a galaxy of thoughts

Life's not fair, i should be paid for existing and reading books

I am so proud to say that my college is so LGBT friendly, that in a survey Res Life put out they forgot to include straight people.

This is a fucking power move

I got my heart broken and I survived, I failed 3 courses in university and graduated, I got rejected in the very first job I applied for and got promoted yesterday, I went through hard times with my family but then two years later, we laughed our hearts out over lunch, The closest friends disappointed me several times but I made new friends and loved them with all my heart. I did it once, I can do it again.

I NEEDED THIS SO BADLY

Hey btw, here's a piece of life advice:

If you know what you'd have to do to solve a problem, but you just don't want to do it, your main problem isn't the problem itself. Your problem is figuring out how to get yourself to do the solution.

If your problem is not eating enough vegetables, the problem you should be solving is "how do I make vegetables stop being yucky". If your problem is not getting enough exercise, the problem you should be solving is "how do I make exercise stop sucking ass". You're not supposed to just be doing things that are awful and suck all the time forever, you're supposed to figure out how to make it stop being so awful all the time.

I used to hate wearing sunscreen because it's sticky and slimy and disgusting and it feels bad and it smells bad, so I neglected to wear it even if I needed to. Then I found one that isn't like that, and doesn't smell and feel gross. Problem solved.

There is no correct way to live that's just supposed to suck and feel bad all the time. You're allowed to figure out how to make it not suck so bad.

♡ 911 rewatch ♡

shoutout to boring queer people who don’t do shit. just go to work or school and then come home to watch shows. while gay

I hate the americanification of culture, I hate anglicized naming conventions, I hate that I can't go by "Sasha" at work because it "confuses people", I hate English equivalents of other language-specific names, I hate removing special symbols from names, I hate the universally accepted unwillingness to learn from linguistuc difference instead of erazing it for the sake of commodity, I hate the overwhelming influence English has on virtual cross-cultural communication, I don't know how to end this post, I should be shot

Already getting some American responses on this and honestly, you guys could use some culture demystification. Like, "learning about other cultures" is such a vague, uniquely American thing to say. It's good intent, don't get me wrong, but it doesn't take a sacrifice to watch a foreign movie or try a foreign dish. "Culture" is not as closed-off and ethereal as many of you seem to think, it's just a collection of common beliefs, values, and behaviors among certain groups of people.

If you want some genuine nobody-asked-for advice, "learning about cultures" is easy if you don't make it weird on purpose. Keep in mind that not every non-american is your free encyclopedia of cultural knowledge. If they tell you something unique about their cultural experience - listen, if you want to part-take - ask. Just. Be normal about it, for chrissakes.

are u ever sick w longing. and i don't just mean romantic longing. i mean longing for a place you barely get to see, longing for friends you no longer have, longing for feelings you might have left behind in your childhood, longing for creativity, longing for a rich and more expansive life, longing for less inhibition. longing for more passion. longing for ur life to be so incandescent w something it thaws all the frost in ur bones. are u ever so consumed w it it rends ur heart in two. do u understand me

this is not just "look out the window and sigh" longing. i'm talking you're at the grocery store and you're suddenly hit w a wave of grief bc you don't have it. you don't have whatever it is you ache so badly to have. you go about your everyday life and yet it throbs under your skin moment by moment, almost as though it has a life of its own. that's the kind of longing i mean.

i’m curious to see how many people use their likes as an organizational tool like i do, or maybe in a way i’m never heard of before.

do you have strong feelings about how likes should be used?

reblog for a bigger sample size etc etc

occasionally there will be a queer person whose way of living their queerness is in conflict with our expectations and definitions for their label

at those times, we remember that queerness is not about the labels, or the definitions, or the rules of expected behaviour, but about living authentically to the crooked strangeness of our human conditions

this.

diagnosed with woman in her twenties disease

i don't think we talk enough about how childhood bullying really just. fucks up your ability to make friends long-term.

I'm not talking about self-image or even like attachment styles, although peer emotional abuse affects that too. I'm talking about how it legitimately stunts your understanding of how positive platonic relationships even work.

Like, a few years back (pre pandemic) a classmate point-blank told me, "hey, you're pretty cool, do you wanna come out for drinks and trivia with us Thursday night?" and my first internal reaction wasn't "oh cool, a friend!" or even "I'm not really interested" but: "where is the trap?" My kneejerk response to an earnest overture of friendship from this guy was trying to figure out how he was trying to back me into a corner, trick me into something, or make fun of me. We were in goddamm GRADUATE SCHOOL.

Of course I did end up going to drinks and it was a lovely time, but sometimes I think about the sheer number of potential friendships I've missed out on because I read their intentions as potentially hostile, *even when their intent is clearly not hostile*. Getting asked out for drinks is SUPER NORMAL. Being invited to parties is normal. Meeting for coffee is normal. in fact it's a primary way of forging adult friendships. But i am immediately wary of it, because the years in which I was developing most of my crucial social skills were spent dodging cruel pranks, getting invited to fake parties or uninvited from real ones, getting asked out "as a joke", being given compliments that were actually somehow insults, and so forth.

I don't have problems making friends-- I talk to people for a living, I am overall extremely charismatic and get invited out a lot, but I struggle to forge new connections because my trained response is to be immediately suspicious of people who appear friendly, welcoming and well-intentioned -- even fifteen years later. This is why I don't get the "you should have been bullied more" crowd. Like somehow bullying makes you more "normal". It definitely doesn't, even if "normal" was a real thing. I am definitely a more antisocial weirdo as a result of prolonged peer-to-peer emotional abuse than I would have been otherwise.

This post is making the rounds again, so I just want to add, two years later, that this by itself is actually a totally valid reason to seek therapy. Being taught to identify and manage my social trauma triggers has improved my life A LOT, like I cannot overstate how much talking to a therapist about This Exact Thing has improved basically every single mental health symptom I have, because, shock of shocks, being terrified of people really fucks up your ability to apply any positive coping strategy that involves going out in public. And even if you're like "I'm not terrified of people, I'm just very private!" (Haha me) I invite you to explore what is driving that need for privacy -- that need to not allow yourself to be authentic with other people -- that need to not allow other people in close beyond a happy-smiley small talk acquaintanceship. Because no matter how many short-term surface-level friendships you have, you might find, like I did, that you're uh. Actually sort of terrified of people. And that is a fixable mindset, if you want to fix it.