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The Bearer of the Suffering

@hazelnutshippingco / hazelnutshippingco.tumblr.com

Main blog! 29|female|bisexual|zookeeper. (Side blogs: heathenhazel, hazelwitchcraft, hazelofthewoodland)
Posts
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reblogged
totally-not-nyarlathotep
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alexandriad

woman yelling at cat meme but make it ancient greek red figure pottery

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swirling-orbs-of-disorder

From ancient to abstract, this one sure got around.

Japanese one made no sense to me until I finally saw the “sale sale/sasa lele” version. セール　セール。 But then it’s a meme so it has to be misspelled?  🤷‍♂️

tHERE ARE MEMES IN THOSE HIEROGLYPHICS

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fromsiberia

Ohhhhhhh…. Chinese and greek are my favourite, but there is more!

#memes#anger at the cat#others' art
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reblogged
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tolkien-in-beleriand

I’m sorry guys I have no strength to explain my situation but is very very very bad so if you can throw some money in my direction it will literally be life saving

my PayPal email: miraneblack@yahoo.com.br

also please consider having a look at my patreon page (link on my blog), chapter 4 coming and much more

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tolkien-in-beleriand

I’m sorry to keep reblogging this and thank you so much to everyone who helped already, honestly you guys are the best and even though I don’t see it happening anytime soon I do intend to help everyone I can if I ever get out of this situation. you guys have no idea how important it is to me to see that someone out there care because I don’t have much caring here with me. I don’t even know what I’m saying and probably won’t remember writing this later but you know I am so tired, I honestly truly can’t see a reason to keep trying. apparently everyone gets better eventually, the bad times passes, why not me? I’m not a youngling, I am almost 40, I’m treating these shit for 21 years now and nothing happens. I went through all possible meds, doctors, treatments and it never gets better. sometimes I tried so very hard to be okay and I still keep getting worse and then everything else goes to shit. I want to work, I love teaching, but I can’t do it because I can’t even leave my bedroom. now is headaches and not being able to sleep while my friends keep giving me money to survive. I am too tired. But I can’t give up completely because without my meds it’s impossible to exist. I don’t want to kill myself, what if I go to hell, what if hell is to keep living like this? I can’t. So I’m lost, there is nothing I can do. I tried convincing myself that I should approach this view positively but how can I have anything positive in this life I’m living. I thought participating on the Tolkien thing would help but it didn’t, actually it got worse because now I have to write the damn thing because you, my life saving friends, paid my registration. And all this happening and the memories of the abuse, I can’t live like this, does anyone understand that? I’ll never recover from this and the best, most decent thing to do is dying but that’s difficult too so I keep going and to keep going in a bareable way I need any help you can give me. I’m sorry, I am so sorry! I know I lost some good friends here because I am no fun and only ever ask for help, being money, attention, whatever. I’m sorry! And I’m sorry I don’t do anything anymore and to everyone who followed me I’m sorry to let you down. I am the epitome of failure. Nothing I did paid out. I worked and studied my entire life to become a stupid ass asking for money on the internet and pretending to be a writer but knowing very well that no one gives a shit about my writing because I suck. I am good for nothing so it’s very okay if you just ignore my rant, seriously. But if you can or want to make my life a bit less miserable by donating something so I can buy the meds and pay the doctors to keep surviving I really appreciate.

Please share as much as you can. My meds end today and I’m not looking forward to talk to ghosts.

I’m sorry for the rant. It’s med induced I guess, as I said probably won’t remember soon but no matter what happens to me I just want to thank you all so much for all the support. You found a loser online and decided “I’m helping this fool”. Honestly I can’t say enough how much you guys help by being there when I think the world is empty. I don’t know if this is a good thing but you guys are keeping me alive.

#help my friend#if you have any money to spare
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systlin
Anonymous asked:

is there a way (in manufacturing or later) to make wool less scratchy? like, even most of the cashmere stuff i've tried is pretty uncomfortable, and obviously i don't want to be using plastic, but i've never found an alternative to acrylic that i don't hate.

systlin answered:

You can, yes. Giving them a soak in cool water with hair conditioner added (mane and tails is particularly A+ for this) and then rinsing often helps.

