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well then

@dampuns / dampuns.tumblr.com

Ravenclaw. Thunderbird. Movies|Books|Anime|Humour
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robertwire

DEFINITELY go to your local high schools high school musical production JUST IN CASE A) they perform a slow melancholy rendition of WE’RE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER featuring A GOSPEL CHOIR that brings you to ACTUAL TEARS and B) after the show when the GRADUATING SENIORS are being recognized, a very shy handsome senoir who played the baking basketball player receives a standing ovation for his ten lines, and then shyly grabs the mic and yells KATIE WILL YOU GO TO PROM WITH ME after which, katie, who is of course working the spotlight, screams, so he has to yell FLASH THE SPOTLIGHT ONCE FOR NO OR TWICE FOR YES PLEASE and the whole audience waits in agony as the spotlight slowly blinks once…and then A SECOND TIME after which the other basketball dudes on stage SCREAM WITH JOY AND PHYSICALLY WRESTLE KATIES NEW PROM DATE INTO A JOYOUS BRO PILE WHILE HE SMILES SO HARD IT LITERALLY HURTS TO LOOK AT

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reblogged
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catleecious

Look at that tiny fluff, it pecks at the kitty’s whiskers before burrowing under its face!

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the crows are his allies now.

“THE DEBT MUST BE REPAID. YOU HAVE OUR ALLEGIANCE, HUMAN”

That’s actually how it works.

Crows: smart enough to not only remember but convey to their buddies which humans were nice to them that one time and which were jerks, but dumb enough to get their heads stuck in fences, apparently.

There are humans who manage to get their dicks stuck in toasters I really don’t think we get to judge

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Happiness Will Come To You.

when tho

When You Least Expect It. Probably Late March

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wizardshark

reblog for happiness to come for you in late march!

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do people hire Martin Freeman or does a writer type the sentence “CHARACTER is a white everyman thrust into a new world that he processes by blinking in befuddlement” and then Martin Freeman just manifests in a puff of smoke and ash

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prokopetz

I love animals that are, like, the opposite of cryptids: we know for a fact they exist and have a clear idea of what they look like because we have photographs and individual specimens, but we haven’t the faintest idea where they’re coming from - they just keep showing up out of nowhere, and the locations of their actual population centres are a complete mystery.

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virovac

I so want examples. anyone who knows of any should post them in notes

You know, like giant squid and such. We know the bastards exist, we have credible first-hand accounts stretching back thousands of years and dead specimens washed up on shore and such, but in centuries of searching we’ve managed exactly one well-documented encounter with a giant squid in its natural habitat. We have no idea what their native range is or what their life-cycle looks like, let alone how many of them are out there.

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imedude

Are there any reverse-cryptids that /aren’t/ at the bottom of the ocean?

The red-crested tree rat, for one. There have been only three well-documented encounters since 1898, and they just plain disappeared from the zoological record for over a century. The only reason we know they’re not extinct is that one walked right up to a couple of wildlife research interns at a Columbian nature reserve back in 2011, apparently out of pure curiosity, and allowed itself to be photographed and observed for several minutes before disappearing again.

That’s genuinely pretty cool and all, but I absolutely need to talk about how the picture in that Wikipedia article looks like a tiny eldritch horror disguising itself as a peach.

To be fair, based on the actual photos from the 2011 encounter, they really do look like that:

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Hi brain, you obstinate fucker. I drank the clear splashy stuff. I ate the green things. I went under that bright fucker up there. I did the thing with the moving and sweating and whatnot. Now make the happy chemical, you lump of fuck.

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inkskinned

you know what? fuck it, man. the world is held in the fists of people who like to break things. at this point i’m saying who gives a shit. wear that victorian dress you don’t have an excuse for. dress up like a witch, pointed hat and all. who cares anymore. why worry about it when there’s bigger stuff to worry on. i’m saying. yeah, this lipstick is too dark, wanna share? i’m saying go talk to her, tell her that you like her hair. i’m saying she’s out of my league but i’m still swinging, i’m saying yeah i’m in a ballgown and it’s a pta meeting. what about it. eat the extra brownie, tell her your feelings. i’m saying if nothing matters than we might as well give nothing meaning.

This is so inspiring

follow for more optimist nilihism

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