Orange-Black Ship Hell

In case you missed it, my post-tros kylux fix it fic, Under Construction, is complete! Nearly 4 years in the making, 12 chapters, 58k words, and 2 gorgeous art pieces from 2 incredible artists, plus my little moodboard. If you haven't already, check it out here:

Honestly I’m so frustrated with this stomach ulcer situation, because last weekend I had Plans, I was specifically going to Fight The Depression and Do Tasks and also Treat Myself to try and get out of the mental slump I’ve been in for a bit

And then none of that happened cause I was sick all weekend and my apartment is a mess (one of the Tasks) and I’m suddenly having to deal with an extremely limited diet (no food that can be considered a Treat is on the good list and neither are a lot of my staples, so I’m just getting down what I can) and while it is improving it’s still decidedly Not Great so really I’m just. Decomposing on the ground because I don’t feel good and I’m really not up to doing much but the thing is I was kinda already doing that before and I was actively trying to fix that but now it’s like. Every spoon I mustered to try to feel better is now devoted to dealing with being sick and a stomach ulcer takes like a fucking month (or more!!!!!) to heal. I’m deeply hoping the symptoms largely fade before that, so I can enjoy some of being alive, but god, like if I have to feel like this for an entire month (OR MORE!!!!!) like fuck what the hell, ibuprofen should not be legal if this is what it does to you

There’s absolutely nothing I can do about this aside from what I’m already doing (ultrasound is in a week so like. I hope that will give me a better idea of recovery time) but im just so tired of feeling Bad. I was feeling bad mentally for a while and I wanted to fix that! I was trying! But now all that’s been waylaid by feeling bad physically so I just have both Bads at the same time and what am I even supposed to do here