Just a Copper

‘Peel the Onion’ is a metaphor to describe uncovering depth through layers. But really, when you peel an onion, all you get is…more onion.

Today I was talking to my dad and I referred to myself as his son(I’m genderfluid btw) and he said “Today’s a Son day huh?” And I was like “yeah” And he was like “huh, I thought today was a Saturday, not a Sunday” And I just laughed for like 5 minutes

Diversity only makes dads stronger. More powerful.

the dad jokes are evolving

You know you’re an adult when no one praises you anymore for doing the most basic things.

The automotive 12v plug is there because they used to be cigarette lighters… smoking was so prevalent that cars had built in lighters.

You can get cold feet from being in hot water.

Caffeine is the most widely accepted drug in the world

Your teeth is the only part of your body where bone is protruding from you.

In some countries, as the retirement age keeps going up and the life expectancy keeps going down, most people will die before they receive a pension.

The good thing about parenting is that the children eventually grow up. The bad thing about parenting is that the children eventually grow up.

did you know that, besides the apple of knowledge and the pomegranate of life, there’s another mystic fruit, one that grants you a sense of purpose?

yeah, it’s the raisin d’être

The number of people older than us will never increase.

We generally equate nice people and good people as being the same but they really aren’t.

Yeast makes bread rise by filling it with fungus farts.

A penis is kinda like a thumb drive

Me: "When I eat alphabet soup, I only eat the vowels."

Friend: "Why?"

Me: "Sometimes."

Bullets only do their job after they are fired…