

yknow i dont go there but sometimes i gotta go: seriously respect clowns. they have the worst pop culture representation in the world and also the best most thorough honor code. they're just here to be silly little guys who bring joy and are very conscientious about doing so responsibly. let them to their merriment in peace you dont hafta take potshots. i dont go here but like maybe i should you all seem super chill

Commission info time! been a while since I updated my sheet will make sure to pin this to my profile will put info from images under the cut!

please feel free to contact me in my dms or via my email UnicornClutter@gmail.com and check out my portfolio for a larger selection of example images https://unicorncluttter.wixsite.com/website

Very important to have friends who enjoy media you don’t personally enjoy, both because having friends with varying interests can help you understand why someone might enjoy something even if it’s not your cup of tea which can help build empathy skills and also because there’s nothing more fun then being able to explain the plots of your respective obsessions to each other and have the other respond with “what the fuck”

I started with succulents like everyone else but tbh orchids are rapidly becoming my plant blorbos. Everyone takes care of them wrong and it's not your FAULT because the care instructions that come with them are!! Incorrect!!! If you do what they say then your orchid will die!!!! If you give them the right environment they're SO easy. They're such easy plants to grow. They have been UNFAIRLY SLANDERED by a MISINFORMATION campaign. They don't deserve this.

I am also firmly on the orchid bus

Love these pretty babies. It's not their fault they're misunderstood.

I'm grabbing your shoulders and looking deeply and homoerotically into your eyes. Listen to me. Listen. It Is Not Your Fault. They sell orchids in these shitty little plastic pots and fill them with water and stick them in heavier ceramic pots without ANY drainage holes. And then the fucking care sheet tells you to water these TROPICAL PLANTS with ICE CUBES. Of course they're going to die.

Orchids are a special type of plant called an epiphyte. You know those little air plants that are all the rage now?

I'm talking these babies. You can do cool things with them like this:

And this:

(link to the Etsy shop btw. These look cool. Though honestly you can probably find some art miniatures and do this yourself without much effort)

They don't have roots, so you can do whatever you want with them. You can put them in a globe or put them on a statue or just leave them on a table, they don't care. They're super low maintenance and easy to keep alive. All you have to do is dunk them in water once a week.

That's an orchid. An orchid is an air plant. In the wild, they grow on trees. Their roots are designed to anchor them to trees, not to dig into the soil. They NEED air. The moment they get waterlogged, which they will in those shitty little pots that you buy them in, they're going to rot, and eventually the whole plant will die. They can't have ANY sitting water. None. They need pots with drainage holes that are elevated so air can reach them from the top and bottom. This is what I mean by elevated btw:

Put something at the bottom of the pot that creates an air gap between it and the surface. Make sure it has gaps so air can flow through. Put a plate at the bottom to catch water when you water your orchid, every 2 weeks or whenever you remember. I have solved all your orchid woes.

And don't water them with fucking ice cubes. I'm going to find whoever invented the ice cube advice and fight them with my fists. These are tropical plants. They don't know what ice is. They're not evolved to deal with below freezing temperatures. If you water them with ice cubes you're just going to give your orchid frostbite, and it will die. No ice cubes.

ALSO if your orchid is in a pot, make sure you use orchid bark, not soil, as its potting medium. Though, honestly, you don't even need a pot. Like:

Look at them, just chilling. THIS is how they grow in the wild:

I think that's a different species of orchid than the phalaenopsis orchid we grow in cultivation, but the point still stands. That ^ is their natural habitat.

You can see the roots are just hanging out in the open. This is why air is so important to them. Air is more important than water. I'm like ?? 90% sure orchids can absorb ambient water through the air, but I'm not 100% sure so don't quote me on that. I did forget to water my orchids for 2 months once and they were fine, so. 🤷‍♀️ As long as they have enough air flow, they're more like succulents in terms of care. You water when you remember to, and just forget about them the rest of the time.

All this is so good! Also, if you have a bathroom window, they LOVE the humidity in there. I grew a whole windowsill full for years and it was so easy!

I joke that I do orchid rescue now because someone gave my granny one that had been potted in dirt why?!?!😭😭😭 And I have to restrain myself from getting more at the grocery store every time I go just like I have to restrain myself from bringing home more cats when I go to buy cat food. I have 5 now that I've had for years, and I'm out of space in my apartment windows unless I replace other plants, but I want more so bad.

Some orchid resources that have been helpful to me are Miss Orchid Girl on YouTube and RepotMe.com

‘i have to take medication because my immune system decided kinkshaming the trees is more important than breathing’ is objectively an insane concept. thumbs down to seasonal allergies.

“I just want my body to stop telling shrubbery it is problematic”

Sex pollen is real and my body is violently rejecting it

The old school lack of transparency on tumblr is amazing because you assume the people you follow must all be equivalent to you and then you see someone write “I brought my youngest to college today” and someone else write “my mom wouldn’t let me listen to Ariana Grande when I was a kid” and then your head explodes

and we need that! keeps us humble. 

Then I'm just like WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU’RE AN ADULT

It goes the other way, too, because WHAT DO YOU MEAN YOU'RE A CHILD?!!

I'm 16, that's like, barely a child

I'm in my 30s. You are baby

I'm older than both of you in a trenchcoat.

honestly one of the best things we can do for ourselves is realize that people of different ages than us can still be the same kind of person as us. it's humbling and it gives everyone involved a sense of continuity, and it busts those stupid generational stereotypes media is so fond of.