@fireworks-etc on Tumblr

sometimes im like "wow holy shit im being really fucking annoying. i should stop talking" and then i pull out my magic 8 ball and it says "youve always been annoying and your friends chose to talk you anyways. youll be fine" and im like wow thanks magic 8 ball. and then the ogre attacks me

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thund3randrain

when the autism is being an actual mental health problem instead of making me obsess over fictional characters again:

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sadhexgirl

ghostcrows

due to inflation you must answer my riddles five

zouffle

due to budget cuts i will grant you two wishes

due to recent layoffs there is only one of me and I lie 50% of the time

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natp20

*swallows a penny* for fresh cut grass

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oddthesungod

calling 911 on sam riegel for emotional damage 😭😭😭😭

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diceydruid

catchymemes

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bipedal-sharkperson

homunculus-argument

Hey btw I don't know who needs to hear this, but those adults telling you that your teen years are the best years of your life? Yeah I don't know what the hell they're smoking, either. I'm 29 and every once in a while I just sit here and think "man, it sure sucked to be 14. Glad I never have to do that again."

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bipedal-sharkperson

homunculus-argument

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sinniebon

mulderscully

u ever in such a bad mood u feel urself turning evil?

mulderscully

had an actual meal. not evil anymore

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kleefkruid

cats would be so fucking upset if they understood they were missing out on the ability to lie verbally

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diceydruid

kaijuno

archtech-fox

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robinante

I’ve said it before and I will say it again: you can call Fantasy High a magic version of The Breakfast Club all you want, but Fantasy High is ACTUALLY a magic version of Lemonade Mouth

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pagesandposeidon

solarsyrup

be honest. are you guys only hanging out with me because of the prophecy.

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diceydruid

honeyviscera

showering:

pros: you get to feel clean. you get non greasy hair, non oily feeling skin, it just in general makes you feel better, more energised, refreshed.

cons: there are so many steps. oh my god are there so many steps. before getting into the shower there are steps. during the shower there are steps. and once youve gotten out of the shower? guess what!!! more fucking steps!!!!!!!! UGHHHH

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I don't remember what you said but for the rest of my life I will remember the car window was rolled down when you said it.

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diceydruid

official-lucifers-child

Wiggle

c4pyb4ra

it did not work, but i can help

big wiggle

bonersniper

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wholeheartedsuggestions

you can envy where other people are in life and still understand it’s okay to be where you are at personally. remember comparisons are unfair. we’re all living different lives with different challenges.

perfectlycuratedprincess

Comparison is truly the thief of joy. Most of my friends are way ahead of me in life yet I am happy for all their successes because I don't compare myself to them. Protect your peace.

bipedal-sharkperson

I first read that last line as "protect your pace," and wanted to share cuz I like that for a mantra as well