Think of it this way. Wool and cashmere are hair, basically. In the washing/dying ect process, they often have a lot of their natural moisture stripped away. Think about your own hair if you washed it with harsh soap, gave it a soak in dye, and then didn’t condition it; your hair would be pretty rough too.

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#such good information!#handspun yarn#fiber tips#softening wool
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So many posts out there recently that I *should* reblog. So much happening in the world that requires awareness, donations, etc. So much shaming toward people who don't share all of this.

But with the amount of terrible things happening in the world and the state my mental health? Honestly it's hard to keep just myself from shutting down or spiralling into despair.

Yes, Black Lives Matter! Things need to change and the protests are very important!

Yes, the pandemic continues to be a problem on many levels.

Yes, there are many other injustices that need corrected and tragedies that need addressed.

But lately,

I just can't handle it.

And there are probably others like me struggling with the guilt of not helping enough.

So I guess this is an apology for not doing more. And a plea to please avoid guilt tripping people who are already struggling and frustrated with wanting to make a difference but having a messed up brain shutting them down.

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adhdpie

‘am i Having A Brain Problem or Being a Shithead’: a short procrastination checklist

aka why tf am i procrastinating on The Thing (more like a flowchart, actually)

lots of people who have executive function difficulties worry about whether they’re procrastinating on a task out of laziness/simply wanting to be a jerk or mental struggles. this checklist might help you figure out which it is at any given time! (hint: it’s almost never laziness or being a jerk.) (obligatory disclaimer: this is just what works for me! something different might work better for you.)

1) do I honestly intend to start the task despite my lack of success?

  • yes: it’s a Brain Problem. next question
  • no: it’s shitty to say one thing & do another. better be honest with myself & anyone expecting me to do the task.

2) am I fed, watered, well-rested, medicated properly, etc?

  • yes: next question
  • no: guess what? this is the real next task

3) does the idea of starting the task make me feel scared or anxious?

  • yes: Anxiety Brain. identify what’s scaring me first.
  • no: next question

4) do I know how to start the task?

  • yes: next question
  • no: ADHD Brain. time to make an order of operations list.

5) do I have everything I need to start the task?

  • yes: next question
  • no: ADHD Brain lying to me about the steps again, dangit. first task is ‘gather the materials’.

6) why am i having a hard time switching from my current task to this new task?

  • i’m having fun doing what i’m doing: it’s okay to have fun doing a thing! if task is time-sensitive, go to next question.
  • i have to finish doing what i’m doing: might be ADHD brain. can I actually finish the current task or will I get trapped in a cycle? does this task really need to be finished?
  • the next task will be boring/boring-er than the current task: ADHD brain. re-think the next task. what would make it exciting? what am I looking forward to?
  • I might not have enough time to complete the task: ADHD brain wants to finish everything it starts. (if task is time-sensitive, go to next question)
  • i just want to make the person who asked me to do it angry: sounds like anxiety brain trying to punish itself, because I know I’ll be miserable if someone is angry at me. why do i think I deserve punishment?
  • no, I seriously want to piss them off: okay, i’m being a shithead

7) have I already procrastinated so badly that I now cannot finish the task in time?

  • yes: ADHD brain is probably caught in a guilt-perfection cycle. since I can’t have the task done on time, i don’t even want to start.

reality check: having part of a thing done is almost always better than none of a thing done. if I can get an extension, having part of it done will help me keep from stalling out until the extension deadline. i’ll feel better if I at least try to finish it.

  • no, there’s still a chance to finish on time: ADHD brain thinks that I have all the time in the world, but the truth is I don’t. 

reality check: if i’m having fun doing what I’m doing, I can keep doing it, but I should probably set a timer & ask someone to check on me to make sure I start doing the task later today.

8) I’ve completed the checklist and still don’t know what’s wrong!

  • probably wasn’t honest enough with myself. take one more look.
  • if I’m still mystified, ask a friend to help me talk it out.

hope this helps some of you! YOU’RE DOING GREAT SWEETIE DON’T GIVE UP ON YOU

#procrastination#checklist#how to do things
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