I have a lot of experience with the First Order and I’m considered to be powerful with the Force. Well, you’ve seen me… you know when I was attacking you and, erm, fighting with Rey? Uh yeah, I guess I should apologise for that, but anyway I’m good now. I think it’s time I came home and rejoined what my mother stood for, and… well, I miss my wife.

+ bonus:

That moment in a historical romance novel when the main couple agrees to marry “for convenience” 😏😏😏

‘I expect neither friendship nor love’ 😏 ‘We need never consummate this marriage’ 😏 ‘Once I have an heir we can go our separate ways’ 😏 ‘After the ceremony you will never see me again’ 😏

Star Crossed Idiots

Review of the book Zeus Grants Stupid Wishes by Cody O’Brien.

To sum up this book in a single sentence - “What would happen is Deadpool wrote a mythology book.”

Yeah, this guy-

Wrote a book. Here are some examples of why I think this.

GREEK MYTHOLOGY 

The Greek creation myth.

The story of Hephaestus god of Blacksmithing and Aphrodite Goddess of Love.

The story of the Minotaur. 

NORSE MYTHOLOGY

Norse creation myth.

Odin orders Loki to steal Freyja’s necklace. He does. This is so in character for both of them Freyja instantly knows who to blame.  

EGYPTIAN MYTHOLOGY

Ra gets mad at humanity and creates Sekhmet Lion Goddess of Killing Stuff. 

How Isis retrieves her huband’s coffin from the support pillar it got stuck inside.

MAYAN MYTHOLOGY

How to try and kill the god Zipacna and fail. 

CHRISTIANITY MYTHOLOGY

How God made Eve from Adam’s rib. 

The story of how King Solomon judges proper maternal instinct. 

HINDU MYTHOLOGY

Men ask Shiva to stop Kali’s murder rampage.

And this is how he does it. 

JAPANESE MYTHOLOGY

The Goddess Izanami gives birth to the whole island of Japan. 

A story about Tanuki.

AFRICAN MYTHOLOGY

Creation myth

SUMERIAN MYTHOLOGY

Creation myth

The Epic of Gilgamesh: Being born

The Epic of Gilgamesh: Meeting his best friend.

NATIVE AMERICAN MYTHOLOGY

Do I really need to explain why I feel the Merc with a mouth was involved in the retelling here?

I have this book. I’ve read it about ten times and I love it.

@systlin

This guy has a whole website

It’s called Better Myths, and it is a GIFT

I need this book!

@infernoking @d20-darling @askkakuro @thefingerfuckingfemalefury @windows-operating-system

“Daedalus, who is a fantastic genius inventor with no sense of right and wrong…”

I lost it at that line :D

im Rabbit

AMAZING

I know a book I need now. =)

I’m so glad I now know about this book.

He has another book called gorge Washington is cash money

You can only assume the hilarity.

This book is 210% amazing, and I am sad I lost my copy.

Supergirl parallels - I can’t even take the first step in a relationship because it is doomed with deception.

+bonus

Don’t forget people Carrie Fisher once spanked Adam Driver’s butt!!!!

She didn’t spank his butt literally.

Just spanked him after the table read wasn’t it?

I tried to look for the interview to see, and I think she did actually spank him 😂😂😂

https://www.google.com/amp/www.dailymail.co.uk/wires/pa/article-3694339/amp/Carrie-Fishers-Force-awoke-spanked-Star-Wars-son-Adam-Driver.html

“But I did spank Adam when I first met him, so that felt good.”

She added: “He’s very tall so I don’t think he was scared.”

Supergirl parallels - I can be strong…

insp. @handlewithkara​

Love is not finding someone to live with. It’s finding someone you can’t live without.

And…roll credits.

If their dyad in the force was a "bond like life itself" then why the fuck is Ben Solo dead.

Good Fuckin Tropes™

Feel free to add on! 

- that anonymous passerby that helped you in a time of need is revealed to be your enemy/ antagonist

- that tough bad guy/girl has a soft spot only for you, and keeps sparing you - bonus if they get into trouble for it

- person a fights person b and pins them to the ground, their faces suddenly very close together and breaths fanning each other

- person a bridal carries person b when injured

- PERSON A IS SECRETLY INJURED AND PERSON B FORCES THEM TO LET THEM TAKE CARE OF THEM AND BANDAGE THEM

(via theblessedone)

DID YOU KNOW that proper pearl necklaces actually have knots between each pearl?

This is done to stop the pearls from rubbing up against each other, potentially causing damage and discolouration to each bead, and also so that if the string breaks it’s unlikely that any more than one or two pearls will fall off the string. Pearl necklaces (and bracelets, for that matter) need re-stringing regularly, to make sure that the string isn’t stretched, frayed, or otherwise damage, which would put the necklace at risk of breaking, and when they are re-stringed properly, new knots are always tied between each pearl.

This post brought to you by the stop making pearls scatter everywhere whenever you break a fancy lady’s necklace when murdering her, thriller writers, all you’re doing is revealing she was wearing shitty plastic beads gang

but………..the drama

Not at how this fucking day will go down in history. The generation we are today, absolute power.

The great Area 51 raid.

Thank you Karens, Kyles, Furries, The gays, kpop fans, Weebs, Crackheads and Florida Man, for your services.

Oh! There You Are, Mon-El!

Season 2 Mon-El sightings are rare in Season 3 of Supergirl, but they do exist.

One of my favorite blink-and-you’ll-miss-it glimpses of Season 2 Mon-El during Season 3 is this absolute gem.

Oh, there you are, Mon-El! 

*cries in Karamel feels*

Bangarang.