Penalty Box— Imagines Edition: Not So Happy Birthday (Part Two)
happy birthday to me! have a present🤍 sorry it's so short!
warnings: mentions of drinking, mentions of underage drinking, crying, anxiety, fighting, mentions of prison
“I can’t believe him,” Jamie scoffed. “He told me he fucked up, but that was a whole new level of fucking up.”
“He crossed so many lines,” Cole agreed in disbelief.
“Yeah, well…” you took a deep breath, “I probably did, too. I don’t even remember some of the other awful things I said before I sobered up.”
“He had no right,” Petey piped up.
You nodded and brought your knees close to your chest and leaned more into Quinn, “I don’t want us to go to bed angry.”
“I don’t want him in this house right now, Sissy,” Quinn said.
“I know; I don’t want him either. I just don’t want to go to bed angry. We’ve never done that in our four plus years of dating, and I don’t want to start now.”
“He said the same thing in the car,” Cole admitted.
“He was a real mess,” Jamie admitted. “He couldn’t tell us what happened. He could barely get a word out.”
You nodded and closed your eyes as more tears slipped out. You knew what you had to do– what you wanted to do.
“Cole, can you come sit with me while I call him upstairs?” you asked quietly.
“You don’t want me?” Quinn asked, confused.
“I love you, Quinny, but sometimes best friend number two is better suited for a job,” you slightly smiled at him.
“You got me there,” Quinn breathed out a laugh.
He let go of his hold on you as you accepted Cole’s hand to walk up the stairs with you. He sat down on the edge of the bed and kept your hand in his as you picked up your phone to call your boyfriend. Trevor picked up his phone immediately, “Hello?!”
“Y/N, I am so sorry. I cannot believe–”
“I’m sorry, too,” you cut him off. “We’ll talk about everything tomorrow. I just didn’t want to go to bed angry.”
“Yeah,” Trevor sighed. “Me either.”
“I love you,” you breathed. You squeezed Cole’s hand in fear that he might not say it back.
“I love you, too,” he finally answered.
You woke up just after six am the next morning after a restless night full of overthinking. Quinn was knocked out on the other side of his bed, so you carefully slid out from under the covers to go downstairs. You made yourself a cup of coffee then wrapped yourself in a thrown blanket as you sat and slowly sipped your drink on the end of the couch. You were completely zoned out. The only thing going through your mind are various fake situations as to how today’s talk with Trevor will go. You had practiced the made up conversation in your head that you could probably direct a movie scene for it.
You didn’t know if Trevor was awake yet and it was killing you. Is he going to call first? Or is he anxiously waiting for you to call him since you have to give him permission to even walk in the house. Your anxiety was killing you, so you decided to go outside and sit on the front porch in order to avoid anyone that might wake up soon.
The answer to the questions in your head was answered as soon as you stepped outside. Trevor was sitting in his car at the end of the driveway with his head laying on the steering wheel. He was just as a mess as you were. You stood right in front of the door to the house, contemplating on turning right back around and going inside. Trevor hadn’t noticed you yet. You could do it and avoid what needed to happen for a little while longer. You could leave the helpless boy alone in his car. You could go sit back down on the couch and listen to your thoughts screaming at you. You could, but you didn’t want to.
You sat in one of the porch chairs and pulled out your phone. You scrolled to Trevor’s contact and pressed call, not wanting to brave the walk down to his car.
“Good morning,” Trevor said when he answered the call. The sound of his voice broke your heart. It was obvious that he had been crying.
“Good morning,” you echoed.
“Get out of your car,” you cut him off. Trevor whipped his head around with wide eyes as he looked to see you on the porch.
“Are you sure?” he whispered.
“No,” you sighed. “But you should do it anyway.”
You watched him as he carefully walked up the driveway as if he was preparing for you to tell him to turn back around. You put your head down once he got close to you. You were almost ashamed at how nervous you felt. He’s your boyfriend for fucks sake! He’s your soulmate, you’re lifeline.
He’s the person who hurt you last night. On your birthday. While in jail.
Trevor knelt down on his knees in front of you and slowly brought his hand up to your cheek. You closed your eyes and pursed your quivering lips. Last night, all you wanted was to see him, so why were you so scared?
“Please look at me, Y/N,” Trevor pleaded in a whisper. He slowly drew his thumb across your cheek bone, “Please.”
