R ☽

lot of thoughts and no thoughts at the same time

→ synopsis: a brief look inside the mind and emotions of a grieving immortal, who once loved and was loved.

→ contains: lee heeseung (x gn!reader), implied character death, talks of grief, and angst. less than 0.518k words.

→ notes: perhaps shorter than i'd intended it to be, but it's here! fished out of my ocean of drafts, enjoy! hope you can leave a feedback/reblog at the end of it, folks! that would be great <3

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It strikes you in the chest, maybe even painlessly at first. Maybe you grow numb, cold and empty, unfeeling. Some shut down almost immediately, whereas some, slowly but surely, start to lose a sense of themselves. He’d witnessed enough of it on his mortal friends, that he’d become almost familiar with the signs. Many had kept up a facade of wellness, some had torn down their room in a fit of rage against the unfairness of fate, of the suddenness of it all. There had also been a few who’d not been able to live with themselves.

He’d thought that he was familiar with grief, the state of being. Arrogantly enough, Lee Heeseung had been too confident, believing himself to be an expert on it. When the day would inevitably come, he’d know what to do and what not to do. What could and might not happen. Devising strategies, he’d thought mighty of himself, safe from ever feeling too much anger, sadness, or pain. He’d pried himself away from too much love, too much affection.

Then, you’d arrived.

permanent taglist (two). @junityy @jeonqquk @leavethemonsteralive @iuwon @envirae @fairyjunn @renjunvrse @rae-blogging @enhyseob @jitaros @jdyunvrs @kdyism @yourlocalhotgf @strwberrydinosaur @mark-lees-world @99outros @thekinkpopstandsforkrackheads @tyongishs @yutaalove @yangianwon @icywhatim @sunshine-skz @sooblv @whoe-dis @thegracerammy @injanggarden @90sni-ki @wccycc @sunfics @woo-minhee02 @yyxy27 @jaeyuncult @feverheeseung @bigsobforskz @hello-yagirldani @soobin-chois @jaysbestie @lee-known @ni-kiii @jungwonerz @sunoosbestie @95sjcc @sk4tersoobin @ja4hyvn @ant-ton-ya @blushlin @stealanity @renjuns-grillfreind @pshflrts @norifilms

𝐄𝐘𝐄𝐒 𝐎𝐅𝐅 𝐘𝐎𝐔 ━━ 𝐘𝐀𝐍𝐆 𝐉𝐔𝐍𝐆𝐖𝐎𝐍

"hey! pay some attention, please." you lightly smack the top of his head with a rolled sheet of paper when you notice the way he seems lost in thought, staring right at your face unblinking.

lashes fluttering shut from the sudden wake-up call, he lets out a huff of indignation, "no need to get so violent now."

"you asked for help and here i am, trying to help you, but you're not even properly listening. do you want to fail this exam?" your fingers tap on his forehead, "keep this thing open for chemistry too, you dork. not everything is about your upcoming competition. coach said you wouldn't be participating if you have bad grades."

jungwon holds off your fingers in his hand, flicking your nose with his other hand to get revenge, "i know that, but it's just hard, okay?"

❝ shit, this is red too ❞

jun ☾ attacca jacket op.1 

He is still as cuddly as ever

captain (shu)america

JUNGWON :: FEVER (Meltin’ FanCam) @ M2 (210520)

recently saw a tiktoker talk about an ongoing case and say (direct quote) “we are literally watching a true crime documentary unfold before our very eyes” and that really sums up a lot of the criticisms I have about the way people talk about and consume true crime content. people are already twisting real peoples deaths into its potential future entertainment value for them before the family even has time to grieve