The point to remember about the Beatles is that you get four for the price of one.

But still you may distinguish them thus:

There is John. He is the tough one with the deep, loud, sexy voice.  He wins any argument by sheer volume. He makes funny faces, invents funny voices and funny stories called Good Dog Nigel or The Wrestling Dog.  He has a wife and a baby. It is usually John who bawls "Ah shut up."

"Ours," he says, "is a to-day image," and he's dead right.  "I know that if I don't want to do something, I don't do it.  What I like about this is the money and being famous.  It's nice to be famous - that's why people try to get famous, isn't it? I mean, having a fellow put 'Reserved' on the carriage door and having people do everything for you. I'm dead lazy."

"At grammar school I tried to look like a Ted. 'You are not a Ted,' they would say. 'Teds work in factories'.  I always liked Teds.  Then I went to college. College life was so free I went potty. I got myself voted into the students' union just to get rock played.  I don't suppose I think much about the future. I don't really give a damn.  Everybody drumming on about our future but I'm not letting it interfere with my laughs, if you see what I mean."

Paul is the beautiful one with eyes that slope downwards like Jeanne Moreau's.  He is sensitive and thoughtful and the only pop singer I know to have produced any clue about what it feels like to start off rather poor and end up stinking rich.

"It's soft to say you don't change. Of course you change but you only notice it in little things.  Like food. I never had anything like a crepe suzette before we made it in this business. You stay in a good hotel and you ask what it is they tell you it's a pancake done in a special way.  Then you have it and you like it.  Then people say, 'What's your favourite food?' And instead of saying jam butties you say crepe suzette. Of course you still enjoy jam butties and what I like best is getting an old roast dinner on a Sunday."

George is the handsome one, the one with the most hair. He calls it "hur".  He says outrageous things in a deep, lazy voice.  Nobody has enjoyed himself more this year than our George.

"For the kick-off, ours is a fast life and we get our laughs.  Sometimes we find ourselves hysterical, especially when we're tired.  We've got a thing now about these soft little plaques you get in houses.  We've got one at home on the wall that says 'However far you wander, wherever you may roam, your thoughts will always wander, to those you love at home.' We get hysterical about it. We'd been staring at them for years, never realised they were such a laugh."

Ringo is the ugliest and the cutest and the most appealing. So jowlish is his face that the effort to smile is enormous.  He does this rarely but the smile is worth waiting for because he has lovely teeth.  Ringo's fans are his for life.  He sits marooned behind his drums, shaking his head, grinning and silent and loveable.

"I feel old at 23," he says. "When I'm married around 30 I'll be an old man. Look around and it's funny. The 15-20s look like they're 30.  I've always been free, since I was 16. You have to learn to fend for yourself.  I'm lucky, aren't I?  I'm a sort of name and I earn a good wage. As far as food goes, a steak is a steak, isn't it? Though down here they call chips French-fried.  I don't know about the future. I suppose I live for to-day, though that's a soft thing to say. I'm not worried about my pension.  I don't fancy being a bus conductor. I'd like to be sort of comfortable with a nice house and a few hairdressing businesses. That's a good game."

Angel Crowley being adorable and goofy