He sighed in relief when you finally opened your eyes to look at him. It was evident that he had no sleep, and the pain in his eyes made you want to skip the whole conversation part and throw yourself into his arms. He needed you just as bad as you needed him. This was killing both of you.
“I know you’ve thought of a million different ways for how this will go, but I need you to let me go off your script, okay? Let me talk first.” Trevor took a deep breath when you nodded. “I am so unbelievably sorry for what I said last night. I should’ve thought things through before I opened my mouth and said things I didn’t mean. You’ve been through things that no one should ever have to go through. Things that I can’t even try to relate to. It wasn’t okay for me to throw that in your face when the reason that I was upset had nothing to do with that.
“I shouldn’t have even been upset! I assumed things that weren’t even true and then got mad that you flipped it on me and I stepped way out of line. I kept replaying things over and over last night and you were right. You didn’t know who the guy was and so many of our friends have come up behind you in the same way, so I get that that was your first thought. You looked absolutely beautiful last night. Not for me, not for strangers, but for you.
“I got flashbacks to one of our high school parties before we got together when Jack said that you dressed up just for me and then you talked with some other guy the second we walked into that club and I don’t even know why. My stupid high school insecurities that you were into anybody else but me came back up and I turned into a total dick because of it. None of this is an excuse. I don’t want it to be an excuse, I just want you to know why I acted like that. The universe decided to pull a cruel joke on me and I got scared. I am so sorry, sweet girl. I didn’t mean a word I said and I’ll get it if you never want to see me again. I just need you to know that I’m sorry and that I love you.”
You didn’t know how to feel. Nothing that he just said was even close to what made-up Trevor said, and you were thrown for a loop. You understood that fear and anxiety could play tricks on you and warp your mind. It makes you act out in self defense, sometimes rather stupidly. The alcohol definitely made it worse. It certainly does for you. It did the night of the party that he was talking about.
“I didn’t want to talk to that guy that night,” you said. “I tried to walk away, but you were surrounded by girls. The beer got the best of me and I thought you didn’t want anything to do with me, so I stayed. But I did dress up for you. Jack was telling the truth.”
Trevor softly smiled and tucked some hair behind your ear, “I guess we went back in time last night, huh? Just reversed the roles.”
“Yeah,” you nodded. You decided it was your turn after the silence lingered for a bit. “I’m sorry, too. I know you have to be nice to the fans and I honestly never think anything of it. I was hurt and mad and I lashed back. You didn’t deserve that.”
“Can you give me one more chance?” Trevor asked you. His voice was shaky and ridden with fear.
You smiled and got down on the ground to be on his level. You ran your fingers through the sides of his hair and settled your hands at the nape of his neck, “You never lost your current one.”
You slowly brought your lips to his and kissed him softly. It was quick, but it said all that you needed to say. You rested your forehead against his when your lips parted and felt your body relax as soon as his steady breaths hit your face. It had only been a night, and you were used to spending nights away from him while he was on roadies, but the absence of his touch last night left you feeling like a part of you was missing. It didn’t matter that you fought, all you wanted was him.
“I love you,” Trevor breathed. “Forever.”
“How about we go inside and I make you a fresh cup of coffee? Do you think Quinn will kill me if he sees me inside?”
“Maybe,” you joked. “But I think I can take him.”
“You can definitely take him,” Trevor said.
You laughed and accepted Trevor’s hand to be pulled off the ground. He grabbed your blanket and wrapped it around your shoulders, took your half drunk cup of coffee in his hand, and followed you inside.
You smiled to yourself on the couch when you heard Trevor softly singing as he made the two of you coffee. He always made his cup first and your cup second so that yours would be the warmest out of the two. You knew it didn’t really make a difference, but it’s one of your favorite things that Trevor does for you. You looked back and watched him as he poured the creamer into his cup and patiently waited for yours to finish brewing.
Your smile grew when Trevor smiled back at you when he noticed you watching as he walked towards the living room. Trevor kissed your forehead before handing you your mug, just as he always did. You leaned against his shoulder once he sat down next to you, finally feeling content.
“How long do you think we have until anyone wakes up?” Trevor asked you.
“Probably a few hours,” you chuckled. “Not everyone couldn’t sleep last night and got up at the crack of dawn.”
“So does that mean we have time to…?” he trailed off, but you knew exactly what he meant.
“Trevor Zegras,” you faked a gasp. “Are you asking for makeup sex?”
“I would never!” Trevor played along.
“Petey’s asleep in my room,” you said.
