MISS / MURDER.

@agentholmes / agentholmes.tumblr.com

independent oc / bbc sherlock based. amélie holmes. private. written by sansa.
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 there’s the familiar scent of tea  ,    warmth seeping into nimble hands   (   lightly calloused by field work  ,   by the pull pull pull of a trigger    )   that lend to a quiet  ,   calm atmosphere.     yet even that may as well  be a rouse  ,    with the uncertainty of the next few moments.               she’ll be cross   WITH YOU.      

starter call  /   @preferslowtar

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RUSSIAN AF SONGS LYRICS MEME: part 1/?

a mix of soviet/modern russian song lyrics as horribly translated by me. feel free to change pronounce, etc.!
  • ’ if only i knew how hard it is to fall asleep alone. ’
  • ’ if only i’d known what’s to come, i would have jumped out of the window. ’
  • ’ hello, we are going to be happy now and forever. ’
  • ’ the silence is scarier when a glass of wine slips from your hand in the middle of the party.’
  • ’ all those people in leningrad and rome think that death is something that happens to the others.’
  • ’ people meet, people fall in love, people get married. i’m so unlucky in that, it’s a disaster. ’
  • ’ we were so late to discover that it’s twice as fun together. ’
  • ’ don’t go meet him, don’t. he has a granite stone in his chest. ’
  • ’ he won’t comfort you, he won’t forgive you. your heart will be broken. ’
  • ’ i am going crazy, or ascending to a high level of madness. ’
  • ’ we were trying to anticipate that day as hard as we could. ’
  • ’ a heart cares, a heart worries. ’
  • ’ a heart remembers, and will never forget. ’
  • ’ you’re not alone. ’
  • ’ may you be lucky enough to find something that burns out and brings you the light. ’
  • ’ i will tear my heart out just to light the way. ’
  • ’ am i a hero or am i a murderer? ’
  • ’ what are my faces hiding? ’
  • ’ who am i without you? ’
  • ’ i’d be lost without you. ’
  • ’ i’m choking on my happiness. ’
  • ’ the sleepless will have to leave at dawn with their eyes closed. ’
  • ’ we are all akin to you on your hopeless way. ’
  • ’ may you be lucky enought to find solace, perhaps. ’
  • ’ anyone capable of reading between the lines is fated to own a gun. ’
  • ’ we are cities apart again. ’
  • ’ you only need to learn to wait. ’
  • ’ you only need to be calm and stubborn. ’
  • ’ my luck is the reward for bravery. ’
  • ’ everything that has been thought of will come true in due time. ’
  • ’ don’t think haughtily of the seconds. ’
  • ’ there will be time and you’ll definitely understand: they are rapid as the whistling bullets near your temple. moments, moments, moments. ’
  • ’ every moment has its reason. ’
  • ’ these moments laddle disgrace and infamy like medals. to some they laddle immortality. ’
  • ’ lethal fire is waiting, and yet it’s powerless against us. ’
  • ’ believe me, you lose the sight of many things from afar. ’
  • ’ life is driving us apart just like before. ’
  • ’ this unknown star in the sky shines like a monument to hope. ’
  • ’ oh life, i love you. hopefully you reciprocate. ’
  • ’ goodnight to you, remember us. ’
  • ’ don’t be sad, smile me goodbye. ’
  • ’ moscow doesn’t believe in tears. ’
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❛ Is everything okay? ❜

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everything is not okay  .     there are bruises underneath her blouse  ,      a fractured rib or two beneath tightly spun bandages  .       theres fumes in the tank  ,    if that   ;      exhaustion worked into her bones  ,     making them heavy  ,      thick.      even so she ignores that pain radiates from her chest  ,     bearing a smile of someone who didn’t just kill a man  ,      &    suffer through an eight hour flight afterward  .  

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         OH,  ME   ?      yes  ,    i’m fine  .     just a bit lost in my thoughts  .        
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❛ Do you think it’s really worth it in the end? ❜ ( if you're gonna keep callin me out on my sin then i'ma just bombard you with memes. )

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hot tea still resides on her tongue  ,     the tang of orange with just a hint of sweetness  .       her fingers are cold still  ,      despite the heat emitted from the cup in her grasp  .     this cat - and - mouse game has been a revolving door of opportunity  ,      of insight for them both  .      her smile cuts across her face  ,    eyes still lingering on her tea for a moment longer  ,   before turning her attention to him  .   

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          NO ONE REALLY KNOWS, DO THEY  ?        (  but that’s a lie  ,   because people like them know  ;  it’s all laid out like a map in their head  ,  consequences  &  advantages that have been run over  &  over again ,    leaving little room for error   ).         i suppose  ,   we simply have to try and hope for the best  .       (    but what is hope  ?   a social construct  ,   a gamble ?    )      that’s all we can do.              

                LIE ,   LIE  ,    LIE  .    

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what's it like for her to be the youngest sibling? any advantages or disadvantages?

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SHOOT TO MISS  .    i would definitely say it’s a mixed bag of both.   on one hand, there’s experience that’s already been gained by her parents that typically makes another child ‘easier’.   it’s not so much of a learning curve anymore.   it wasn’t a ( however pleasant ) shock to have a kid that soaks up knowledge quickly and thoroughly,  to have a child that doesn’t always act like a child.   on the other hand, it was already evident that going to public school may cause issues.    as such,  amélie was homeschooled to avoid any potential . . . incidents.    not just with other kids,  but with teachers and the faculty.    being the youngest also meant being expected to get to a certain level,  and to have similar skills.    not being able to read people meant being more than a few steps behind,  deepening the gap that is already present between siblings  (  but particularly between the older ones to the younger ones  ).  
 however,  it also meant learning those skills and cues from the best,  always being challenged,  and always being leagues ahead of everyone else.    so,  in terms of where she is in society there were more advantages than not,  while between herself and her brothers there were more disadvantages than not.   and it all acted as a learning curve, one way or another.   
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