I lay myself face down and end my turn.

working cringe hours at my fail job

me: *runs into the pet store and immediately gravitates toward the rodent aisle* though nature might be cruel to you and humans even crueler, i will always see you as the light in my life

the guinea pig in the tank staring back at me:

jesus: if you literally do nothing else just please. be nice to people

american christians: so basically i should just be really mean to people. just like be super cunty for no reason and get really self-righteous about it. right jesus?

Grrrrrrrrrr…..

Losing my MIND at this reply from my dentist office I thought these were a bot

i started up destiny 2 yesterday and burst into tears because i forgot i had set my steam name to reeses penis butter cups but instead of censoring penis 

 it censored the butt in butter

this game is rated M

reeses penis FUCKer cups

say it with donuts 🍩 (lil mbmbam animation!)

aint this how we got protestantism

INDULGENCES...

2!!!

it’s too early for this

oks

me and the boys, felsírtam

tegnapról

Flags Mashup Bot is really out here trying to start World War III

#Team Existential Crisis

if your favorite flavor of something is “mixed berries” then you have a sick mind

huh well i wasn’t wasn’t expecting for the joker to reply to my post…

I- what?